Men having sex with men as we get older

I have just turned 69. From my early boyhood to mid teens I got many enemas from mom and knew I was anal erotic. But considered myself “straight” until the last few years. I was first married at 21 and divorced ten years later. Married again 21 years ago to a great woman. Our sex life has been good but she doesn't share my anal eroticism. 5 years ago we were on vacation at a resort in Mexico. While my wife went to the spa, I decided to have a massage from the resort masseur. Everything was going as expected. I was laying face down on the table and suddenly I felt something massaging my asshole. When he tried to insert his finger I tensed up. With his thick Mexican accent he said “Relax, don't you want a prostate massage?” Well, my asshole relaxed, his finger slid in and I was in heaven. This was the first time another man touched me there other than my doctor. He never tried to give me a “happy ending” or anything else. But I was so turned on when my wife got back to our room we had the most incredible sex than we've had in a long time.

We have houses both in LA and Palm Springs. My wife still works full-time in LA and I spend frequent time alone in Palm Springs. One day last year I was doing some yard work and had a really sore back. I was speaking with our neighbor and he gave me a masseur recommendation and to tell him he sent me. I called and he showed up with his table later that day. He asked me lie face down on the table. The further along he got, the more sensual it became. Finally I could feel his short beard brushing my butt cheeks. Then I felt is tongue on my hole. This was the first time anyone had done this to me and it felt incredible. Then he continued the massage by climbing on top of me using his whole body to massage my back. Then I felt something poking at my butt. I told him no, that was enough, I didn't want to be fucked. He had me turn over to finish the massage and my penis was hard as a rock. He put oil on my dick and finished off the massage with a very happy ending. I had an incredible orgasm. Another first. No man had ever touched my penis other than my doctor before. When I saw my neighbor the next day he asked me with a big smile on his face if his masseur took good care of me. I called the massage guy again and let him finally penetrate me. It took quite a bit of patience to get it in but it felt fantastic. Another first. I was sure to give him a big tip.

So, I guess my question is why it took me so many years to consider any type of M/M play? Perhaps it was just the societal taboos in my brain. Now that I've got far fewer tomorrows than yesterdays, I've got many less inhibitions. I just wish I hadn't wasted so much time exploring this side.

I was in my late 30's in a sexless marriage; it was falling apart. I was on craigslist looking to have an affair, 20 years with my ex and never cheated but I was willing at this point. I stumbled in the various listings and ventured in the ff, mmf, ffmm, and mm categories and I noticed that as I red the various adds for mm and saw all the pics of cocks out there that I started to get horny. I thought to myself, what are you doing, your not gay; you love pussy! And it's true, I do love pussy. A few days later I was looking at porn, straight porn, and once again, curiosity got the best of me and I peeked into the gay porn and once again, I got horny! This was actually kind of freaking me out a little and I thought something was wrong with me and I shut it down. I thought how could I enjoy this I'm straight.

Well months past and on occasion I would look at the various ads and fantasize and by this time, I'm now separated and living on my own. It took me months, maybe a year or so before I finally built up the courage to answer an ad for a sensual massage. And even after responding it took some time before I felt comfortable enough to go to his place for a massage. When I finally got there, he had a beautiful home and in his master bedroom he had a professional massage set up, relaxing music, candles, I mean it looked like I was in a hotel. I got undressed and on the table and he went to work with a very nice massage; I was still very nervous and didn't really know to expect or what would happen. He slowly made his way to my ass and massaged my cheeks, then he spread them and I could feel his tongue; God it was the best feeling and I got rock hard.

He did this for a little bit then had me turn over. My dick was so stiff and he just started going down on me. It felt really good, but not like other blow jobs that I've had in the past; this blow job had scruff and it felt good. He got up and I looked at his cock, and for the first time in my adult life I went down and sucked his cock. It wasn't my first cock as I played as a kid, but chalked that up to childhood play. We came on each other and I remember thinking that this was one of the hottest things I had ever done. I played with him a few more times he would play with my ass and I would top him. I eventually built up the courage to answer a few more ads, and before the year was up I had both topped and bottomed for guys and I still loved pussy. It took me a year or so to finally utter the words, I'm bisexual. I do get a little sad that I suppressed this side of me for so long and missed out on some great experiences, but at least I was still pretty young when I did discover my bisexuality and I'm in my early 50's, so there is still plenty of time.

Nicely recounted, @Proximo . Hot!

I was in my late 30's in a sexless marriage; it was falling apart.

I'm bisexual. I do get a little sad that I suppressed this side of me for so long and missed out on some great experiences, but at least I was still pretty young when I did discover my bisexuality and I'm in my early 50's, so there is still plenty of time.

@Proximo that sucks when you're in your late 30's, and alreafy your marriage was sexless. At least mine didn't go south until my later 40's.

