The fool that I am, was in a 30 year sexless marriage - my wife was not. She was smarter than me! The last 5 yrs I did finally jump the fence multiple times.
This is a great discussion where all the viewpoints are being brought out, but here is something dear to my heart that I hope will be considered. I really don't think we are being fair to ourselves.
Before I decided to pair-off with someone, I was hard at work deciding what I believed. I seriously doubt there were very many days when my beliefs did not change, at least to some degree.
Then I married. "What now?" I thought? Was I supposed to stop my philosophical inquiry, and quit learning from life? Or upon realizing that learning cannot be stopped, should I assume my wife is adjusting her beliefs also, and because we are married, she will somehow come to the same conclusions as I do, and we will continue to be a match made in heaven? Dubious!
WE ARE SHIPS PASSING IN THE NIGHT! Each on our own course, and we are fortunate that our course will take us across the paths of many others - but only for a brief time. We will find someone to share with at so many points in our life, but none of us should ever ask another person to give up their beliefs and their search for the truth, and adopt ours.
Marriage to one other person until death, is a cruelty to everyone. We can need; help, shack up, and even sacrifice for each other, but then move on to someone else that needs us when we are no longer a match.