Completely normal desires

I'm wondering what it was for other people here that helped them realize their medical fetishes were completely normal.

I struggled for the longest time with my fetishes, which range from Medical / Gynecological exams of my Wife to Masturbation / Cum eating.

Part of it for me was my Wife telling me that she had no problems with my interests and to enjoy my exams of her and to jerk off as much as I want as long as it doesn't interfere with our life. Part of it was when I accidentally saw the password of a co-worker of mine. It was BDSM*******. He saw that I saw it and yelled "Don't judge me." Personally I was like "Meh, go for it." in my head. I acted like I had no clue what he was talking about.

I've come to realize that what I like is normal and healthy.

What is your take on it?

Life is fleeting and fragile. We're all interested in what we are and there's nothing you can do to change that. As long as that doesn't involve hurting others or forcing people to do things against their will, I say embrace it and don't be ashamed of it.

Do what you enjoy, as long as it causes no pain to others (unless that's what they want)

Medical fetishes, along with the others, are OK, fine and good and harmless, but they aren't normal.

My big question is: Define normal!

@Susie, so if they aren't normal, what are they? There are are plenty of people who are into it. "Playing Doctor" is how many people discover their sexuality as children.

I could accept 'Not mainstream' maybe but I don't believe they aren't normal.

Oh boy, I have beaten this dead horse to a pulp in other threads on this same question.

The first thing to remember is that normal does NOT mean good and abnormal does NOT mean bad.

The second thing is that I include myself in the group with all you perverts. 😁

Normal means more people than not, do something or have some condition. Abnormal means something is NOT common or the usual in the population.

There is no "good or bad" in normal, but that doesn't stop people (like you) from making value judgements on it, which is why you want to call these fetishes and yourself "normal" except, you're not. Calling yourself "normal" just makes you feel better about yourself than being "abnormal."

If something is normal, IT IS mainstream.

Everything discussed on this website is ABNORMAL. Does that make it bad? No.

If you think all this fetish stuff is normal, go tell all your vanilla friends and relatives, including your children no matter what their age and your parents and in-laws. Oh, and don't forget to tell your boss and parole officer.

All the abnormal things we abnormal folks do here is just fine as long as we don't harm anyone.

I agree switch, weird is wonderful! I think that part of my interest in medfet is that its not normal, its something relatively unique that makes me a slightly more interesting person. That I can chat with others who share my fetish makes it all the more amazing!

First of all, Switch, I truly enjoy your posts.

I guess I never thought of my medfet interest as normal/abnormal or mainstream/nonmainstream. I guess if I had considered it to be normal/mainstream, I would have discussed it in the teacher's lounge over coffee in the morning. Sadly, the subject never came up.

I have always considered it to be an interest, just that. I think it is safe to say that there was some incident or moment in all of our medfet lives that triggered this interest. It may have also triggered the same interest in others who are concerned about pursuing the interest. Those of us on a site like this have over come that concern.

What really fascinates me, since I have been on sites such as this, is the different levels of medfet. This has been quite an education for me.

What has also fascinated me in the past few years is the reaction of both of my children to their own medfet interests. In the past few years they have been exposed to many medical procedures and they are transfixed about what has been done to them. They speak constantly about procedures, instruments, levels of exposure, embarrassment, and what is happening to others behind the doors of the exam room. I sit and listen and I am amused that there may well be two more medfetters coming from my lineage. And it all seems perfectly good and healthy to me

. . . . . I sit and listen and I am amused that there may well be two more medfetters coming from my lineage. And it all seems perfectly good and healthy to me

From discussions at family gatherings, I know that I have at least three first cousins and two first cousins once removed (children of my first cousins) who have significant interest and or have engaged in S&M activities, especially bondage and corporal punishment. (Enemas did not come up in this discussion.)

I will also say with great certainly that my two daughters will engage in S&M as soon as the opportunity arises for them. I know this because our 15 year old walked in on my husband and myself in the middle of a scene and the next day, when they were 12 and 15 respectively, they saw our equipment room and almost all its contents. They both had great interest in both the all the equipment and my leather and latex clothing. The then 15 year old wanted to try them on, but that wasn't going to happen. Now at 14 and 17, their sexualities and our discussions are in full bloom.

