September 12th, 1958

Another day and I am so stupid. I was working in the anesthesiology storage helping doctors get thing ready to put people to sleep and cleaning up their messes. The smell of ether has made me queasy since I was 8 but it was really strong in there. It was even making me light headed. I snuck out for some air and who managed to corner me but Doctor Mason.

“Hi...Ummm… You’re Emily?”

“You know who I am.”

“Are you… have you been.. Ok?”

“Yeah… what do you want?”

“Nothing…. I just… I’m really sorry… I was um… really nervous…”

“You were really rough is what you were. I was sore a week!”

“Oh umm...I’m really sorry Emily… Ummm can I… make it up to you?”

“What? NO!”

“I mean like would you like to go have a milkshake or something… Movie? Do you like movies… Ummm… I like movies.”

“You’re just as awkward with fully dressed women aren’t you? Fine, I am off on Friday… I’ll meet you at Richardson’s Drugs at 6 and we can walk over.”

“Really?”

“Yes, now please go away before I change my mind!”

Poor guy scurried off like an excited puppy and I am sure I only said yes because I was high on ether...I actually bummed a cigarette from Alice who came out a moment or two later. I never smoked before… Honestly, I don't think I will again.

September 15th, 1958

Well Peter is actually really nice. OK yes he’s pretty awkward but nice. Though when Annie found out I was having a date with an intern… I didn’t tell her who… she made me wear one of my nicer dresses. But we had ice cream. Went to the movies… I was having fun until we went to the diner. Then all of a sudden I couldn’t get out of my mind this man had seen me naked… and worse… “You ok Emily? I had a lot of fun tonight.”

“Can… well OK I’m just going to ask… what the hell happened.”

“When?”

“You know when…”

“Oh… I am sorry I was so nervous...I… I…”

“You what Peter…”

“I… Never saw a naked girl before…”

“What? Haha really? You’re a doctor.”

“Well… Not up close like that… and then…”

“Then????”

“You were pretty… I had to not think about that part… It was really awkward…”

“Yeah well… You don’t know awkward… I’ve never even seen a naked man, no one has ever touched there… Nothing has ever been inside there and it hurt…”

“I… I… am sorry…”

“And you young doctors in tittle only using us as guinea pigs! You don’t have to go get intimate examinations like that!”

“We do… we… just…”

“Just what?”

“We need to practice male exams on each other...OK…”

“Oh... “

“And no avoiding a classmate after that.”

“Oh… Yeah… I didn’t know…”

Anyways he walked me home after that.

“Can I see you again?”

“Yes… I am sorry I made things awkward in the diner.”

“It’s OK.” then he kissed me… it was kind of strange at first then felt electric as my dad switched the porch light on…

“I...I… Never kissed a girl before either…”

“You’re not supposed to tell me that… But.. but.. I’ve never been kissed..”

I read through the next parts of her diary. A lot of dates with my grandfather Peter.. But by today’s standards hoaky 50’s dates. Going to dances, movies, diners and really nothing but kisses… Though all of a sudden I found this gem.

December 10th, 1958

I can’t wait for Christmas. I volunteered to work during the day but my family and I are taking the train to see Peter’s for dinner that night. Only Annie knows he was that “dumb doctor.” from our exam day. She finds it a little funny seeing how I had vowed never to talk to that man. BUT I did manage to get him to tell me about his exam! Gosh I have been curious since our first date but he never wanted to tell me anything. My oh my no wonder he was shy! Same sort of layout and groups like we had but no bathrobes! Just standing around naked with each other. I know men have everything kind of on the outside but he said he was red with embarrassment when his classmate had to pull his foreskin back and feel for a hernia. THEN his friend put a finger in his butt! I guess men have a prostate. He said it didn’t hurt but some men got involuntary erections! Including him… Oh my… I see why he was embarrassed…. And made me curious.

Well he starts his OB-GYN Rotation on the first and I start actual patient care on the first… We made a deal no one can ever know. I’ll give him an opportunity to practice another exam on me… If I get to see what it’s like to do one on him… Honestly it’s just an excuse… I kind of want him to be the first naked man I see before I give some 70 year man old a sponge bath… And maybe a little turn about for what he did to me…

December 12th, 1958

Well today was the day I let Peter practice and well oh my so much happened! I finished at 6 and he had the day off… He met me at the hospital and we snuck to an unused room in the basement that had an exam table in storage. It was cold down there. I don’t think it’s been heated in years. We actually havigated the heating tunnels and passageways with a flashlight so no one would know we were there. Oh I think we’d have been in some big trouble if we got caught!

