What is the most unusual object you ever used - or still use - for a dildo?

Dildos have been used for thousands of years for both ceremonial and sexual purposes. Archeologists have discovered implements they believe were used as dildos in sites dating back to the late stone-age. These dildos were made from just about any material that could be fashioned into a phallic shape. Except for some of the more exotic ones - glass, steel, etc. - most modern dildos are usually pliable and much more lifelike than in times past. However, these modern materials eventually get stiff and crack or otherwise become unusable. If Wife and I are not playing doctor, a dildo is often the instrument of pleasure. Of course we add tongue, fingers, and vibrator to amplify the sensations but none of the dildos we have tried recently provide the same orgasmic intensity as some of the ones we used in the past. We have tried several different brands, styles, materials, etc. but have not found one to match the old "Mr Softee".

So my questions:

What is the most unusual object you ever used - or still use - for a dildo? What prompted you to use it?

Are there any suggestions for a good dildo sold in the US?

For unusual objects, we have used a baseball bat.

NOT the ball hitting end, we use the handle side. The Knobby end gives a great sensation both anally and vaginally.

BTW, my husband first sanded the bat very smooth, then coated it with a couple of layers of epoxy, making it glassy smooth and easy to clean. He even cut off most of the ball hitting end to make the length and weight more manageable. The actual length is about 24 inches.

When I am clean inside, I inject about half an ounce ( 0.5 Oz = 15 cc ) of lube and then I can insert the knobby handle end almost 14 inches lying on my side as I massage it in and out rubbing the knobby handle against my innards! It feels terrific.

I haven't visited here for quite a while for lack of privacy in my home but I'm free again and GOD I feel comfortable here with my fellow perverts! 😉 I once designed an eight inch hollow dildo from a shovel handle. It wasn't very comfortable but OHH what a feeling delivering the enema! Hmmm! Ball bat? Hmmm! Knobby end? >😄 I'm kind of surprised though that nobody here ever talks much about enema dildos. If I could find a custom toy-maker, I would design it like the Tantrus Intermediate Bend-Over only much thicker, like a butt plug, at the base. 😜 I would also have them make a hollow 2 1/2 inch silicone butt plug which is another item you can't find. To you fellow cucumber-lovers out there...try boring it out using a large Philips screwdriver and then slide a hose into it. My girlfriend REALLY gets me bucking and squirming, especially if it's been in the fridge! Squash work well too!

Jeff Stryker cock UR3– realistic dildo

I used a banana on my GF and ate it out of her...lots of fun....

Ive tried almost everything if its smooth enough ive probable tried it

I appreciate everyone's response and suggestions. One problem is that I live in one of the states that believes the government has the right to tell you what you can and can't do in your own bedroom - where they try to ban adult toys, movies, and similar items. Numerous internet retailers, including many of the more popular ones, will not ship here. Eventually, I found one that either was not aware of the ban or ignored the ban and shipped the stuff anyway. Wife now has a dildo, similar to the old "Mr. Softee", that makes her happy.

Suzy, you took my breath away when I read "baseball bat." After reading on and seeing the "handle side", it still made my imagination run wild. Thanks to everyone. This is a great forum.

On one particularly strange night, I slipped a condom over one peg of a four way lug wrench and slipped that into my ass. Not sure if it was standard or metric... I do remember it did the job quite well...

Lots of veggies. Zuccini, eggplant, cucumber, calabaza (don't know the right word in English)... not the Halloween ones but they are fat-penis-shaped. Oufff!!

Broom stick, a round deodorant tube, curling iron...those are what I can think of. Baseball bat is interesting...gotta try it!

While strolling thru a hardware store I saw a toilet plunger, black plastic, with a knob on the end of it much like the handle of a baseball bat. Right below the knob were several ridges similar to a "hand grip" on a bicycle. All those ripples and that knob, couldn't resist it. Now one of my fave toys.

A carved wooden dildo threaded onto the end of the threaded shaft of a vibratory brass tumbler. Literally couldn't see straight. It was like an 8 on the Richter scale!

