How do women want to be fucked and are virgin women over-rated?

The first thing that I ever did that could be considered 'kinky' was gag a fucking whiny shit of a 'man' who wouldn't stop whimpering about how much he loved me during sex. I just grabbed the nearest piece of fabric (my panties) and stuffed his mouth so I didn't have to listen to that BULLSHIT anymore.

lol!

@Dahiana said, 'If we fucked it would be because I knew you well enough. You would have to be a friend. You would have to earn my trust. And if I let myself go with you, to be fucked by you, it would be all out.'

You are a 'quality piece of ass' and you are wise to fuck only friends and people you trust. But there is such a thing as being on the same 'level' as the one you fuck or who is fucking you. Some of us older gals have been there and done that and when we get into a serious fuck with each other, we want to fuck and not teach.

That might anger you to hear that but as @JR3 may have been alluding to, is that she wanted to fuck like an animal (my paraphrase and apologies @JR3) and not be feeling 'tender' at the time. Confidence and knowing your self worth as you do @Dahiana as well as your sincerity and eagerness is what makes you very very attractive and very fuckable. 🌹 Someone saying that you might not know where they are coming from when they lay out the possible ramifications for you, isn't an insult. It could be an 'invitation' to learn.

I don't know about you or anyone else, but I have a lot to learn and there are people here who know all about what they want and have paid their dues. I totally believe you when you said you meant every word. Be careful what you wish for and I know because I've been 'taken to school' a few times myself when I was younger. 😃 No, I am not always the brightest crayon in the box.

I only fuck friends too, but the friend I fuck has to want to learn OR be on the same level as I am OR teach this old dog new tricks.

I dont mean to go off subject and disrupt this thread but for me even the wildest most intense fucking must have more than a purely physical connection.

I dont mean to go off subject and disrupt this thread but for me even the wildest most intense fucking must have more than a purely physical connection.

I think a lot of us are right there with you and your way of thinking. 😃

@Ms_Lila said, "... Some of us older gals have been there and done that and when we get into a serious fuck with each other, we want to fuck and not teach.

That might anger you to hear that ..."

I am not angry and I understand what you are saying, @Ms_Lila. I was not challenging @SwitchableSusie on her observation that I may not know what she was referring to and to what extent "anything" could entail. No, I am not stupid and as she has demonstrated and written many times and as she herself has "been there done that" I have got to trust that she knows what she is talking about, no doubt. I was trying to say that, with a friend who I feel comfortable enough to "fuck with abandon and no boundaries" would have my complete trust. There are some who have told me I am as a "meat axe" when it comes to how I communicate, sometimes.

Well, okay, I've read my posts again. Maybe, just maybe @Ms_Lila, I could have written that a little better. Or maybe inserted an emoji as has been suggested to me by someone else. 😳

I think I'll quit here. 😕

make me feel like I belong to you to do as you please, make me gasp, make me moan!

😉

Tonight I gave her just such a fucking! 😁

Needless to say we both enjoyed it immensely!

Sorry ladies, I couldn't resist. Now back to your regularly scheduled thread.

I realize @SwitchableSusie, that you will probably need to remove this reply, so no worries. LOL

Fn

Jumping back to the original question. My husband travels a lot so I often don’t see him for 4-6 weeks at a time. By the time we get together I don’t want to spend a lot of time talking! Yank my clothes off, throw me on the bed and let’s go! I want to know just how much he’s missed me by how unable he is to control himself! There will be time later for the cuddling and the kissing (or the spanking and the pegging!) Shut the door, bend me over the sink, grab my hips, and pound so hard you rattle my teeth! Quick is fine, almost necessary because typically one of us just got off an airplane and is probably stiff and a little worn out but that first one needs to be a little primal 😃

...we want to fuck and not teach.

That might anger you to hear that but as @JR3 may have been alluding to, is that she wanted to fuck like an animal (my paraphrase and apologies @JR3) and not be feeling 'tender' at the time.

@Ms_Lila hit the nail on the head with that.

Yes, it can be great fun to introduce a new part of kink, or try something you read about and learn together with your partner, but I did not sign up to draw a fucking map to my clit, or to tell you which hole to put it in!!!

