Does anal sex hurt?

I've had a strapon in my ass, my girlfriend fucking me with it either bent over the bed or on my back legs pulled up to my chest. Felt incredible. Also have had one sometimes two or three fingers in my ass, again, an amazing feeling. Never had probably never will have a real cock in my ass but if my girlfriend wanted to watch me get fucked like that I'd consider it.

Only time it was painful was when a woman tried pushing a too big buttplus in my anus. Couldn't take it.

Does it hurt?? Absolutely! No matter how much lube you use it still hurts.

The real question here is it worth the pain? The girl I've fucked anally say it does!

Hmm. I've used toys on myself, and if I'm careful they don't hurt. I would imagine a good partner (hope I will be one if my wife ever lets me do her, and hope she is one if I ever persuade her to strap one on and do me!) would do the same and it would be only slightly uncomfortable or "odd feeling" at first.

My concern is if it's too long because of the curve in there at like 6 '' + . I put things in to that point and it feels bad, so if I try the real thing it is going to have to be not too long.

@Dr_masters said

Does it hurt?? Absolutely! No matter how much lube you use it still hurts.

There is NO QUESTION about it.

YOU ARE DOING IT WRONG.

I learned that you have to be real relaxed. If you have anxiety or not relaxed, it can hurt. One boyfriend tried but it hurt way too much. A nice glass of wine and nice anal massage so get you relaxed.

I totally agree: relaxation is key. Lube helps. Go small at first. Wait for the sphincters to relax before advancing with size or distance. Lube. Lube. Lube.

Then enjoy.

I agree that you can never use too much lube, and the best choice seems to be Vaseline, but the key is that you have to move very slowly, and the woman needs to be relaxed, for it to work. I've had girlfriends who had never experienced anal sex, and found that they enjoyed it more than vaginal, and others who didn't like it under any circumstances. Maybe some women's anal sphincters are just too tight, while others expand more easily. I really don't know.

As it has been said many times.. Lube.. Lube .. Lube. Everyone says to just relax and I agree relaxation is key. However, for a novice just beginning, they don't really know HOW to just relax the anus for anal sex. I've been using butt plugs and dildos for many many years. In my experience, the key to relaxing the anus, first off is to make sure your cleaned out and secondly give a slight push, like your trying to push a stool out ( thus is why is good to be cleaned out ). This will relax the sphincter and allow it to open up as wide as you need it to. It will also push the colon towards the rectum a bit, allowing access easier for deeper play. Just passing on my experience. Enjoy the Play!!

Before you start, have good communication!

IF ANYTHING HURTS-STOP. THAT'S YOUR BODY SAYING SOMETHING IS NOT RIGHT.

THIS IS ON YOUR TERMS, not your partners.

1. Clean out really good.

2. Add lots of lube.

3. Add more. Add condom now if you planning on using one.

4. Be sexually stimulated. Make out or whatever gets you going.

5. Once excited, have your hole penetrated by 1 finger. Keep sexual excitement throughout rest of play!

6. Add a finger.

7. Add another if needed (depending on how big your partner is).

8. Switch fingers for partner. GO SLOW. You can speed up later.

9. Being careful, ENJOY!

P.S. Don't lose condom!

Does anyone realize that this post originated 4 yrs. ago?

The person or computer, we do not know who actually did the posting, from 4 yrs ago has not been around since then. But Zity leaves all these fake/unknown/computer created profiles online. If all the dormant accounts were taken away the number of real people who post/read/correspond with others would be dramatically fewer.

I think it is ok for some people to talk about her question though @Michael001

@Michael001 said

Does anyone realize that this post originated 4 yrs. ago?

So What?

It is a valid interesting topic and people besides the original poster would like to hear replies.

@Michael001, its a thread that still bears interest not only with newbies but with veteran members.

If that were not the case there would not be any new responses. If you look at the dates it has been alive and kicking this whole time.

As far as deleting threads from members that are no longer active, that is absurd.

If a thread has no interest it will kill itself off.

