Can an enema giver refuse to be an enema receiver?

First of all, I would mention that I don't believe that anyone should be forced into doing what they don't want to, whether it is giving, or receiving. Second, I would mention that I would willingly do either. But I would tend to disagree with Johnn's original premise that females tend to be the givers. Perhaps it is that the women who give are more likely to post (say, because they are more assertive, for example). I understand that he admitted that his survey was not scientific... Let me go out on an equally perilous limb: When I surveyed the 'Personal Ad's, I found that the females who were interested in 'receiving' far greatly outnumbered the ones who were interested in 'giving'. Now, of course, this could just be a reflection of a possibility that women who like to give don't need to advertise...

I think that there are many other factors which govern whether one will either post or advertise here, not the least of which is that this is a place, maybe the only place for many, where one can talk about such things. As for your personal situation, I think that it is something that one will never know for sure until they get to know their partner's preferences...

Oh, and given my observation of the ad's, I don't think you will have any trouble, Johnn, in finding a fit, and as long as both of you are satisfied with the state of things, there is nothing wrong with the ratio of give to receive being skewed either way... I don't believe it has to be a 'zero sum' game.

Happy Waterings,

Cos.

I agree with Ellesee, and quick to add that I mostly enjoy giving enemas, although I do like very much to have a woman give me a thorough, firm, full enema as she feels the need or desire to do so.

It is no secret that while I love to give, I hate to receive. I went to extreme lengths to avoid one during a hospital stay. I could have used one then too!

Sure, you can refuse, but is it good sportsmanship? It depends.

If the normal receiver has never had the experience of giving, and wants to try it just once, then it might be a little selfish to refuse.

If the receiver wants to change the relationship to half and half, you'd certainly be within your rights to refuse if it's not your thing.

JMHO.

Why does it matter? If you don't like receiving then don't receive. If don't like giving then don't. The two participants should communicate their likes and dislikes to each other. It all about having a good time. If both of you are just givers then you have a problem. If I had to choose which one I like most, it would be to receive but I don't mind giving enemas, too! We all have our different kinks. The key is to find other people with the same kink. I would like to find someone give me an enema while my husband watches but no takers here in deep south Texas.

Why does it matter? If you don't like receiving then don't receive. If don't like giving then don't. The two participants should communicate their likes and dislikes to each other. It all about having a good time. If both of you are just givers then you have a problem. If I had to choose which one I like most, it would be to receive but I don't mind giving enemas, too! We all have our different kinks. The key is to find other people with the same kink. I would like to find someone give me an enema while my husband watches but no takers here in deep south Texas.

If you've met and found others to play with doing MedFet, I'm surprised you can't find an enthusiastic enema giver for you. I'd be delighted to get to know you and be a candidate for your giver, especially if you're pretty vocal and demonstrative during your enemas, but I'm too far away. Reciprocation would be ideal as I love being a sub for enemas, but that might not interest you with your husband present.

Eric

Of course you can refuse. It just depends on who likes what. I enjoyed giving my exes enemas especially after my ex-wife confided that it was her lifelong most desired sexual secret. However, what I really like is being a sub and getting a very intense large, long submissive enema from my Domme ex. That wa the most exciting and rewarding.

Eric

It’s been pretty cut and dry for me over the years. If I was fortunate to find a female partner remotely interested in enemas, if she gave, I was grateful. If she wasn’t a fan of receiving, I never held that against her. It has been my experience woman do enjoy administering to men and not so keen on receiving. I feel whatever and whoever does what to whom irrelevant. Long as It is enjoyable and safe and each partner walks away respecting each others wishes.

My husband and I did for a time dabble some in foreplay enemas.

That was when I found out that he finds it sexually arousing just seeing me in Simms position. I had never thought of that as a sexually arousing position because all my "Goods" are basically hidden. But for some reason it works for him!

We had tried it like 6 or 7 times over 3 or 4 years, so it was far from every. time.

Last time was just over a year ago now.

At that time I told him, "Next time we do this it's YOUR turn to be on the receiving end!

Since then, He has avoided the subject entirely, but we have continued to try things!

Sure, you can refuse, but is it good sportsmanship?

As I said eleven years ago, I don't like to receive and will gladly give all of my enemas to my sub. That to me is the best sport I can be.

Enemas are a sexual waste of water on me. My sub gets a way better sexual thrill out if receiving. I'll play with his hard on as my pleasure

My husband and I did for a time dabble some in foreplay enemas.

That was when I found out that he finds it sexually arousing just seeing me in Simms position. I had never thought of that as a sexually arousing position because all my "Goods" are basically hidden. But for some reason it works for him!

Sims is sexy. Sure, things aren't "in your face" but it presents the curves in a very nice way. Never thought about it really until I walked in one day and my wife was lying down (fully clothed) in Sims and I realized just how sexy it was. Never had her in Sims nude though.

I like receiving from either male or female - just need someone who's dominate and likes giving.. However, I only like giving to women.... I know, it seems a bit one-sided in that regard, but just the way I'm wired..

Also, same way when it comes to a good spanking...

I can only judge from my own relationship and reading what others post, but I'd guess that men are more reluctant receivers than givers. Women are more accustomed to "being entered." We're used to the cramps and the rest of the discomforts of being female. I have to kick my husband to see our doctor. In our 34 years of marriage, the few times when he was sick and I felt that he should have an enema, sometimes it took some quiet screaming at him. He tells me it makes him feel better, but it's not his favorite pastime! However, at times when I've asked him to help me take one, no arguing there. He's a very caring guy, except if he's glued to his favorite Green Bay Packers on TV, can the enema wait till halftime?