There are certain expectations I have, and I'm quite alright telling you to get the fuck out if you don't meet them. I'm not going to sit down for a study session and explain the answers to you all the time.

I have a friend who I fuck on regular basis this just a physical relationship. It's the kind where we rip each other's cloths off and go for it. Where with my wife we make love she prefers the cuddling and kissing kind of sex which is wonderful. Every now and then my wife will step out of the box like the other morning after a night of love making she came to the door to kiss me goodbye as I was leaving for work. She reached down and grab my crotch she was only wearing a nightshirt I knew what she wanted so right there on the stairs I pulled up her shirt and fucked her it was quick and very satisfying for both of us. This was very unusual for her. My wife is aware of my fucking session and gives her approval I have with our friend as she is a mutual friend. We don't hide anything from her in fact I invite her to come. I hope one day she will come and join us for a good fucking session.

@JR3 said, 'Yes, it can be great fun to introduce a new part of kink, or try something you read about and learn together with your partner, but I did not sign up to draw a fucking map to my clit, or to tell you which hole to put it in!!!

@JR3 I think that you make a point here that is right on topic. My husband and I know each other very well and so when we want to fuck just to fuck, I know he is going for 'his' and I am going for 'mine'. Because in my opinion there is a lot of selfishness in fucking just to fuck. My husband knows I love him and so I don't have to worry as much about how he will feel about it when I just fuck him. He knows I love him. Likewise, when he wants to fuck me because he wants to fuck, I'm very much OK with that. I'm thinking, '... use me because I will use you when I want mine ...' And he knows I love him.

The women I fuck are much the same way in a lot of respects. My first and longest relationship with a partner was Sarah, we both 'lost our virginity' to each other as far as other women go. We were pretty exclusive to each other in the regard of woman to woman and my only 'complaint' was that she was very traditional in the sense of sex. The more I grew and with my husband, I wanted to get more adventurous and my husband was right there with me wanting the same thing. Sarah not so much. Sarah and I didn't have many 'spontaneous fuck sessions' and there was always that need growing in me. She didn't appreciate it when I tried to talk to her or say to her, '... don't you just want to fuck sometimes?' Only I didn't say 'fuck', that word is fast becoming one I am very comfortable with.

These days I 'only' fuck a couple of other women regularly whenever I can. One is an old friend I grew up with and it hasn't been all that long that I found out that she can switch sides. Just as a note, at first I thought that a 'switch' was someone who could go either way on the gender that they fucked. Live and learn. 😉 This friend wasn't all that experienced in fucking other women but when she was going down on me I was thinking that she knew her way around a pussy. 😉 😁 Our relationship took a turn for the 'OH WOW' and since she is close and available, we both fuck. 😉

Another woman I have had the pleasure of being with was someone who was curious about being with a woman. She was younger than me and somewhat experienced but women weren't her main attraction. She was curious and I gladly relented and more or less helped her perfect her moves. She became quite good at it and progressed to the point where we were beginning to 'just fuck'. But up until that time, no slight towards her, she got me so hot for another woman that I went to my friend and just fucked her for all I was worth.

The younger woman and I still occasionally have sex and have even fucked just to fuck a couple of times. But she has found that while pussy is nice, she prefers the feel of a penis. And that is all well and good in my book 😃 and all the best to her.

So in keeping with this thread, I'd have to say that if you want to fuck, fuck someone with experience. Because to get someone to where you want to be able to fuck them, you will have to teach, as in 'virgins', and when you just want to fuck or be fucked , a virgin is not the answer. I don't want to come off sounding like some 'old pro' because I am not, as evidenced by me not clearly understanding 'switch', but I absolutely do know that I love to fuck and be fucked. And when that need to fuck or be fucked hits me, I'm in a fucking mood and the one I'm fucking had better be prepared to be used the way I want to use them, however wild that may get. 😈

Because at that point, I'm not going to apologize to the one I fuck or am fucked by for what we or I did to each other.

Unless the cops are called. 😉

Ms Lila said

My husband and I know each other very well and so when we want to fuck just to fuck, I know he is going for 'his' and I am going for 'mine'. Because in my opinion there is a lot of selfishness in fucking just to fuck. My husband knows I love him and so I don't have to worry as much about how he will feel about it when I just fuck him. He knows I love him. Likewise, when he wants to fuck me because he wants to fuck, I'm very much OK with that. I'm thinking, '... use me because I will use you when I want mine ...' And he knows I love him.