There is also the advice that has been given numerous times. If you have no interest in a thread, keep moving on.

That simple.

I agree with Susie & Bridgette - in fact, every so often I run across a "dead" thread and post to it to bring it back active, because I think it is still interesting. The mere fact that the original poster is no longer on Zity, regardless of the reason does not invalidate the post. I DO agree with removing obviously phony profiles, and perhaps long dead ones. If the "dead" poster decides to return to Zity, there is nothing stopping them from rejoining. Likewise, if a poster is removed for cause, that does not mean that valid posts by that individual (even it is a BOT) should be removed. Obviously ridiculous or abusive posts should be removed, but that leaves the problem of how to determine whether a post falls into an unwanted category. There should be a procedure for making this decision, not just that it upset one moderator. I might suggest requiring that perhaps three mods should sign off on removal. Oh, and before posting to a long thread, one should look back to see if a roughly equivalent post already exists. (Yeah, repetitious, but worth reminding.) Thoughts?

There are thread topics that get a lot of posts then lay static for a while, then come back with a lot of interest.

This type of waxing and waning of interest can go on for years.

Oh, and before posting to a long thread, one should look back to see if a roughly equivalent post already exists. (Yeah, repetitious, but worth reminding.)

If a member does repeat something previously said, it doesn't bother me. It just reinforces what others have already said. I do hope that members do not repeat themselves in the same topic with multiple posts saying very similar things.

@Dragonflies369: “P.S. Don't lose condom!"

Laughed out loud - even though it is true!

@Michael001 said

The person or computer, we do not know who actually did the posting, from 4 yrs ago has not been around since then. But Zity leaves all these fake/unknown/computer created profiles online. If all the dormant accounts were taken away the number of real people who post/read/correspond with others would be dramatically fewer.

As I've said before, we will not be deleting half the site just because there are posts written by members who no longer visit, nor are those members' accounts being deleted. Their contributions are part of the content of Zity.biz to be seen and enjoyed by members both old and new. Deleting their accounts would destroy the fabric of conversations held on the forum and would disassociate posts and comments from individuals even if they did later rejoin. I see no reason why we would want to do something so destructive.

Sometimes people create an account and quickly lose interest, but that is no reason to condemn them as fake. Any account that truly is a problem is dealt with, believe me.

Now we have settled that, can we please get this thread back on topic.

The question was

I had sex already. But never in the butt. Does it hurt. And if I do try any advice to give me when doing it?

The OP might no longer visit the site, but despite that, the topic is a valid one and members wish to discuss it.

As far as advice, lube and relaxation are probably the most important things. I wish I had anal sex but as curious as my wife is she has an absurdly low pain tolerance so it's something that has to be worked up to very slowly. I look forward to when we start doing this. In the meantime though she only likes a finger or a small plug. Have fun and take it at your own pace.

@DrZ - If you took my comment about short-lived accounts as an indication that these people are fakes, that was not my intent. I must respectfully disagree that accounts should never be deleted automatically after some period of inactivity. As I said, if a member later decides to come back, they can rejoin as easily as they originally did. (It would also insure that they update their information.) As for detecting fakes, most of us on here can ferret out posers, if we follow their posts.

@Soapy4me, I respectfully disagree. If the account is deleted for being inactive, it removes their name from their posts. Also, if they come back and have to rejoin, they won't be able to do things such as add to or edit stories they've written. I have taken very long breaks (a few years at least once) from the site since joining.

@Dragonflies369 summed it up pretty well. For the clean out you don’t need to flush out the entire colon - really only the first 8 inches or so. If you do a relatively large enema you may have some water higher up in the colon that didn’t get expelled that can get sucked out during anal sex. We’ve enjoyed lots of anal sex without enemas or a clean out. I could count on one hand the number of times it got messy. If you play back there it’s gonna happen!

Like I said, this thread needs to stay on topic, but I will address this -

@Soapy4me said

@DrZ - If you took my comment about short-lived accounts as an indication that these people are fakes, that was not my intent.

