Mom and first exam

Yea, my mom went with me. It was kind of embarrassing but I was also happy to have her there for my first time. I feel it depends on your relationship with your mom if it is a positive or negative thing for her to be there. Overall, for my first time, I preferred her being there. It's a little scary when it's your first time so having your mom there kind of made me feel a lot better. Plus it's not like I wasn't well covered or anything.

Man, I cannot imagine my dad being in the room for my first physical when I got a genital and rectal exam. I would've been mortified had that happened.

"Son, you've outgrown the pediatrician so I've made you an appointment with my internist. I'll be with you in the room for your exam."

Uh, no thanks......

But more power to those of you who took some comfort in your mother's being in the exam room with you for your first Gyn experience.

Man, I cannot imagine my dad being in the room for my first physical when I got a genital and rectal exam. I would've been mortified had that happened.

I agree 100% KC Patient! There's no way I would have wanted either of my parents in the exam room when I had my first "big boy" exam! Or any exam like that for that matter. But I guess it's different for moms and daughters. However, my wife opted not to have her mom in the exam room when she had her first pelvic exam.

In overheard my wife telling one of her friends years ago that a college roommate drug her to the university health services for her first gynecologist appointment so she could get on the pill.

Years later, when we were out of college, we were in a wine tasting group with that same doctor.

I was definitely alone. There was no way I wanted my mom in the room for a gyno exam. She didn't even know I was going.

I was with my Boyfriend. I never would have allowed my mother being there.

My mom prepped me and took me to one of her exams when I was younger before I had my first "adult" exam. However I was on my own when it came time for my first gyn exam. That would have been too embarrassing to have her there when they asked various questions about development and behaviors that I was doing.

My mom went with me but stayed in the waiting room.

What typical Jewish Mother could resist such an opportunity! Yeah ... mine insisted on being with me. At 12 I guess she thought all sorts of horrible things would be divulged by her daughter who was there for menstrual problems, not by desire at all!

When it came time for my girls, I offered, they accepted, but I also told them there would come a time in the Q&A where they would probably want to be alone and that I preferred they were. They did want me present for the rest of the consult and the complete exam.

My mother took me to her gynecologist for my first gyn appointment and she waited in the waiting room during the exam.

I took my daughters to my OBGYN who was the doc who delivered them and I waited in the waiting room. That was really a "full circle" experience!

I took my daughters to my OBGYN who was the doc who delivered them and I waited in the waiting room. That was really a "full circle" experience!

Do you think the obgyn is young enough to deliver and then care for them when older for 3rd generation?

Do you think the obgyn is young enough to deliver and then care for them when older for 3rd generation?

Probably, assuming the girls become pregnant by age 30. My older daughter is 23 and I doubt will be pregnant before she is 28-ish due to her career. The younger is 20 and has a year and a half of college plus five more years for her PhD, so IF her current BF stays with her and moves to where ever she goes to school, and IF she marries her current BF of five years, she will probably be at least 29-30 by the time she has her academic position and IF they both stay in the NY NJ CT metro area, our OBGYN will most likely still be in practice. He is in his mid fifties now.

Wow well all best for her pending PhD must be proud.

I wonder what record for most generations of one family delivered under one dr.

Was your moms, your first also a male?

Her PhD isn't exactly pending yet. She has to graduate college first. She will apply over the summer.

My mother's OBGYN who delivered me is not the same OBGYN who I saw once I was in graduate school and who delivered and see my daughters.

Yes, my mom accompanied me, as I was rather apprehensive though fully aware of what the examination would involve. Still, it was a lot to absorb and experience at 17. Thankfully, it was with my doctor who just included the gyn aspects of the exam this time around. When older, I then switched to a gyno doc.

Julie

Seems like I’m in the majority here...my mom went with me but waited in the waiting room (thank goodness).

My mom never went with me when I had my first exam.

She would have been so annoying if I brought her. I didn't go until I was 21.

My mom waited in the waiting room, though she made some comments about how it’ll feel weird and to squeeze something? Idk. I was 16 and had some resentful feelings towards her at that point so I was just trying to ignore her.

My mom was in another state with her husband. I first went to the Clinic at UCLA. I think i was 19 then. I will ask my daughter who is going there if there is still a place at UCLA where she can go. I know UCLA has a great medical network. I see it all over the LA area and since my husband and I are paying out the butt for her education I would think she has that option.

Everything I have heard and learned tells me that having mom in the room for the first (or subsequent) exams is generally not a good idea. It makes things more awkward and embarrassing for the patient... and makes her perhaps not answer all of the doctors in a complete and honest way.

The place for mom is in the Waiting Room...

Doc Geoff

My mom was not even aware that I was going for my first exam. (No health insurance growing up, so no way for her to know about it through that avenue.) I just called a local group of doctors and got assigned to one who was currently accepting new patients. Fortunately, I LOVE him as a doctor and haven't changed in 18 years. He's in his early 60s and I'm hoping he doesn't retire anytime soon!

I think it would have been too weird to have my mom with me. She knows now that I go for an annual exam, but we don't ever discuss details or anything like that.

Mom came with me for the appointment but thankfully she was in the waiting room and not in the exam room. It would have been very embarrassing if anyone else would have been present, even if it was mom.

My mom had already passed away by the time I went, so I was by myself. But even if the circumstances had been different, I think I still would have gone by myself. I usually keep health care stuff private.

My mom attended me to the gyn office. She was waiting in the waiting room during my examination.

But a nurse was present during my exams.

My mom drove me but waited in the waiting room. She did not come into the exam room with me.

My aunt went with me when I was 15. She was my guardian at the time. I had no idea what was going to happen until I was given a gown, told to undress and then told the doctor was going to check my vagina. I wasn't asked whether I wanted my aunt there. She watched the whole pelvic exam.

I'm glad the doctor didn't also do a breast exam with my aunt there. It was awkward enough with her watching the pelvic exam. I didn't think that until later because I didn't know that some doctors checked young girls' breasts. I didn't have anymore gyn exams until I was 18 and I went by myself.

My aunt went with me when I was 15. She was my guardian at the time. I had no idea what was going to happen until I was given a gown, told to undress and then told the doctor was going to check my vagina. I wasn't asked whether I wanted my aunt there. She watched the whole pelvic exam.

I'm glad the doctor didn't also do a breast exam with my aunt there. It was awkward enough with her watching the pelvic exam. I didn't think that until later because I didn't know that some doctors checked young girls' breasts. I didn't have anymore gyn exams until I was 18 and I went by myself.

Hey @CassieST ,

When you say she watched the whole exam, do you mean – from a position up by your head where she could offer support? Or was she sitting in a place where she would see everything that was going on?

It's a shame you weren't asked whether you wanted her with you or not. I can see a doctor assuming that a younger woman at her first exam would want someone there for support, but that's definitely something that should be offered – not assumed.

-g

@gflin, She was standing slightly behind the doctor. I don't even remember what the doctor said to me, I just remember her standing there watching.

Wow. Standing … behind … the doctor. That's not providing support, that's spectating.

No wonder you felt uncomfortable! I'm sorry your first experience was uncomfortable like that, but it sounds like you made adjustments and aren't feeling any more awkward than the average patient now, fortunately.

Thanks for answering.

-g

Mom took me to her gynie at 15/16. He was a neighbour who i knew was a Dr but I didn't know he was that sort of Dr! Sooo embarrassing to have him do the exam in front of mom.