Looking for new ideas on what you male subs want?
If they are truly submissive, they want you to choose. A true submissive gets their thrill by serving you.
I love giving up control and receiving an enema from a dominant female. That will make him feel very submissive. Then when he is clean, you could penetrate him with a strapon dildo.
It's control, punishment, and embarrassment. To be "put in your place." If it's a scenario, to create a situation in which the female or Dom/me is challenged by the sub. Then, to have the sub be controlled and humiliated. Usually, by removing clothes or pants only. Spanking and discipline. Then through being "used" as a bottom. Forced enema, and/or other items inserted in the butt. Others probably have more severe punishments. Things like licking bathroom floors or toilets are not for me. But evidently many people enjoy those types of things. That's my two cents.
I agree that it's not what a sub wants. Having said that I do get really turned on being required to hold an enema until I'm given permission to expel. This is especially true when you must hold it someplace public where leaking would be embarrassing.
I don't think enemas are the answer in this case... I'm just looking for ideas of something new. Wearing my underwear to work ect
If I were you, I'd go to local BDSM munches (meetings) and talk to real Dominant women and their submissives. With luck, you'll find a mentor and play parties at which to observe, learn and practice.
If having him wear your panties is working well you could try this: the next time you get your period and he is wearing panties, announce to him "Uh-oh. WE just got our period. Come here and I will help you." Have him pull his pants down to his ankles and then his panties down to his knees. You stick a large thick maxi-pad into the crotch and have him pull them up. Tell him the pad will take care of things for awhile, but that you will have a talk with him later that evening to explain everything.
That evening, you can explain to him that he should expect to get his period about every 4 weeks, but he never can be sure of exactly when it will start. Get him a calendar to hang on the bedroom wall, and mark today with a "P1". Then mark the next few days P2, P3, and P4. Have him mark a day 4 weeks away as P so that he has it to look forward to. Tell him that days 1, 2, and 3 he will have to wear a thick pad, but that day 4 he can switch to a thin panty liner. If he ever plans to go swimming during his period you will show him how to use a tampon, but you can wait until the need arises.
On day 2 have him pull his panties down like before, and you get the maxi-pad ready, but this time you explain that it is normal to experience some discomfort and or pain associated with his period, and so on day 2 the pad will be worn with the adhesive facing up. Have him spread his legs and you stick the pad to his skin, from his balls to his ass. Thru out the day this will pull at his skin and short hairs each time he moves, reminding him of the situation.
Another thing you can try is have him join you in the bathroom. Have him remove his pants and panties. You then remove your panties with your dirty period soaked pad attached. Have him put them on, snugging your warm wet pad tightly against his skin. You then get a fresh one for yourself.
Send him to the store to buy large maxi-pads and some panty liners. Tell him you want him to bring back a receipt, and there can only be those two items on the receipt, no other items. Be sure this is not a self checkout store, he must pay a sales clerk at the checkout.
H C, I like this. Maybe she should sit down on the sofa next to him while watching TV, scoot down a little bit so that her hips are just at the edge, spread her legs, snap her fingers a few times, and point to under her skirt. He then has to get down on the floor on his hands and knees to lick her pussy while she reclines comfortably.
After a little while she can tap him on the head and send him to the kitchen to get her a drink. When he returns it's back to the task. He will not get to watch any of the show, only hear the audio. (Unless of course she closes her legs slightly and presses her thighs against his ears.)
I think the issue of what happens to the cum should be addressed.
If you are a squirter, then your cum probably ends up on the sheets, a towel, or on the floor. I consider this waisted opportunity. His face, hair, or mouth are all better locations. If on his face or hair, he should let it dry in place and wear it like that all day. If in his mouth, swallowing is great, and snowballing back with you is also hot. You can also soak up any extra juices with a pair of panties that he has to wear for the rest of the day.
With his cum there are many options. If he cums in your mouth I would certainly have some snowballing fun. If it is on your chest or belly, he should spread the cum all over your tits using only his face. You should grab his head and really rub his face in it to get good coverage. Allow him to lick your nipples clean. Again let it all dry in place and then both of you can wear the dried crispy jizz all day. If he comes in or on your pussy this is just a straight up cleaning project for his tongue.