No, I was addressing comments made by @Michael001.

@Soapy4me also said

I must respectfully disagree that accounts should never be deleted automatically after some period of inactivity. As I said, if a member later decides to come back, they can rejoin as easily as they originally did.

With all due respect, being able to re-register is not the point.

Some members care about their site contributions still having their name against them, and 'belonging' to them. To have to make a new account would mean their old posts were no longer theirs. Deleting an account breaks that ownership, making contributions 'orphaned' with no name against them. People have discussions on this forum, and the loss of names against many posts would make it difficult for others to identify and follow conversations in older but still interesting exchanges of posts. It would be much more difficult to tell who was talking to who, and that is why it would be so damaging.

I can think of a number of members who, if they had an enforced absence, would be very angry and offended if their accounts and possibly their posts were destroyed against their will just as if they were never here.

@bbw4doc also made very valid comments regarding loss of control over story contributions. There would in effect be no ownership of material written under deleted accounts.

What would it achieve? If someone's idea of 'tidiness' is that the site should be reserved only for currently active members and the rest should be deleted, no thanks. In my view that would be destructive. It would certainly be irreversible.

If a member does not enjoy reading certain material such as older threads, they don't have to read them. They should only read what they do actually enjoy. If they want to only read new threads, that's all they need to read. Let those who do want to read older material read it. There is individual choice and preference here, something for everyone. It's very simple.

@DrZ that was an excellent post all around.

And to keep on topic, anal sex hurts only if it is done wrong and without proper preparation, physically and mentally and even emotionally. I won't repeat the steps to ensure a pleasant anal sex experience because they have been adequately discussed.

I enjoy anal intercourse very much and my first time was done with care and consideration. It was a great experience and I love having it.

Thank you again @DrZ for your excellent response. 🌹

Lots and lots of care consideration, cuddling, foreplay and lube. But not to match lube. But I must say it will still hurt at least initially but once things let go it can be a wonderful experience.

If you want it and you be open and ready to do it, and when your partner is most careful, it will not hurt or only a little while inserting. Be free to test it by yourself with a rectal thermometer, your finger or a small dildo, and let your partner try in the same kind. And then - if you really want it - try it really.

If it’s done wrong it can hurt but if you take it easy and use lots of lube it can be great!

What worked for me is my husband gradually training my anal muscles to stretch or expand. I have a couple of pink glass dildos that start small and get larger. It's like marbles stacked on each other from small to large to larger. Or my husband used his fingers from one to two then to three. When he inserted the third finger it was shaped like a triangle. We used lubricant but not a great amount. Like any muscle in your body you can train the anal muscles to gently stretch. I could feel the process of my muscles opening. Once I learned to do this our first anal sex session was great. We have been doing this for years and it's my preferred way of having sex. Vaginal sex is good by anal sex to me and my husband is special. My favorite way is me in his lap with my back resting against his chest. My legs are draped over his and we can kiss while we have our special fun. This is not a wham, bamm, thank you mamm type of having sex. This is very intimate Love Making! Give this method a try! I've been doing this for about 35-40 years and it's only gotten better.

Oh, I've had my own Medical Examination Table in my home for a good number of years now. I will say anal sex with my legs or feet in the stirrups, we have two types is great. We are face to face and he can kiss my lips or breasts or we can talk intimately as we make love.

Anal muscles can be trained just like your quads or biceps!

HMMM . If you do it wrong it would . Always do enemas to clean out the poop first. For the first time laying on the back with legs up is a good position so the hole is relaxed. Being on the knees bent over makes the ass hole tight . I like this . Lots of fore play and be lubricated . For the going in push out like you are trying to poop and take the cock or dildo to the side. Think about it a little . The average cock is about the same size as a poop so it will fit easily. Both the woman and man are designed to enjoy anal sex. It is a natural thing to do.

Being turned on and enjoying the anal sex is the main thing. You can be surprised at how good it feels . It is my preferred hole for sex penetration.