. . . and that was exactly my intention in my early posts in this thread.

When you love each other and fuck each other, it's different from fucking friends with benefits or making love. The sex can be great in any of the three circumstances, but each partner should know the mindset of the other to avoid hurt feelings.

Susie, I agree 100% with you hurt feeling in any party is not going to be good.

@SwitchableSusie - . . . and that was exactly my intention in my early posts in this thread.

When you love each other and fuck each other, it's different from fucking friends with benefits or making love. The sex can be great in any of the three circumstances, but each partner should know the mindset of the other to avoid hurt feelings.

Ever since you wrote this powerful little blurb - I've been thinking about it and the original question 'How do women want to be fucked and are virgin women over-rated'. Aside from the obvious - attractions of 'just fucking' I think there is more to fucking and being fucked and your little blurb screams this obvious fact. I think of words like - comfort level, familiarity, approachability, but fucking comes back to love for me.

I have had sex - with quite a few men in my time, not fucked, but had sex. I knew all of them - they were friends to some degree, and for whatever reason, or circumstance, I had sex with them. I did not fuck them - I had sex with them, and it was anywhere from 'OH WOW' 😁 to 'meh' 😕 and everything in between. It was sex - not fucking for the most part. I've never had the occasion - as you have written elsewhere @SwitchableSusie to be somewhere to do a lot of sex, but I think you referred to it as fucking. You'll have to forgive me - but I can't seem to find that exact thread, or post of yours where you talked about having sex with men, and I'm not even sure if I'm even doing justice to your tone or expression during that post.

So to help my itty bitty brain - and help myself wrap my heart around this thread, I am having to rethink how I define, 'making love' 🌹 , 'having sex' 😃 , and 'fucking' 😈 . I can't think of the three - the same way anymore, thank you - or - curse you @SwitchableSusie 😃

For right now - I'm defining, for myself, that making love is exactly what it means, making love with someone you adore and have deep feelings for, and who sees you at your best and worst and still loves you anyway. You make love with those people - they are there for you. You catch yourself - feeling warm and fuzzy hours, days, months, years later of how making love with that special someone made you feel and that you hoped you made them feel the same way about you. You care about them - you care about their feelings. And maybe he hit that - 'spot' and you found yourself devouring him because he is the one you trust to see you completely losing it. It's at the point where - making love turns into fucking, in my mind. 🙄

Having sex - that was when me and the one I was with agreed to have sex, good or bad, satisfying or maybe just sex, with or without a lot of emotional attachment. It was something I wanted at the time - and I'm glad I did it with them. I keep thinking - of the word 'nice' to describe sex overall, and I may or may not have screamed in ecstasy when I was kicking out the dome light of his pickup truck. I may even have held back a little - it was 'just sex' and I'm not sure I want word getting out that I'm a screamer. 😉 And maybe describing it to a girl friend the next day - 'it was just sex and it wasn't bad' and what did you think of Samantha's shoes? While you might care about them - you might say something like, 'yeah, that was good', smile to yourself, and then go back paying the bills.

But as I got older - and absolutely since I've came here, fucking has become a whole different thing for me. I've got to have that emotional - and animal connection with the one that you trust seeing the real you unleashed and uncensored. It's the one that knows you - loves you, and gets you and understands that sometimes, at any given moment, you are just a fucking sex fiend hell bent on getting hers and wants it right there and right then, and there's nothing refined or delicate about it one tiny little bit. It's that time - when I have one thing on my mind and only that one I want to fuck gets to see me that way. 🌹 They earned that right - and you wouldn't have it any other way. 😃

And with the full understanding - that even if you are paying the bills and trying to balance the check book, you might feel his hands all over your boobs, down in your bra, breathing down your neck, and taking whatever you might be wearing off, and there you are, hoping that neither one of you cums all over the top of the table or desk where you are writing out the checks, because, honey, I'm being fucked. Call you back later - maybe. 😈

I think - I know I need to redefine fuck and sex. In my mind and heart - they no longer are the same.