Keep in mind that for most guys, their interest in eating or tasting their own cum drops immediately after they shoot their load. Knowing this you can play it one of two ways. You can force it on him immediately for a punishment effect. This will probably be accompanied by a feeling of disgust, and may make him dread cumming the next time. The alternative is to wait a little while, gently play with him and lead towards more arousal and another erection. Then, as his interest in sex grows again, make him do his cum chore as the next step in your session. I prefer this approach as it lets his natural interest in the issue grow again, and cultivates an eager and obedient man who sees eating his own cum as a half way point in the overall arc of the session. Letting the cum sit on your belly or pussy while you coax him back into action is easy. If it runs down you side or down your ass crack don't worry. He'll still find it all and do his job when the time comes. It may actually allow for a little more cream pie to ooze out of your pussy. The real trick will be if his load is all in your mouth. Pretend that you swallowed it with pleasure, but give him the "shhh no talking" sign and just rest in silence. A little stroking, moaning, and rubbing will do the trick to get his mind revving up again. Once you know he is on board with more fun, maneuver to be on top, straddling him. Sitting on his limp cock, sliding your clit along its length, place his hands on your tits. As the fever builds you can then lean forward, pin down his arms over his head, and go in for the kiss. Start out with lips only, and then invite in his tongue and open mouth. The surprise that you've been holding his load all along, saving it for him, will be impressive and humbling. Your physical dominance on top of him is great. But there is a mental component in that you have already endured with the cum load in your mouth for quite awhile, that now he must take it and swallow it. You have already out done him regarding this task. He is the lesser if you two. He has many loads of cum ahead of him, and may never reach the point of being your equal. You have taken all he could give, held it, and then given at all right back to him on your own terms. You win.
If he needs a command, keep your eyes intensely locked to his. Pull away from his mouth just enough to whisper "Now swallow." After he swallows follow with "Smile," and then finally "Good boy."
Once a week have him open his wallet and pull out all the dollar bills. ($1, $5, $10, $20, etc.) Give him a pen and a list of sentences such as...
I eat my own cum to please my wife.
I sleep in lingerie to please my wife.
I wear a butt plug to please my wife.
I keep tampons in my briefcase to please my wife.
I keep my butthole clean to please my wife.
My butthole belongs to my wife.
I like to wear my wife's dirty panties.
I like to wear my wife's bras on the weekend.
I like to lick my wife's pussy after she pees.
I like to lick my wife's pussy after she goes jogging.
Have him write one sentence on each bill, and then put them back in his wallet. All week long, whenever he pays for something, he is secretly handing the sales clerk a confession. Most of the time they'll not notice the message. If they do notice the two of them can have a laugh at the crazy things you find written on money these days.
Of course someone may tell you that defacing US currency is a crime. You should also know that anal sex is illegal in 12 states, as is buying or selling sex toys in Alabama. You should always think twice before breaking a law.
And just to be safe, when you buy a cucumber in Alabama I recommend you announce loudly at the checkout that you "plan to eat the vegetable, and not just play with it."
Most male subs I have spoken with want to rid themselves of any and all guilt they feel for the kinky desires they have. They want to have ZERO control of what is happening to them.
Well said. I've never had the opportunity to serve as a submissive, but my fantasy for doing so involves just that - having kinky things done to me or be made to do kinky things - without the fear of be blamed for being too kinky. "You told me to me do it"!
I guess seeing it put that way makes it seem unfair to the partner (Domme) because now I'm hoping she will push the kinky limits that I was afraid to bring up myself. She most likely may share the same fear of maybe "crossing the line".
I guess that gives even more merit to the BDSM survey forms that were mentioned earlier in this thread. Sheesh, at 53 you would have thought I'd have sorted some of this out by now 😃
Doug there actually are not very many females who enjoy being the dominant partner in sex compared to the number of men who want to be submissive ONLY during sex. These males are really just trying to Top from the Bottom, meaning being submissive to the female by telling their partner what to do to them.
Nothing wrong with a relationship like this as it works very well for those females who don't have a great dominant imagination.
My only sub desire is to be the patient of a beautiful but strict nurse who gives me painful injections in my vulnerable bare bottom, ideally while bending over the mini-skirted lap of her condescendingly "sympathetic" receptionist.
For me it was to just be controlled and perhaps a little embarrassed.
My dream is find some enema nurces who clean me out! 😃
I would like to meet a straight male like me who is into just giving enemas in a pseudo-medical scenario...
I had a date last week with a very hot married 30 y/o guy who says he has good sex with his wife. He was open about being a sub, looking for a Dom. He wanted to be spanked and his ass played with. He even brought his dildo and butt plus with him. He indicated that another guy he sees gives him enemas from time to time. I spent 2 hours spanking his very gorgeous butt, using fingers, butt plug and dildo on his hole. Before getting into ass play, I gave him a warm water enema which he had no problems taking and holding for nearly 30 mins. A very enjoyable event and hope to repeat.
Have him raise his legs up so his knees and cock are over his face, as if he were receiving a pile driver. Instead, this is a great position to kneel over his face and receive oral from him while you give him oral. When he is about to cum back up and milk the cum onto his face and mouth. You can hold his heax between your knees if necessary and insure his back is to a couch or wall to minimize his resistance. After he cums let him relax on his back. Push any cum on his face into his mouth. Do not speak to him, smile, or show any emotion. If he speaks tell him to be absolutely quiet.