Standard 6" regular cock-like Dildo with nuts, from one of the fun stores.

Weirdest??? Dunno, maybe a Banana, or cucumber is considered weird...tried both. 😉

Second hand dildo http://www.zity.biz/gallery/image/74895

Buttplug http://www.zity.biz/gallery/image/74896

btw the most unusual object I have ever used has to be an ice cream scoop handle - it was hard plastic, about 1 inch diameter by 4 inches long, with a nicely rounded end and the handgrip had lots of lovely ridges on it 😁 (this was used for anal insertion by the way)

Someone's soon to Dildo exploit "Solid Printers" as in :

http://www.shapeways.com/materials/strong-flexible

My favorite is the metal cone on top of a lava lamp. I can sit on it and bounce up and down. Haven't been able to get the lava lamp part in yet but working in it.

😮 Kryptonight420 (and anyone else reading the above) I would strongly advise you not to do this. If the lamp breaks - and it probably will - there is not only the potential for severe damage from sharp edges, but I also doubt very much that the fluids contained within the lamp are intended to be used internally.

The rubber handle of a shower stile squeegee.. golf ball..

Unusual objects?

A stone found in a shallow river. It was very smooth, oval shape, and I loved its weight. Unfortunately, that very weight caused me to drop it on the floor, so it cracked, the tile and the stone. The cracked tile was kind of difficult to explain.

Also tried all kinds of veggies; cucumbers, pickles, small eggplants, pepperoni. No bananas (I was told that when you buy it, all the larvae of the fruit flies are already in the bananas skin - it kind of make sense, after a few days there are fruit flies flying around, where there were none before, so they came with bananas).

Standard stuff found around the house: shampoo bottle. screwdriver handle.... although nothing beats the real toys. Enjoying the D. Johnson "Big end" very much lately.

Rubbermaid screwdriver I found at a Walmart. Shape is good with a rippled grip.

May U decide whats the most unusual object is/was cuz all my insertions r 'unusual'.

3 most unusual are: bicycle seat, rubber surfboard dog toy, newest addition: scuba fin.

im an adventurous guy ^^

Recently I used a cucumber and a zucchini up my ass. I quite liked it and I planning to try out more vegetables in the future.

A phone and a TV remote control. I think it's the rectangular shape that makes it feel good.

I used a snooker que once but only the end

How about one of those toilet brush handles with the enlarged butt plug looking end? It just cried out to be shoved up my butt though you have to be careful with the length.

I'm a mega nerd, so my boyfriend used my high end lightsaber as a dildo once. It was oddly hot as hell.

A pool noodle.

They come in different diameters, densities, and colors, can be cut to any length, very inexpensive, and are thick enough to carve into knobs, spirals, etc. I also like that they're soft, but firm, not hard like a bat or broom handle. Put at least 2 loops of 1/4" rope through the length of the noodle (no thinner than 3/16" or it'll slice through the noodle when you pull it), leave 12-18" extra for a wrist strap/pull cord, and cover the noodle with a condom or 2 (Trojan Extra Ribbed is my favorite). Hint: If you leave a condom on your noodle for a couple weeks, it will compress down a bit smaller and become more firm.

If a noodle is too big, you can start with foam pipe insulation. It comes in smaller diameters and is much softer and more flexible & compressible.

The most unusual object I can remember is a thick glass tube from an aquarium heater that broke. I pulled out the heating elements and ended up with a nice smooth and long object made of tempered glass, that was just about the same size as my own penis.

I was in high school at the time and it seemed like a good object to use. It brought me incredible orgasms many times, from the feeling of fullness and from rubbing the special spot I knew I had but didn't know it was called the prostate.

Thinking back, using glass may not have been smart, but it was strong and long and had a flare at the base, so in case it went too far, it wouldn't slip inside. I wish I still had that object!

Nerdy...all I can think of as I read this is Obi-Wan saying "use the force". 😉 You are definitely on the high end of sci-fi kinky!

I will have to say I've use the handle of a plunger, a handle of a screw driver, a cucumber, a brush handle mmmm I guess I like those handle. Where is that screw driver at.