He set things up in advance for us. Other than being a storage room filled with all sorts of old hospital junk it was like a real exam room… I am still a proper lady so I didn’t let him watch me undress… and I kept my panties on until he needed me to take them off. He was so much cooler, calmer, and well still professional! I told him it was the cold room but something felt a little more electric about his breast exam. I mean it was professional but at the same time I felt the touch in a different way…

When he felt my abdomen he had me lower my panties down a bit leaving my fur exposed.. A little surprising but OK… Then I slid them off for the scary part. Yes I was super nervous. I was really afraid it would hurt again… well bless his soul he thought ahead.. Wrapped a speculum up in an electric blanket for me! It’s way less cold and felt so much more comfortable like that… I really didn’t like the feeling of it opening but it didn’t hurt… And he found my cervix on the first try this time! Well the pap test cramped but not as bad...Then he did the bimanual exam… Again not as bad but really awkward to have fingers up in there! I tried to get him to skip putting a finger in my bottom but again he did better… The key really is baring down… Yeah it feels super weird but it didn’t hurt.

When he was finished I quickly got my panties and bra back on. And a deal is a deal so I was his “Doctor” next… He was so shy! I let him keep his boxers on while I listened to his heart and lungs and felt his belly… Then I had him stand up and take them off… And WOW haha OK maybe a little bit scary too… his penis hanging there over his scrotum… Haha it was hard to use the proper words… I think I looked at it too long because he was like “Umm Emily?”

I pulled his foreskin back like his exam notes he smuggled to me said. No redness (giggled) Oh my I was actually touching one! Then I examined his testicles and checked for a hernia… And by then “it” was starting to grow. Haha I had to really push him on letting me do his rectal. But fair is fair right? I had him bend over the edge of the table and did it… Felt so tight around my finger.. Like nothing I’ve experienced before… Haha I guess he had to tell me when to stop because he was like “Emily that’s enough,,,please,”

Then when he jumped down he was fully erect! I couldn’t resist and it was VERY unprofessional of me but I put my hand around it.. I stroked it a few times wondering how something like that fits inside a girl! but then Peter told me to stop. He seemed a little upset actually. He ran off with his clothes to the walk in closet! I finished getting dressed and he came out looking and acting much calmer a few minutes later...we cleaned up a bit and he put the exam stuff in his bag and snuck back out.

We skipped the movie and just had dinner and well… made out in his car until about 10:00… He rushed me home and Pa was not happy with him for bringing me home late… Haha Pa has no clue the hanky happened BEFORE the date…

And well tonight something else happened. I started touching my breasts in the bath tub… Thinking about Peter.. Him seeing me naked… His touch… His erection.. I touched myself.. Not like usual where I get a little nervous and stop...But I went all the way...WOW I had to bite my arm not to scream out as the sensations built in me…

December 18th 1958

Nurse Henderson called me into her office today. I wasn’t in trouble but she was concerned. “You’ve been spending a lot of time with Doctor Mason.. Are you two seeing each other?”

“Oh.. sort of…”

“Emily… You’re becoming a fine nurse… Don’t throw it out for some man.”

“What do you mean?”

“Finish your degree just to get married and leave us. Or worse…”

“Worse?”

“Become pregnant before you’re settled down… It’s happened… In my day we were not allowed to date or get married… But it happened… Young ladies and young men working so close together and under stress.”

“I Really like him though.”

“Emily, just keep your legs together and have him keep his pants on OK? And remember men think with their… you know... “

“I know…”

She gave me a rather frank sex talk then to be sure I understood just about everything about not getting pregnant was an old wives tale. It was extremely clinical but also just made me more curious when she was talking about men ejaculating… I mean I already knew the science of it but knowing a little more was just interesting… Haha and a little more interesting than my mom explaining a man “plants a seed.”

December 23rd 1958

Well two days until Christmas! I saved up to get Peter a new watch that I just picked up today. Then we snuck off again so he could have some practice. I really don’t mind it any more but I wish I could see someone else having one… And well want to know why I find his touch so electric… I know those are very wrong thoughts to have during a medical exam but…

...but I think he had some too because when it was my turn to be his doctor he was erect before I even touched there… So I asked him the question… “Have you ever ejaculated?”

“What!”

“Like have you?”

“You’re really not supposed to…”

“That’s not what I asked Peter.”

“Yeah umm… I have…” He said so shyly “I man kind of needs to if he gets too far into this condition…”

“It happens to girls too…”

“Haha but girls can’t relieve themselves…”

“Oh… we can…”

“What how??” he said in a very shy but very inquisitive voice.

“I’ll leave it a mystery for now Peter… but go do what you need to do in that closet you run off into.” I said with a chuckle.

Poor guy was red with embarrassment when he ran off. I really wish I could have seen it happen… And well he was really shy with me the rest of the night. Though I did ask him if I could see him practice on someone else…

He was a bit shocked but said “If you can find someone I guess.”