I'm also very sad that i didn't “make myself more available” to a few certain men in my younger years, although I've come to terms with the fact that i just wasn't ready. I'm actually in the process of writing an erotica story, based on my experiences with a few of them, a “what if” I did connect with them later in life….

I once said never too.

Bunch of BS, as found many are on my page.

I once said never too.

Bunch of BS, as found many are on my page.

I couldn’t say this any better!

At 79 years old, I still don't feel any attraction to other males.

I'm gonna be in my 50s in a few months and I'm still not attracted by any men. I consider myself 100% straight.

If I really have to answer to “what type of sex could you have with an other man ?”, I'd say being masturbated by a man or having my cock sucked by a man. But nothing more.

I had always been with women until I got older. Then I found it easier to find men to have sex with then women. I started out as a top. Then do you age and what not I didn't get hard enough anymore. So I started to bottom and even though I still love women and can do oral with them I have to admit I love being a bottom. I am not attracted to men I'm attracted to sex with them. I love servicing men. I love m2m sex. I enjoy being submissive. Thats that.

I'm not attracted to most men but I increasingly find the idea of sexual relationships with women too likely to get more complicated than I want. So often I think just having some no strings attached play with other men is better than being bored. But I would prefer anything to involve pretty androgenous men without excessive body or facial hair. I would like to someday get ass fucked or pegged to orgasm. I also think it would be fun to have someone cum on my belly when it's swollen with holding a large enema.

I've just turned 70, been divorced for many years, and other than masturbation have had very few sexual encounters since then. I would have never thought of having sex with another man in the past, but recently I am finding myself masturbating to videos or photos of men masturbating or fucking. It is becoming so fascinating to me that I am now craving being fucked by a man, or giving a blowjob to a nice big cock. I can't believe it , but it is true.

@KennyT Yeah! Ain't it great!

This seems like an appropriate place to post this.

This is supposed to be humor! I got to laughing at myself and thought I would share it - just to see if it is communicable like yawning.

Have you noticed, that many people who consider themselves "straight", appear to be more homophobic than straight? I say that because they volunteer overly emphatic responses to imagined accusations. "I'm very straight but…" I'm not criticizing, I'm empathizing. THAT person used to be me.

If I was in a group discussion and the subject of sexuality was broached - meaning that someone had raised the spectre of homosexuality living among us - inappropriate responses would abound. People would start declaring how straight they were. I was among them. Many of us would loudly proclaim our "innocence" without our ever having been accused or questioned.

But surely I was justified in my declaring I was straight, since I had never had sex with another man? The fact that I had wanted to suck dick since I was fifteen didn't alter the fact that I hadn't. So if I had lived the life of a straight man, shouldn't I claim the title?

(It's a miracle that homophobic men can even bring themselves to shake hands. Let's make it a little easier on them by changing our handshake greeting from "Hello" to "I'm very straight".)

Well now that I am too old to care what other people think of me, and especially since I no longer have a spouse that would make my life a living hell if I gave the "wrong" answer, let me declare loud and clear, for all the world to hear:

I am an extreme oral and anal erotic exhibitionist that loves Cock, Cum, and Cunt! (Not necessarily in that order) And fuck anybody that doesn't approve!

BTW: Doesn't refusing to include half the population in your social activities seem rather prejudiced and discriminatory? So in the future, everyone must be bisexual. ;-)

Addendum: I once said that rather than call myself Hetero, or Homo, or Bi; I would just call myself Sexual - but now, I think I will just call myself 'Free'.

I would totally enjoy having a masturbation buddy. It's funny, I did that in my youth, and now I am coming full circle.

I just don't know how to go about finding someone to masturbate with.

There are arguments that everybody - including many animals - are bisexual. Just that society, parental influence, religion etc has taught us to suppress it. So it shouldn't be surprising that it manifests later in life when there is less risk of job/peer pressure/sexual partner options etc.

Having thoughts about same sex activities isn’t all that unusual, it doesn’t make you bisexual or gay. Many folks fantasize about going into space - but they aren’t astronauts. Once you physically do it— then you’ve done a homosexual act and you’re at least bi-curious if not bisexual/gay (or an astronaut).

Being gay or bisexual has a societal stigma associated with it that mostly straight people don’t want to admit. But there’s really nothing wrong with it (IMHO).

@Rigel I agree with you.

I have told friends for twenty years that we are all born bisexual but social pressures usually restrict us to “normal” sexuality. They were not eager to agree.

I have no doubt that we mostly just follow scripts written by our parents. Especially when we are busy working and raising a family. When you get past that, you have time to question all your beliefs.

Unfortunately, by then your kids are gone and are using the beliefs you taught them before you did your “rethink”. I'm beginning to think that children should always be raised by grandparents. :-)