Are pain fantasies normal?

Is it normal to have fantisies about being restrained and having no control over what happens to you? I've found it comforting to have this site and to know that other people share my interests, but should my fantisies be based around pain, nearly to the point of tourture?

Yes for me are normal because I was trained from mom on large Enemas and long retaining times. I never had a punish one, but mom sweet and careful attention hooked me on mild SM play, I heve a lot of this.

L.K.

I love the pain that comes with nipple torture, punishment enemas, & cbt. It has became very normal to me.

My pain threshold is higher than it is for a lot of people. I had a blood test last week where the blood was taken from the back of my hand. I told the technician that I just barely felt it when she stuck me. It did not hurt at all. I have had her do this in my hand the last several times and it does not hurt.

She told me that most people do not want it done in their hand because it hurts too much. I told here that the veins are easier to use in my hand so it means only one stick and no pain.

For me yes. At least it's not rare.

IMHO normal is normal as long as You don't hurt other people, animals, plants etc. If somebody says that something is freaky "because, because" it usually is only a sign that s/he is a narrow minded person.

You are not alone and pain fantasies and enactments are common. I did not say normal. They aren't normal. Normal just means that something is typical or average for most people, and pain doesn't fall into that category.

Pain fantasies may be common for people here, but the people of the world do not want pain, which is why pain fantasies are not normal.

Before I started switching, I was extremely dominant and was at times brutally severe in my scenes. I guess the knowledge of what I have inflicted on others has enabled me to become very submissive at times to the point that I won't even use a safe word if I have absolute faith that I can trust you. My husband and I have had some extremely severe scenes when our daughters were away at sleep away camp, where restraints and situations were so severe that we could have just about killed each other if we wanted to.

Two final things, first, if you are switching, the object is NOT to be more severe to your partner or to retaliate once you are the dominant one. The second is NEVER bring any aspect of your personal life where you may have had any disagreements into your scene. That will be a recipe for disaster.

PLAY CAREFULLY

Whether it is normal or not can depend upon how extreme the pain is that a person has fantasies about. Mild to moderate pain is one thing, but desiring pain that makes you want to pass out is not what I would consider normal.

I don't mind a little pain that lasts for just a little bit and then goes away, but pain that I would be likely to remember years later is not on my fun list.

What exactly is "normal" anyway? 😉

I told you what normal is above in my post. Look it up in the dictionary. It means average, typical, what is applied to most circumstances or usual,

Pain fantasies do not fit that description.

If you just mean normal for YOU, then enjoying drinking gasoline could also be normal. Normal for you could be having a few enemas per week. That isn't normal in the population of the world, but THAT is the context of what normal refers to when someone asks if a fantasy is normal. It is normal for me to tie up my husband and spank him while he is restrained, or to tie him spread-eagled to the bed and masturbate him to almost the point of orgasm and then walk out of the room, but that isn't normal for the general population. THAT is what the original poster was asking about. The general population does not want pain and does not fantasize about having pain because they want it. They may empathize with someone being tortured in a concentration camp and imagine how terrible it was, but they don't think about it in the sense that they want to experience the pain themselves. The original poster asked about pain fantasies being normal because he wants to experience being restrained and possibly tortured either vicariously or in reality. His abnormal fantasy doesn't necessarily cause any harm, but it clearly is not what most people want--that means it isn't normal. There isn't anything wrong with that either. Just because something isn't normal or is god forbid "ABNORMAL" (the word carries an undeserved stigma) that doesn't make it bad. It just isn't typical, which is what I said in the first place.

Yes as I wrote in another message, my ex girlfriend is a SURGEON AND DOMINATRIX.

A lot of professional DOMINAS have medical room. Some new studio and and web site about medical (surgical) scenes.

I like traditional DOMINATION and go to the surgical scenes. I have good equipment and clothes (white coats, rubber aprons, surgical uniforms). My dream a FEMALE SURGICAL TEAM torturing me. catehters, needles, saline injection, electro, urethra dilatation, sutures.: my special fetish, in teh end of operation, surgeon relax and smoke a cigarette and use for last torture........ if some LADY like.........

We both enjoy incorporating some type of pain or fear into the scenes we do (My wife & I). We especially enjoy needle and injection play. The best part of sharing a needle-included session is when you get someone who is scared out of their wits at the mere site of a needle and then playing on that fear for as long as possible to build it up to an almost unbearable level. Once you actually insert the needle, it's almost anti-climactic, as the fear greatly outweighs any pain you're likely to experience. I hope we can now post a few of our pics here, and I'll make sure to post some good needle shots (Pun absolutely intended).

