Does Age Really Matter

@Lily1991 And just what age would be your upper limit?

@wet. You and are I are anxiously waiting for the answer to your question!

PS I am only 36x2!

It doesn't as long as you connect emotionally. I was always attracted to older women growing up. Now that I'm older I would go with younger if we had mutual interest and connection. And as long as you are both legal adults.

@WET and @Rigel

I think it would be 50 years old cause I feel like if the age gap is any bigger we won't have anything in common.

(PS. I hope I haven't offended anyone)

In a relationship, yes age matters to me. I prefer someone within 5-10 years my age. Can be younger or older in that range.

For a sexual playmate, not so much. What matters most is if their kinks match well with mine.

If I were looking, which I'm not, age would factor in some. It would be factored in with interests and beliefs. The general interests that start any relationship. Because their is more to a relationship than just sex.

"Emotionally, older men win hands down. They've been through things and lived to tell the story. They are more intelligent, more rational, more mature and much more interesting to talk to. I don't care if a penis lasts twenty minutes or two hours, but by God, when it's all said and done, I want someone who can hold a conversation. I have no need for boytoys in my bed. If I want to cum, I've got toys. If I want intimacy and fun, it's older men for me."

There are two things that I have always looked for in a guy: 1) Is he smart and interesting enough that we have something to talk about the next morning over breakfast, 2) knowing that women take much longer to arouse does he have the right techniques to do that. It might not take a genius to have sex, but doing it right also isn't for the average dummy. Fortunately, when I got married I found a guy who was good on all counts and we're still together.

Dear Emom.

I soooo hope I am the man you described. I am sixty-six. I went through a divorce back in 2006, did a lot of reflection, and then met the beautiful lady I am now married to in 2015. She tells me that she was immediately attracted to my good manners. So for the last eight years I have brought her tea and then breakfast in bed. We dance together, we cook together, we travel together, we garden together and we love together. Sex has never been so good. Lots of time, lots of lubrication, a beautiful bedroom and some delicious toys for him and her. Oh my goodness!! And only the other day she said "oh may this go on a long long time"

For me age does really matter and it matters in so many ways. When I have sex with my husband or my friend, they are in my age group and there are few physical limitations and we have a lot in common and we see each other daily. These times can be playful, spontaneous, as well as deep and emotionally satisfying because we have a connection and, again so much in common. They can be special moments or just for fun and a quick release or long and "meaningful" with different levels of intimacy. Being in the mood or on demand isn't a problem for them and you can feel their confidence and if you have the time, there can be more than once. 🌹🌹🌹 Even if you mistime getting yours with getting theirs, it doesn't take long for them to recover.

Older men can be just as fun and spontaneous but with them it is like getting a really good deal on an old comfy chair or them loaning you their favorite coat that has all of their scents on it and it feels "lived in" and has seen a lot of use. 😘 Older men, who care, know their limitations and are all about seeing that you "get yours" first and then you get them theirs. Old guys have an old timey saying about, "if you can't cut the mustard you need to know how to lick the jar". 😄 But that doesn't make sense to me because who wants to lick a mustard jar? 😄😄😄 But the old guy isn't talking about a mustard jar and tells you it is just a metaphor. AND they know what a metaphor is!!

Age really does matter but not as much as knowing and wanting to be with the guy you are screwing. 😉

One thing about older men, and I am one, is that generally older men are better lovers. We understand women and we understand that part of the fun of sex is enjoying the woman climax, hopefully several times. Many younger men just want to jump on and cum and don't really want to give the woman pleasure. For me, giving the woman pleasure, is important is my climax.

@WET and @Rigel

I think it would be 50 years old cause I feel like if the age gap is any bigger we won't have anything in common.

(PS. I hope I haven't offended anyone)

@Lily1991 No worries - certainly not feeling offended here. I was kidding when I asked the question. While I really enjoy looking at younger women - and even fantasize and joke about having an affair, I've no interest in stepping out - especially with someone significantly younger than me. I would agree that age matters in a relationship - sexual or otherwise. My wife is 9 years younger than me and I seriouslly doubt she was attracted to me because of my age or advanced (joke????joke) maturity some 40 years ago. We just clicked and had a lot in common in and out of the bedroom. Plus our age difference wasn't that great. I have connected as friends with several younger women- but I suspect, in many cases, there would be a significant gap between our interests that would interfere with a serious sexual/emotional relationship.

My misogynistic view is that younger women who are attracted to old men - are more interested in the $$$.

@Rigel

I'd have to disagree with you about younger women being attracted to older men cause of $$$ cause that's not always true.

Money isn't everything (at least in my opinion) I like someone older than me and what attracted me to him wasn't money at all it was how kind, caring and trustworthy he is.

And even if Elon Musk himself told me he likes me and I don't like his personality then it's a big NO for me.

@Lily1991 You’re right and I stand corrected! While some women are gold diggers ( those are the ones you read about), many are attracted to older partners based on love and desire. I exposed a bias/prejudice that wrongly groups many women (and men) based on the actions of a few.

@Rigel

Those few are the ones that makes you think that any agegap relationship is based on money unfortunately 😕.