It’s taken me a long time to get comfortable with myself, knowing that I have the interests I do. I spent years feeling awkward and ashamed. I am still coming to terms with it. What has helped is having very supportive and trustworthy play partners, as well as several wonderful Zity friends.

Perhaps this article helps:

https://academic.oup.com/jsm/article/12/2/328/6980029?login=true

Human contact is very desirable and sexual it's what makes being human fun so it's only natural for medical to be fun and sexual same as food and cooking being sexual , enjoy your body and mind

@Annette1997

Perhaps this article helps:

https://academic.oup.com/jsm/article/12/2/328/6980029?login=true

An interesting article. I do wish they would have expanded it and told which SF fell into which categories. That would have been enlightening!

I look out at the normies saying nothing staring at each other and the mobs flocking to the big SALE to buy things they have been told they need.

I was at a movie theatre. I like to sit in the third row back from the screen.

Being a weekday matinee there were not many people there. It was the usual the back rows were full. All of the people sitting there were making the same face and assuming the same posture when I looked back at them when the lights went up. A cheese look of we are the same special group and you are not part of it.

It is a disturbing behaviour they have. I call it mind linking. If one of them were to attack me the rest would follow. Screaming freak or chasing me with pitch forks and torches. Humans are pack animals. Predatory pack animals. It is always the same.

Does my mind operate on a different frequency? They can not find me. I can find them no matter how hard they try and hide. Am I a superior predator? Am I part of a subspecies lacking there I am here signal? Why do others follow me? Am I The mad Messiah? So many questions.

I see the behaviour so that means I do not participate in it. It also means that I can use it. Therefore I am not normal. It leaves me left out of things. I have to fight for everything. It is acceptable to me. I would rather be an outcast than part of the programmed mob.

I wear shock value clothes exposing myself to barely legal. I want to make society uncomfortable."Fuck you!" In fabric and ink! Scary Gothic Lolita is every day and Sophisticate Lolita for business. I make fun clothes.

Being tied up and tortured is an endurance sport for me and I love it. None of this is normal based on social norms. The worst is I have no interest in playing follow the leader. I make up my own mind and believe in what I want the way I want. This is not normal.

I am a freak in this society and I accept that and function in it. Looking weird and doing my thing. ECCENTRIC!!! is the polite term.

I do not judge and expect to be judged.

So is your med fet normal? Is it socially acceptable? Absolutely not. Do not feel the need to justify your desire to society. Just practice your lifestyle. It is YOUR normal

Just think before going public with it. There may be a price.

Those who decide on what is socially acceptable can just get stuffed.

Go ahead and have your fun and don't concern yourself with them.

There are plenty of crafters and merchants that cater to our normal and supply what we need to live it so that says something.

Dare to be different and explore.

Normal is just a setting on the washing machine. 😃

https://academic.oup.com/jsm/article/12/2/328/6980029?login=true

I looked at the full version of this, and the closest they come to asking about medical fetishism is in the broad category of "fetishism," under which they group all "specific clothing, fabrics, costumes, and role playing." 27% of responders, with about an even split between men and women, answered yes to the question "I have fantasized about having sex with a fetish or non-sexual object."

I imagine that specific medical kink makes up a much smaller portion of that percentage.

I agree with others that medical fetishism certainly isn't "normal." It's somewhat rare. But having fetishistic desires isn't all that uncommon. For me, what makes this kink special is that it isn't super prevalent.

@LordJim2 - RIGHT ON, bro!!!

What is "normal" these days? After the past couple of years can anyone actually define the word normal?

What is "normal" these days? After the past couple of years can anyone actually define the word normal?

Being prudish and offended by sexual matters, even by sexual education and gender preference has, unfortunately become normal.

@Elizabeth2010

After the past couple of years can anyone actually define the word normal?

I will take a shot at it.

Conforming through state-approved fear campaigns and dictated social behaviors.

or Just saying fuck it and going about business as usual unmoved ignoring the above State approved fear campaign and behaviors.

Welcome, to bedlam where no one knows what is going on and fewer even care because it's just one big collapsing fucked up mess. I think that's the one I am going with. Bedlam

It’s taken me a long time to get comfortable with myself, knowing that I have the interests I do. I spent years feeling awkward .