MCM

My gyno fantasies always incorporate restraints and painful nipple and pussy treatments. I get off on knowing that someone else has total control over my body. I can only come to orgasm playing out these scenarios. Ohh it hurts so good.

Tittygirl--

I can only come to orgasm playing out these scenarios. Ohh it hurts so good.

How long have you felt this way? How old are you & when did you start with this need? Do you know or suspect why it started?

Al C

I started masturbating when I was about 8 years old. My bdsm/gyno fantasies started at around my early teens. As I got older my fantasies became more pain intensive and I cannot get off without them 😁

What's "normal"? It may not be common, although I have read that many people -- estimates as much as a third of all men and women -- get off at least sometimes through pain-related fantasies. And a fair number of people enjoy at least fantasies of pain or dominance or both in sex play.

What I find more interesting is the question of why. I suppose, in the absence of information to the contrary, that people just early on, as children, associate pain and genital stimulation. But who knows? In any case that was why I asked the question of tittygirl. And she gave an honest answer, though I was a bit surprised she started masturbating so early.

Tittygirl -- did you actually climax at the age of 8 when you masturbated? Do I read you correctly that you must have a fantasy (as opposed to the reality) of being in a painful situation in order to get off, regardless of the other stimulus?

And by the way, I can empathize with you, because I often find fantasies of being submissive or dominant exciting. But I do not know why I do. I started having them, sometimes...but not all the time, when I began masturbating at about age 11 or 12 (to climax).

I also find medical fantasies, wherein I am invariably in the submissive role, very stimulating, but they don't involve pain as much as a type of exhibitionism. But I think I know why in this situation -- it is because I had several, quite sexual encounters with nurses during hospital stays just before puberty and through my teen years.

Al C

I don't know it I actually climaxed at age 8 but I do know I liked touching myself. I remember leaving the house in shorts without panties on so I could put my hands on my pussy. I also masturbated in class when I was in the sixth grade. I would put my hand down my skirt. I sat in the the last row so no one ever suspected. I'm also sad to say that I have yet to find someone I trust enough to act out my fantasies with. But I haven't given up hope yet. :😃

Tiitygirl -- have you tried finding someone to act out your fantasies with? How old are you ? -- as we get older we tend to trust more. But for that matter do you really think you need to act out your fantasies? Maybe you don't. I understand from a therapist who specializes in some of these areas, that there are some people who need to act them out and others who need to not act them out.

I think it's normal. I have those fantasies at times too. I like to have that full penetration sensation vaginally and I also like having my nipples played with really hard. I think it's just what some people like and I happen to find no problem with it as long as you aren't causing harm to someone who doesn't want it.

I don't worry about what is "normal" because it isn't a useful description for much of anything. Being controlled is exciting, as is mild to moderate pain, but couple with being treated like a little boy, both are even better.

I think its not normal but i enjoy pain fantasies..!

For me pain(fantasy or real) is a normal part of my sexual life as is humilitation. For people that do not enjoy this, it is not normal. Could I go back to vanilla sex all the time? NO

I love having my nipples bitten, and tugged both in fantasy and reality. The same goes for having my ass spanked.

I think "normal" is a strictly subjective term.

Pain fantasies are the best! However I also like having my nipples bitten and pinched during sex. Can't cum without it. My spouse dose not enjoy the reality of pain, only in her fantasies.

I think while it may not be "normal", it's certainly not uncommon. While I fantasize about all kinds of heavy scenes, I'm happy with my nipples (lightly) clamped, twisted or nibbled. Being spanked and paddled appeals to me, not sure if I want to be caned. Different strokes for different folks....

Pain is a very subjective concept, what is painful to one person might be pleasurable to another, similarly what is painful to a person when not aroused might be pleasurable when adequately aroused.

Pain has randomly been an extremely fun additive to pleasure for as long as I can remember. I've received and given it with great results on many an occasion! I think it's quite common, though many are embarrassed to admit it.

Absolutely... I have em all the time

They are very normal usually the fantasy is better than the reality. The real pain should be given slowly and allow you to feel it as it increases you will either want more or beg the person to stop. Its all a matter of tolerance.

As posters have stated, define normal. I love having my ballsac stretched and my cock nibbled by my wife. I even like a spanking but not as much as she does.