I can only judge from my own relationship and reading what others post, but I'd guess that men are more reluctant receivers than givers. After all, women are more accustomed to "being entered."

I'm not sure if it is that but I just do not like them. Get a nozzle in my hand and a naked bottom and I am in hog heaven for sure.

I can only judge from my own relationship and reading what others post, but I'd guess that men are more reluctant receivers than givers.

I see plenty of men, on Zity.biz, ready and willing to take a nozzle up the ass. Especially if it is being held by the dainty hand of a lady. I even have a few who would be my "victims" if I would offer it to anyone outside of my husband/my sub.

I am not sure about men in the rest of the world. It isn't a topic that comes up in polite company.

Short answer: yes. Anyone can refuse anything sexual.

In ANY case, whether or not the giver also takes, it is important that the giver learn how to do it properly, but it isn't required that the "top be a bottom" to learn.

Personally, for me, I feel it kind of helps but it is not sufficient - I still need to learn how to work with someone else's body.

I prefer being the receiver as the giver. I have given enemas when time restraint did not allow me to receive one.

I can only speak from my own experience on this. I liked getting enemas from as early as I can remember and once I became aware some people used them as sex play I tried to get my new wife to try them. She said she never had an enema but with a considerable amount of persuasion (begging) she agreed to give them to me, and with even more persuasion she allowed me to give her a few. She said she just could not get into them because she was afraid of losing control and making a mess. So for a while she agreed to give them to me as long as she did not have to take one. Eventually she told me to just do it myself.

I am thinking that it is not so much the man receiving the enema from the girl being more common but the ratio of man to woman on Zity. I have met some nice men here for friends being an attention whore I like this. For first time enemas I think often it is the Mom doing it. For me it was the school nurse so again the woman not saying the man cannot be the Nurse Dont get the teeth out on me me for that. After the first time I just do it myself. I always have pooping troubles and I like them. The enema not the pooping troubles. I have had enemas from other women and from my Master Often . If what he does can even be called the proper enema. He also does enemas for healthy lifestyle things for himself. He will not let me give them to him. Another weird thing from his mind of monkeys. I do not even ask why any more of these things. I give the enema to other woman as well. It is becoming like a social club. Sometimes the man not often. O I have wandered a way from the topic. Whatever. Post.

@Bad_Princess, I like both, & I'm very much a Dominant. I give to women, like to receive from them. I think that many Doms/Masters believe that enemas are sub. I've seen a number of people online who hold this view. Or, I could be that your Master just doesn't like them. I once had an e-mate who would not receive from her boyfriend because he was sub, but she received from me. She started out very nervous --almost terrified, (I could see, because I had her bottoms up) but she was literally dripping wet.

You feel how you feel. Some people enjoy being on receiving some enjoy giving more than receiving and some enjoy both. I myself do enjoy both but enjoy receiving much much more. My wife enjoys giving much more so while I have only given her a handful of enemas she has given me a ton.

Would I like to give more often,sure but it's not that important and since she doesn't enjoy them as much as I do and me receiving is more important and she prefers giving it all works out for the best.

I don't mean to take the black and white approach here, but a person has the right to refuse anything. I understand the question, but the reality is that not everyone is into receiving an enema....or even giving them. I am married to a former nurse that is not into enemas at all. She will give them to me, but I can tell it is forced and I don't feel right asking her to do that. She is absolutely not into receiving them. Everyone is different, but don't ask someone to do something that they aren't comfortable with. Just my two cents.

YES

Nurses are taught enemas are gross long before the experience. have you seen those simulators they work on. yuk. I even find resusiannie creepy.

We are all different. One would prefer giving, the other one just receiving. According to my opinion it is good and fair to try both sides and find out what you like.

Of course a giver can refuse to be also a receiver. We are always talking about adults that respect each other's limits, so no one should ever even think that there should be any form of obligation.

Once this point is clear enough, I have to say that even though I feel to be more of a giver than a receiver, I find that a mutual session is definitely better than a one way session. I think that it is easier to play with someone with which you can exchange roles than otherwise.

As I have already written in some other posts, my partner and I play enemas very rarely and in those occasions I am pretty sure that he does more to make me happy than for his own pleasure. Also, in those occasion I am only the giver as he never reciprocated it.

The idea that such a play is not a real shared passion (and this could apply also in case someone who doesn't want to receive does it only to please the partner) makes the play way less enjoyable than it could be, in my opinion.

But again, this should never induce anybody to do things that he/she is not willing to do. A no should be heard as a no under all circumstances and accepted/respected for what it is.

It's about the difference between CAN and SHOULD

You CAN!

You should NOT!

Yeah, why not?

Sure they can. Find someone you find compatibility with. Thats best. Or settle on common interests. Divorces don’t happen to people who find common ground and compromise.

As a lover of getting enemas from men, I'm the reverse of this question - I'm a receiver who refuses to give to men... I wonder if my situation is the more common for men into same sex enemas - where we like to get, but not into giving.

After reading the original question I'm going to answer this question with a BIG NO! IF you enjoy giving enemas (specially watching your SO squirm, and stress from the enema), you should have to take your turn and be on the receiving end just as much. Fair is fair...

IF you disagree please read the original post. I think it will change your mind.