The most horribly nervous I ever got before a physical examination was at Grammar School in 1965 when I was 13. Looking back now I know it was all because of my gauche naievity. Just turned 13, teen hormones raging - but in an ultra repressive school regime and a general society / home background where anything to do with sex was strictly taboo. There was a lot of ignorance etc.
As ever, I was one of only a handful of boys in my year to have a medical in 1965. I knew the date and approx time, having returned the mandatory parental consent letter / form. I had school medicals every year. I never got blase about them, but I knew what to expect. I was always a bit nervous / anxious..but always slightly excited too. But, now adolescent, I was much more awkwardly self - conscious. So my feelings that particular morning were quite 'normal'. Schoolwork kept your mind off it anyway.
All of that changed during morning break....and how. One of my best friends rushed over with two other boys I knew. They were in an extremely high sense of excitement. Boys being boys.....I sensed there was....something...something not good for me. "You've got a medical after break, haven't you?", my friend said, giggling.
"Yes. You know I have. So?" (I was a bit puzzled).
My friend sort of hugged himself with glee and spoke to the other boys who were sniggering."Oh, go on..,,tell him..tell him!"
"Shall I?" ( spluttering with laughter ).."Or should it just be a surprise?"
"Tell me what?"( exasperated - cue more sniggering)."Go on, tell him!!"
"All right", one of the other boys said. "My brother had a medical before break.."( I knew he had a brother). "So?" ( gales of laughter . "The doctor....the doctor is a woman!! (Hysterical laughter). The comments came thick and fast.." Yeah. You'll be in the nuddy. Get your clothes off , boy!! She'll be feeling your balls. Holding your cock. A woman. Don't get a stiffie. You'll be in big trouble. Ask her to wank you."
" Shut up! Shut up!" I found myself yelling at them. I realised I was shaking. The school bell sounded...only 30 minutes until my medical. My head was literally spinning, thoughts crashing around my head. My heart was pounding. Sensing my horrible discomfiture my friends ran off, shouting over their shoulders " Strip naked....I want to feel your cock.,,"(screeching laughter).
I genuinely felt sick, genuinely. My stomach was churning. I could not concentrate on the lesson ( French dictation) at all. I did so appallingly (all I could tnink of...with dread was the fast approaching medical ) that I was slippered. That did not improve my already fragile mood. Finally, a school prefect arrived to take me down to the examination room. I felt physically ill as I sat waiting on the chair outside. My throat had gone dry, my heart was racing. As the door opened and the previous boy came out, the strained look on his face spoke volumes.
The first part of the exam was almost the same and passed by with me in a sort of trance. The doctor was indeed a woman. Very professional. Quite young and attractive. I was terrified as the moment to strip naked approached. Terrified is not too strong a word. She obviously sensed my fear / tension / hesitancy / reluctance (Plus....a long story and definitely for another thread....there had been a recent incident of a sexual nature and the boy concerned had been severely / publicly caned and expelled)..so the doctor tried to reassure me..,the usual platitudes..she was a doctor..not to worry if I was shy.,she had seen hundreds of men and boys with no clothes on.,etc., etc.
I knew I had to strip. It felt awful. I tried to block out all thoughts and feelings as she inspected my anus and genitals. It was not sexual..butI had never been touched by a female. As she palpated my balls and felt up/ gently squeezed my pènis....I sickeningly realised I was beginning to get erect. I was mortified and anguished. I got semi -erect. The doctor did not bat an eyelid.
A moment later she pronounced that everything was fine and that I could get dressed. I realised that tears were trickling down my face. I was convinced that I would be reported for obscene behaviour, horribly caned and thrown out of the school. Again, she sensed something was wrong. "Whatever's the matter?" she spoke kindly. I almost sobbed and sort of indicated my penis."Please don't tell the Headmaster...please..I'm sorry...I.."
"My dear boy."( she laughed..but not unkindly)."Don't be so silly. You are just a perfectly normal, polite boy. You haven't done anything wrong. Nothing. Nothing to worry about. Now, just get dressed quickly and run along, there's a good lad." I did, but despite her reassurances I was still worried sick for the next fortnight or so...And I still had to face down my schoolfriends.