For a couple days show him no affection.
Do not give him verbal directions. It is much more demeaning to treat them as an object. Bring him to the bedroom by pulling his arm. Remove his clothes quickly. Reach between his legs from behind and firmly grasp his balls and cook, but do not pull.. With the other hand push on the back of his head, pushing it down so he is forced into a bending permission. Holding his balls like this ensurez he does not misinterpret what you want. He cannot step forward or try to kneel/sit without pulling against your grip. Then you can violate his ass how ever you want. He should remain unsure if you are enjoying this.
When ready for bed after you have scrubbed him roughly in the shower, the same way you'd clean a used dildo, then restrain his hands and lead him to lay on the floor next to the bed. Assuming he's in good health, do not bother drying him after the shower. Let him feel like a cold, wet, naked dog laying on the ground. He will likely fall asleep in a fetal position.
If you wake up in the night, especially 3am/4am when you can be almost assured he is asleep, the fetal position will be an excellent position giving you access for a firm slap to the balls. 3 very quick firm slaps should be enough to leave him in a half awake dazed stuppor rolling in agony. You could also wake him in pitch blacl darkness to an ass fucking. Restraining his hands ensures he cannot hurt you in a half asleep defensive response.
I know a couple where the guy dressed up as a princess for halloween. Knowing her, I have a feeling she made him do it. It's just the right balance to make people wonder if "he's doing it to be ironic" or "hes bi or being humiliated", just enough to kake people wonder, and make him aware that his sexuality and manliness are now doubtful in the eyes of others, but not enough for them to address it directly.
It's too bad Justcurious hasn't been curious in 2 years to see all these great responses that could help her. Oh well.
I would love a long slow session of anal stimulation that starts with enemas with water and maybe coffee and progresses from small dildos to larger and longer ones, maybe progressing to two at once with me having to give oral of some sort at the same time on a vagina or cock. Restraints would be nice too in a dungeon, layed out, perhaps at a fetish party for a lot of people to see and maybe participate in too. Lets add some food on me that the party goers have to eat on me without utensils. Yummy!
One can always ask their sub what they want. They could send links to toys, stories, other posts that they liked. It is a personal thing, an individual thing what a sub wants. It's not the same for each sub.
Not discounting the sexual connection or desires, to be wanted, needed, desired, respected and treated as as human being. Maybe be trite but the push and pull come here go away is draining and not productive. We all have needs some are not easy to get along with like me, but feeling unneeded and unwanted is devastating. Following rules doing things completing tasks is easy.
Words destroy lots of things and for a person of low self esteem doesn't take much. I am not a violent or aggressive type. Never been spanked or not as an adult anyway. But tell me I am disappointed in you or give the impression of not being wanted. I would rather take a whipping than have some one tell me that. And some things even if not intended hurt the same way.
Read that when a person feels appreciated they do all types of things as a response to the appreciation. I think that in the same way the lack there of brings a negative response. Not very profound.
Not very new original but to be wanted, needed and desired. I know it is strange. Probably unrealistic to expect to find that. Not to mention being worth that to some one. Feeling not wanted is painful and unpleasant. Some of that likely is what and who I am. Difficult at best and that is complicating
A sub needs two things. Love and Correction.
Love and Correction.[/quote]
I guess. For me, I want one thing. To be dominated.
Yes, please. Dominate me, you and a friend, or friends at every end of me on and on. Touching, caressing, inserting, penetrating, thrusting, choking, holding, binding......
you get the idea.
What popped into my head when I saw this thread:
Diane: Hello, Philip.
Dr. Phillip Barbay: What did he want?
Diane: Oh! What do ALL men want?
Dr. Phillip Barbay: [wryly] He wants you to dress up as Wonder Woman? Tie him up with a golden lariat and force him to tell the truth?
Diane: No, just dinner, Philip.
(A scene from the movie "Back to School.. Sorry... )
The individual personal thing is important. Why it is a big deal. Does it t make one feel more wanted and appreciated. It is a known fact that acceptance and appreciation bring a different response in a positive fashion. I like the writing on bills idea not sure why.
This may be simplistic, but it is not that far apart from what anyone would desire in a relationship: to be loved, cared for, guided, allowed to please, corrected if that is warranted. Perhaps it is different in so much as it is led by another, when the typical world views a relationship to be guided by the male, but being submissive is by no means a display of weakness or fragility. It is much the opposite, requiring the strength to have total trust and let one's guard down. To do, not to think and then do. Of course, this is just my opinion and observation.
Above all, to be cherished. I was fortunate enough to be cherished and to know it. I felt I would do anything to please her. She always sensed what was too much and stopped just short. In 40 years I never used a safe word.
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