Completely normal desires

The thing is, all of this is relative to culture and period. In the United States, not so long ago, laws were such that "unnatural" or "deviant" sex (oral and anal) were criminalized (despite no indication that they created problems to society). My mother considered cunnilingus to be a disgusting perversion. Now, I gather that a young man is going to be considered selfish if not proposing cunnilingus to partner.

As @doc4u72 stresses, "normal" has a statistical meaning that should not be imbued with judgment; it sorts of mean "near average". Certainly one would not call a short or tall person "abnormal"; there are less inflammatory words for it.

My own guidelines are: is your fetish harmless to others? harmless to you? does it obsess you to the point that you cannot function in social life?

As @doc4u72 stresses, "normal" has a statistical meaning that should not be imbued with judgment; it sorts of mean "near average". Certainly one would not call a short or tall person "abnormal"; there are less inflammatory words for it.

Unless they're your sibling. Then there's a pretty good chance you'll find the most inflammatory word possible to describe them 😂

That is indeed the problem, because if we did, we'd be thought a bunch of perverts. I've tried and hinted often enough with friends to start a conversation on the subject, on any sexual subject actually and nothing ever comes of it.

@agracier hopefully you can find some open minded friends where you live. I live in an area that most would describe as conservative and behind the times but I have been able to find many like minded kinky friends.

I feel very normal, but what would all the people i know think if they knew i liked to have a couple of litres of soapy water pumped up my ass, or pushing a lump of soap up me and shitting it out into a disposable diaper ?

In the case of a vegetarian or vegan diet it will not only be a natural desire but a requirement to cleanse your large intestine in a regular manner, for example by taking daily a soapy enema.

It occurred to me that one of the reasons we of the Zity community feel so outside the bounds of normalcy is that we are constantly comparing our insides with other people's outsides. We have no idea what lies within the minds of most people we see on the streets or in our workplace every day. Not one person in a million would openly share the kinds of thoughts that we on Zity share openly amongst ourselves every day. Zity is an amazingly open community. Amazing!

I suspect that while most people we see would never openly share the kinds of thoughts 'we' have, a huge number DO actually have such thoughts. I suspect the vast majority have a 'kink' or 'fetish' of some kind, some to a greater extreme than other's. In my view, provided their fetish doesn't harm anyone and brings some pleasure and or release from the strains of everyday living, good luck to them. Here's to ALL kinksters - have a fantastic day!!

Everyone has desires of some form. As long as you aren't harming anyone, then I don't see the point in labeling one as normal and another as abnormal.

I know people have desires like having sex on a beach, having a threesome, having sex in a public space or joining the "mile high club." How is fantasizing about about putting your finger in someone's rectum or vagina is a doctor's office any more or less normal than fantasizing about having sex on an airplane?