Thanks for the very clear headed posting Lora. You are so right and i admit i had really never separated the 3 before but there is a difference between fucking and sex. i would place sex in the same category as masturbation and often not as satisfying (my fingers dont need directions)., while fucking is not merely an animal connection. As humans we have an emotional connection.

@Lora_C said, "So to help my itty bitty brain - and help myself wrap my heart around this thread, I am having to rethink how I define, 'making love' 🌹 , 'having sex' 😃 , and 'fucking' 😈 . I can't think of the three - the same way anymore, thank you - or - curse you @SwitchableSusie 😃 "

I think I may need to think about my definitions, too.

@Lora_C

To me, having sex is synonymous with fucking. Making love is different. Making love doesn't have to be sweet and gentle. It can be hard and furious.

You can make love and fuck or have sex at the same time.

It is best when they occur together.

For myself, the sex, depending on the person can be anywhere from amazing to mediocre but the orgasm is always fantastic because I want it that way. I make sure that happens because people are or at least should be responsible for their own orgasms. It is a person's responsibility towards him/herself when having sex of any type.

@SwitchableSusie said, "I make sure that happens because people are or at least should be responsible for their own orgasms. It is a person's responsibility towards him/herself when having sex or any type."

I've seen something like what you said written by others here on Zity.Biz, too. I'm just beginning to get that idea for myself, and I think it might take some pressure off of me and my husband. If I am making sense.

I am usually very concerned about seeing that Tanner "gets his" and I might "lose mine" because I'm worrying about it. I can see sex and fucking being the same, and that sex and/or fucking can be done at the same time as making love.

I'm 33 and some of this thinking is news to me. How long have you all known about it? I'm not sure what I'm asking.

For me with my sex life I think having sex and fucking are really the same and making love is a bit different.

I have just had my husband in my sex life, nobody else though so I have not got experience of having sex with anybody just for sex without any emotions. Fucking is when I lust after my husband and I want his body, I want an orgasm from him and I want to give him an orgasm too. I love him and everything about him but lust just takes me over. Making love though has got a lot of lust but I think it starts a bit slower and it builds up and maybe takes a longer time until one of us has orgasms. It just comes from my love for him and I want to show him what I am feeling with my body.

A first date, in our 40's: meeting at lunch. Second: a long walk/talk in the park, plus an invite to her house in 3 days. Casual making-out on her couch. Quickly discovered she was bra-less. Then says "upstairs." I slipped her panties off, and starting licking away. When I hit the right button, she said "fuck me!" Not "make love to me" or "I want you inside." Nope: "Fuck me!" (do the math)

In most other countries fuck seems to be just another word meaning sex and they wonder why we should find it a bad term. I have noticed that in today's world that seems to be diminishing rapidly. Many girls I know use it quit liberally but with caution in front of me until they find I'm OK with it. Presumably due to my age they think I may not like the word. My son and his wife use it in normal conversation at our dinner table much to my wife's dismay.

I have thought of sex is like math, you add the bed, subtract the clothes, divide the legs, and pray you don't multiply like the one nightstand. I am going to have to rethink my definitions after read the posts one here.

I remember when Pam and I had a very jealous little three year old daughter who did everything possible to keep us from fucking. Even when Pam and I just tried to snuggled up together on the couch to watch a movie, our daughter became mad with jealously. She would climb up on the back of the couch, drop down between us, and try to push us apart. Our five year old son never gave us any trouble like that.

Pam and I mainly liked morning sex, and our jealous little daughter, always a very early riser, seemed to know we were fucking a lot of mornings, and she went on a determined campaign to stop us. I'm certain that when she heard morning noises inside our bedroom, she hated what we were doing together because it didn't include her. She sat down outside our bedroom door, banged on the door, and screamed for us to stop and open up until we did. No amount of punishment seemed to stop her from doing this. Pam and I had to learn to fuck early, fuck hard, and fuck fast, or not fuck at all.