That's the way i spent 35 years with my jockstrap fetish. Then finally i embraced it and became an exhibitionist about it.

"Don't judge me!" he shouted. after being seen typing in BDSM************** as is password.

Talk about self-determination to be singled out for special treatment. Anyone that puts something like that in just needs to be kicked around. They love it so much.

I have a Program on my work computer to do IT Administrator that gives me everyone's passwords to everything. I even know where they go on the net. So be wary of what you put in there. Nothing on your work computer is private.

My favorite is FuHe11ie!! That is my name. Hellie.

I was tempted to do some research but resisted and will just say what a normal person is to me. I'd say a normal person is one who by and large lives a contented life. To achieve that, at a minimum, one needs to be able to support oneself, maintain a household, and enjoy relationships with other humans. The chance of living a relatively contented existence without these skills is just vanishingly small in my experience. Note I'm not saying one can conceivably be happy all the time, but a mostly contented life certainly is. Normal behavior, then, is just behavior that supports a generally pleasing life. I think having kinks in no way precludes a happy life. It would do so if, because of your kinky behavior you lost your job or relationships. But then we'd be talking about an addiction, way beyond kinkiness as most of us experience it I'd think. Just my opinion.

Prior to joining Zity four years ago, I was almost certain I would never run into any people during my life who have the same lifelong ‘hangup’ on a simple medical diagnostic device and procedure that I was likely imprinted with the first time a thermometer ever entered my bottom on the day of my birth, and every subsequent rectal temp taken and remembered thereafter.

Rectal temps naturally segued to “other things” bottom related, including “taking it” up my ass. As an open mind straight man, it feels so good to have something in my ass as an adult, that I’ve accepted taking another man’s erection into it on several occasions, my only regret being that I didn’t allow it to happen more than I did when I could.

I wouldn’t call any of this “normal,” but a lot more people would probably enjoy it if they allowed their natural curiosity to explore, and isn’t that what life is about?

My secondary interest of things gynecological came to me during my early thirties after taking my girlfriend to her first appointment. It happened to be in an exam room that I had recently built as a subcontractor. For some reason it being in the new medical specialists building that I helped build made the experience a very erotic one for me. As I sat in the small adjoining waiting room hearing the mechanical sounds of the leg rests as they were pulled out and fastened into place, drawers sliding, and the muffled sounds of my girlfriend and her doctor talking gave me an extremely solid erection that would not go down, and was difficult to conceal as her appointment conclude and we exited the facility. On our trip home she gave me a play by play of what happened while giving me a slow and satisfying handjob. Besides most mens’ curiosity of what happens during a gyno visit, that really sealed the deal for me for that particular fetish.

I have a friend who is a professor of psychological science whose daughter just turned sweet sixteen, he and her mother gifted her a set of porn DVDs, a set of gauged butt plugs, tubes of surgical jelly, several personal massage devices, along with various erotic books on different fetishes. While there was a normal bit of winking and giggling that happened, they are a very open family about sexuality, and except for those gifts, it was a normal sixteen-year-old girl’s birthday party. In their family, if anything sexual is not harmful, and can be done safely, it’s met head-on and encouraged as being normal, and that seems like a healthy way to raise a family to me.

I don’t think we really want every kink and fetish to be the norm do we?

If that were the case, kinks and fetishes would cease to exist.

Kinks are relative and subjective desires; I would not go as far as “normal” though, at least not for most of us, and I think we prefer it this way.

I don’t think we really want every kink and fetish to be the norm do we?

If that were the case, kinks and fetishes would cease to exist.

It's not a question of fetishes being the norm (although you may not remember a time when oral sex was considered a slightly abnormal practice, I do remember, finding many books and articles on the subject when I was young as if it were a newly discovered sexual practice).

It is however a question of how fetishes and kinks are considered to be a normal deviation from average sexual norms and how much they can come to be considered harmful to society in general. In other words, we certainly don't wish for the times when things like ill defined practices like 'sodomy' and 'unnatural sex' were in the criminal code in many places. Not to mention miscegenation or interracial sex. And cross-dressing to give another example. Imagine now being arrested for cross-dressing and in private venues no less.

