My first experiences were rather horrific. I was with a man who didn't know the first thing about beint Dominant. Complete disregard for limits, not responding to safety words, and being completely ignorant of the effect of this complete abuse to my psychological well being.
Needless to say, he's no longer in the picture.
Now I switch with my husband, and it's all about the communication, mutual respect, and of course pure enjoyment! While he's not much of a sub, he does love being tied up and spanked/whipped. And I get to surrender with him, to a certain degree...he still can't "hurt" his wife....lol...but he will tie me up, give me enemas, fisting, the like.....
Hoping to find a Dominant female one day that can accomodate both our needs...