If we're not doing something kinky, I usually prefer tender, slow and easy sex. I guess you'd call that lovemaking. It's lovemaking if that means caring more about Pam's pleasure than my own. Pam has wild orgasms very easily, so I enjoy going slow and giving her many explosive orgasms until she's exhausted after 20 minutes. I just try hold on, (as in keeping her from bucking me off), and I try not to cum too soon. Pam, however, often wants something completely different. She just wants me to take her like an animal would, to fuck her hard, rough, and fast, to almost rape her like I care only about my own pleasure and don't care at all about hers or even whether I hurt her or not. I thought this might be Pam's longing for our early days with preschoolers at home when we had to fuck fast or not at all. Now from reading this discussion, it's obvious that a lot of women, not just Pam, love to be taken and fucked roughly. I never realized that.

The first inkling I got that Pam liked a fast, rough fuck was one day when we were tenderly making love, or so I thought, and Pam started slapping my butt with her hand and telling me to speed up. She ended up really bringing the animal out of me by slapping me over an over as hard as she could and yelling, "faster, faster, faster!" until I finished in wild frenzy and collapsed. The sub in me loved being controlled that way. Soon after the master in me started enjoying roughing Pam up when she wanted it. I put her in bondage, or I immobilized her by forcefully pinning her wrists to the bed, and then I really pounded her while she was totally helpless, almost like raping her. I was surprised how much Pam enjoyed the rough treatment. She still does when she's in the mood.

I started making a lot of homemade leather bondage gear and body harnesses to use on Pam, and for her to use on me. Pam asked me to make her some small leather whips and floggers. I did, and she's been enjoying using them on my backside during sex ever since. She literally wore out the nine leather thongs on the first flogger I made for her. These days when Pam and I are in bed and she grabs a flogger, (or her new ridding crop from Tractor Supply), I know that regardless of what I want it's not going to be anything close to slow, tender, lovemaking.

I wish I had read this thread about 50 years ago. You women, and your honesty, are great. I always thought it was just guys that wanted to fuck while women wanted to be made love to. I suspect it was the era (50s and 60s) during which I was young.

>Are virgin women overrated? (spelling corrected to pass the Susie test)

Yes, they are. Only one data point here, however. The ex, age 18 at the time (I was 20). Kind of just laid there, although I did make her cum orally before hand. It was painful for her. Blood all over the damn place, glad I wore a condom although the towel we put down was obviously ruined.

And for those of you 'traditionalists' who think marrying a virgin is the ideal in exclusivity, this is the most overrated part of all. Been there, done that, got an 'F' on the term paper. Truth is, she'll have girlfriends and sisters and cousins who all long ago traded in their V card for admission to the mighty cock carousel, so she'll be 'intrigued' and 'curious' as to what other guys are like, and will inevitably go exploring (and boning). Marrying a virgin may have worked out in the 1600s, but not today when female hypergamy is completely unchecked (except within certain Islamic and other primitive cultures).

As for fucking the current GF doesn't like getting banged too hard, on account of a short love tunnel and of course my massive endowment (ok not really but we are a tight fit). Best with her on top and me having access to her various erogenous zones, all of which lead her to a pretty intense and reliable climax. She'll put up with the occasional doggy-style railing, but it gets painful if I go too deep and hard. She doesn't complain about the spankings, however...

Truth is, she'll have girlfriends and sisters and cousins who all long ago traded in their V card for admission to the mighty cock carousel, so she'll be 'intrigued' and 'curious' as to what other guys are like, and will inevitably go exploring (and boning).

But I do not think you can just say all girls are like that @Agasmic, I do not think you are being fair. I have never been interested in any man but my first one when I was a virgin and 16, I married him 8 years later when I was 24 because I was that sure of him and he is just everything I have wanted. I think maybe it is a bit unusual now and some times other women have asked me if I ever felt like trying other men to find out what they are like but I have heard a lot of men are just not such good lovers. Some men have tried to get with me and have tried to ask me out and a few have been cocky enough to try to ask me to go to bed with them but I think I am a bit intimidating for most men and they just like to look from distance. I would never be interested in any of them and I do not think I have missed anything. I am very lucky I have got my husband who is a real man in every way, and I appreciate him. He gives me so much in bed, I know what I have got. 🌹

My wife and I rarely made love - we fucked -- we viewed sex more like an athletic event. She liked it hard, intense, and if you didn't sweat you didn't do it hard enough. I remember one time my penis was raw after a great session. Had to lay off for a couple of days.