Don't forget there was a time when such things were quite illegal.

It occurred to me that one of the reasons we of the Zity community feel so outside the bounds of normalcy is that we are constantly comparing our insides with other people's outsides. We have no idea what lies within the minds of most people we see on the streets or in our workplace every day. Not one person in a million would openly share the kinds of thoughts that we on Zity share openly amongst ourselves every day. Zity is an amazingly open community. Amazing!

Not one person in a million would openly share the kinds of thoughts that we on Zity share openly amongst ourselves every day.

That is indeed the problem, because if we did, we'd be thought a bunch of perverts. I've tried and hinted often enough with friends to start a conversation on the subject, on any sexual subject actually and nothing ever comes of it.

I'll probably get chastised, but the earlier comments around medical or other uncommon desires not being normal is a rather absurd distortion of the meaning of normal. The whole world of statical analysis is really hard stuff to get excited about but if you simply imagine the principals involved in the gaussian curve ( bell curve) you arrive at a very different meaning.

The curve is extremely reliable, even in terms of attitudes and ways of thinking, aside from more concrete physical characteristics. The basics are that 50% of something falls in the middle of the bell, with 15% and 10% on either side of the middle 50. So if you measure a person's height across a given population you end up with 50% of people at one range and everyone else taller or shorter. The 10% are not abnormal, they simply are not within the median range of normal. When it comes to a genetic or hormonal anomaly like dwarfism or giantism you are not viewing this in terms of an absolute anomaly of the bell curve so I suppose you could deem those "conditions" abnormal since an external factor has moved them to one extreme end or another of the curve.

If you apply the curve to a social norm...let's say that hypothetically 50% of the population is neutral regarding sexual fantasies of any kind and are considered the societal middle ground of "normal" you are still going to have 25% that fall into some level progressing to being obsessed with sexual fantasies, and on the other end 25% that progress to some level of being unfavorable of or horrifically opposed to sexual fantasy. And that entire spectrum makes up the bell curve. The abnormal label is a bit more difficult than measuring height....but outside the curve you would encounter attitudes where you demand that everyone engage in your specific sexual fantasy or demand that all of society abstains from sex entirely....that's going to count as abnormal any way you slice it.

Let's take a real life medical example - the most common position of the uterus is anteverted. Less common is retroversion. And then anteflexion and retroflexion. So which position is "normal" Would you call any of the other positions "abnormal" Do you really want to label any of those positions as abnormal?

I get the prior point on how society imposes certain viewpoints over the course of time but I'd dare say that the current trend of a minority position being used to bludgeon the middle ground is even more dangerous than times that preceded us. What if women with retroflexed uteruses began screaming at all the women with anteverted uteruses, demanding that businesses only hire women with retroflexed uteruses, forbidding colleges to teach medical students that there are 5 different positions the uterus can locate, erasing the word anteverted from vocabulary, declaring that only women with retroflexed uteruses can give birth and that hospitals must turn away or terminate pregnancies of all women with anteverted uteruses. and that sex is banned between a man and an antevert. And like a bunch of absolute idiots society jumps on the side of the retroflexed and summarily condemns the anteverts in some sort of hysterical pagan dance of virtue because they are desperate to be seen as "normal" by the 10% retroflexed.

Get a grip ... stop worrying about what person x y or z thinks as long as you are not imposing your sexual preference, fantasy, whatever, on someone else and as long as you are not using your fantasy to harm someone else. And don't worry that your medical interests are not and will not be in the middle 50%, don't think they ever will be. And if you try to force your opinions and desires on everyone else you eventually have a massive backlash with the opposite outcome you are hoping for. I'm quite happy to carry on with my own medical interests as a very niche hobby that most won't take up but with those who do it's been quite enjoyable. Never worried about it, don't care who approves or does not approve, and if I did I would have probably grown quite disinterested long ago. I'd rather be known for being highly successful, in private highly erotic, and quite content in life.

I never Felt that it was abnormal in any sense. Growing up I realized I was aroused by medical text books and pictures of examinations. It wasn’t until I was Around19/20 that I realized That a large number of people also felt the same way. I discovered Zity in my early 20s and and it was then that I realized I had An actual fetish.