December 26th 1958

It’s just passed midnight and we just got home from Peter’s family. I worked most of the day pretty much cleaning and disinfecting again. Even though we picked the same day to work I only managed to see Peter for fifteen minutes… BUT I actually made friends with Mable… She’s been so quiet and shy I barely knew her. No one really does but we spent the day together and actually got along great. She got sick from the smell of ether too so we both went out and got some air. She asked me why I wanted to be a nurse and I told her about when I had my tonsils out at eight. The nurses were so nice to me I wanted to be one also… Turns out the same thing happened to her and she had hers out the week after me. Though she’s really worried about having to leave us. Nurse Henderson commented that unless she can up her personality a bit, especially when she starts with patients she might be out.

My folks and sister got along great with Peter’s family but I nearly died when his great aunt showed up for dinner… Who walks in but Nurse Henderson! Peter thought I already knew! I didn’t! Not only that she was joking around with everyone playing with kids… I didn’t think she was like that. I was shocked.

She quietly pulled me aside and said “Emily, don’t tell anyone I’m like this outside of work and please outside of the hospital treat me like an old aunt and you can call me Stella.”

BUT I also heard her pull Peter aside. “Peter, that's one of my top students… If you break her heart, knock her up, or make any other whoopie with her before I can make a nurse out of her I will break your neck…”

“Auntie…”

“Quiet! You’re both young, keep your futures ahead of you!”

And just had a brilliant idea I might try and get Mable to be Peter’s and myself’s patient… I was originally thinking of Annie but she’s too chatty and how do I even ask my best friend that? But Mable is quiet enough to not tell anyone.. And maybe I can do her a favor by talking to nurse Henderson for her? At the very least she looks nothing like me so I don’t think I’ll be jealous of her being examined by Peter…

December 31, 1958

New Years Eve! Peter is working overnight but the nursing students got sent home at noon. Annie and I are taking Mable out for the evening and I just wanted to make an entry before heading out the door.

I brought up our exam day. Really just asked who was in her group. She mentioned something along the lines of “Wonder what all the doctor was looking at.” but she was feeling too shy to actually watch… Well convinced Mable to be our patient which she agreed to under the condition she got to see me examined first and I didn’t mind her watching. I was actually rather shocked she agreed so easily. I didn’t tell Peter it was my little surprise for our 1PM appointment in our secret exam room.

Mable and I snuck down and Peter was really shocked.

“Why did you bring her?”

“You needed some more practice and Mable agreed and you’ll need to be able to do this with a nurse looking over your shoulder. You can examine me first. Then Mable so you have another patient under your belt before you start your OB-GYN rotation.”

“Mable, is that OK with you?”

“Yes doctor… Just…”

“Just what? And you’re not going to tell anyone... right?”

“Just… can… can... you explain everything as you go on Emily’s… ladyness?” her response made me chuckle.

So it was my turn first and he did his usual breast exam and abdominal exam but the pelvic just felt so much more different with Mable watching right over his shoulder. She got in really close! Somehow hearing him explain everything was so exciting to me… He showed her the pattern of my pubic hair, labia majora and my labia minora… The cold air and maybe a little excitement when he showed her my clitorus was a bit electric… my urethral opening… my “partially intact” hymen... my anus… Everything! He really took his time! It just felt electric even though I couldn’t stop thinking that a friend was watching! He did a great job with the speculum again and Mable let out an OH WOW when she saw it open. He explained everything he was feeling during the bimanual to her. Ovaries, fallopian tubes, uterus… and during the rectovaginal and rectal explained everything to her.

Now it was her turn. So I got fully dressed while she stripped behind a screen over in the corner. She walked very shyly over to the table, her entire pleasantly plump body actually a little flush! It was actually a little cute. I loved seeing someone with a large chest examined. It really made Peter work. Pushing the stethoscope under her left breast and her very erect nipples on display. I don’t know why I was so excited to see him examine her breasts but I was.

Before she got into the stirrups she said “I’m so nervous.” I told her that I’d be right there with her watching and she said thanks. He didn’t give me the grand tour he gave her, to my disappointment, but I loved seeing it just the same! She's blond everywhere and a little sparser down there than I am...and her labia seemed a bit… aroused… not that any of us would admit that.. And I’d never admit to them that I was very aroused watching.

When it was over before she even got dressed she gave Peter a peck on the cheek and said “thank you.” I helped her get dressed and when I helped her find her way out she pecked a kiss on me and said “Thank you to!” So when I went back to help Peter pick up I lost my composure as a proper woman I’m afraid… I pulled his penis out of his pants and stroked it until it was hard… then when he didn’t stop me I did until he exploded… like everywhere… It was not what I expected that to be like at all!

Though when I touched myself in the bath tonight my mind was stuck on the image of his fingers disappearing inside Mable’s blond hair covered ladyhood… and the thought that someday he might explode like that inside me! I guess I am a little bent in the head.