I think the most important point in this thread is why would you be watching dr.phil. 😃 In regard to age the only relevance it has is between the people in the relationship. We are all wired differently and sometimes and that often determines whether we are attracted to partners that are younger, older or even the same age. I'm certainly no one to judge nor should others.

I can't really say if age matters. I can only reflect on my own experiences. Being 'young' (22), I have always been drawn to older men because of their intellect and their worldly and sexual experience. I have had a few FWB and a couple of very short lived relationships with guys my own age but both types left me wanting. I've had 2 really good relationships with 'older' men, one 35 and my current relationship with a 53 yr old man. Our relationship is all that I could hope for but I don't know what the future holds. For a serious relationship I can see myself attracted to a man 60 yrs or younger. I say that now but again, what lies in my future?

I don't think this has a yes or no answer. We're all different and individuals. We all want/need something/s different from a relationship. And those of us with kinks have more boxes to check. Finding someone where there is enough chemistry, compatibility, to build and sustain a relationship is what "matters" i think.

For some, age is an important factor, to others it's not. i have a FB i've had since the beginning of the pandemic in 2020. He contacts me a couple of times a week and wants to breed me. He's a 27 year old Latino Muscle Guy, almost 40 years younger. i don't push, never initiate. It took me some time to get past my conditioned age response. We meet need/desire in each other. i don't specifically seek out younger men, i don't know if He purposely likes and older man. He's Bi and says i'm the only guy He's been with. Idk, i take Him at face value and truly appreciate Him and what we have. i guess one could say age is a factor, but it's not the sole factor.

Age doesn't matter in my book what matters is where both of each others heads are at.

I can't get my own comment out of my head. I didn't always think this way or atleast didn't know that I did, until I too became older.

Most of the younger guys, especially my age, well... I'll just say: I like the lectures, medical advice, and the scoldings. 😉😊

I do bare bottom spankings if you need one.

At my age I doubt I'll find an older woman to teach me but I wish I could have had one when I was a dumb teen.

Hmmm.

When i was barely 18, not a virgin i met a man (David) who was about 6 years older. He became my my first real lover who taught me so much about my body and also, looking back, D/s relationships. He was a text book Dom, long before i really knew anything about that kink, but took to it like a duck to water. This is what i was looking.

Before that i had only been with men/ boys of my own age. Sex was, well exciting because it was sex and it was forbidden fruit, but that is about it. It was fun but not mind blowing. David taught me about my body, gave me multiple orgasms, fisting, oral, anal, etc. He left no stone unturned. Older than me, he was still young enough to have great stamina

At 17 years old, before David, there was a man in my home town who pursued me, he was 22 years my senior. I of course rebuffed his advances. (This was at a time when the laws changed and they allowed women into mens taverns and local bars. My friends and i started hanging around the local bars so he thought i was at least 21.)

About 2 years after i broke up with David, Vinny started to pursue me once again. I was 22 or 23. He was relentless and i finally caved. He treated me like a queen. But before Vinny and after David i dated a bit. Sex was very vanilla, although i did teach a young man 10 years my junior and that was fun, the same age men were very much into themselves. Mind you, my needs were taken care of, but the sex was more gymnastics, which was great but different. How many times could he get hard in one night. All fun.

But Vinny, a super fit 40+ year old, he was concerned about me and my body. Learning every nook and cranny, every curve, every valley, every fold. He got into my head as well, he would push me to do things or do things to him in partially public places, we stealthily (and nerve wracking) had sex on a public beach under a blanket. He brought an entire nother level to sex. His approach was similar to David's, very Dom-like. They both were patient in exploring my body, but reached into my mind as well.

Younger men have their place and stamina. Being active in my local kink community has broadened my horizons on age. I do not have sex with anyone but my husband, but the younger men are very interested in me when i go to the dungeon. (I'm 66) Most participants are 40 years and up to 80, a few might be in their 30s. The older men, my age and up have a maturity and i like them to play with me. There is one man who i have known for about 4 years, i play with, who is 50 and he does not care about my age nor i care about his. Once you get to know a person their age does not seem to matter as much as long as you have something in common with them. Although, if they are too young (for me) under 40, i feel like their grandmother. Lol. And i am done mentoring.

Edit: Depending on what age you are, each age and experience or expertise of the man is key. I have been with younger men who amazed me. And some younger men who i mentored (or seduced,) Men my own age that were amazing. And older men who will always have a place in my soul. They each came into my life at the right time.

Interesting thread. When I was in the hospital for my first knee replacement I became acquainted with a nurse, actually the head nurse at the time, who was 30 some years my junior. This was my first and so far only experence with the age phenomena. It was very gratifying.

She and I got along very well in the hospital and I got her email address and we became Facebook friends. She would send me messages suggesting we meet at Starbucks which we did. It was all very pleasant and I got the impression I was being pursued. It might have been my imagination. Then the covid pandemic hit and the Starbucks meetings ended because she could not risk, her being a nurse. Then during the pandemic, I grew a beard. A very first for me. When things started improving with the pandemic I told her about what I referred to as my covid growth. Things immediately cooled off. I don't know what my attraction was but maybe I reminded her of someone in her past and with the growth that went away.