Embarrassment vs. Humiliation

Http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Humiliation

Here's an interesting definition. Notice the last part. I think that's were it plays in to our fetish.

Humiliation (also called stultification) is the abasement of pride, which creates mortification or leads to a state of being humbled or reduced to lowliness or submission. It can be brought about through bullying, intimidation, physical or mental mistreatment or trickery, or by embarrassment if a person is revealed to have committed a socially or legally unacceptable act. Whereas humility can be sought alone as a means to de-emphasise the ego, humiliation must involve other person(s), though not necessarily directly or willingly. Acting to humiliate yourself may be linked to a personal belief (as with mortification of the flesh, with some religions), or it can be part of erotic humiliation where the belittling activity provides emotional and/or sexual arousal or heightened sensation.

I like the original post's definition of embarrassment and humiliation here, and personally, while I like embarrassment, I cannot stand humiliation, which is why I've never liked much mainstream BDSM.

Personally, undressing in front of an attractive female doctor/nurse gets my heart going.

Being called a useless slut and being told to lick the floor....while some may enjoy that, I, erm, don't. Full stop. Sorry guys, just not my cup of tea.

DB wrote: "I have often seen queues of my students lined up waiting in the corridor waiting for their school medical exams. You can sense the embarrassment AND the excitement!"

you are not serious or give us more details about the circumstances in which you have seen a lot of students lining up naked?

As regards the difference betweeen humiliation and embarrassment, I think that I can give an example.

when I was young and I have physicals in schools, I was embarrassed to undress until underweear, at that time, the last 50's and beguinning 60's it was only white briefs, in a locker room in front of classmates and a monitor or the PE teacher, I was of course also embarrassed during the physicals because of the presence of a nurse and a lady doctor even if I did not prefer to have a male doctor who could be more rough with us.

If my mother was present during a medical exam at a doctor's office, I was also embarrassed but it did not occur often in my memory.

When I was 18 age, I had to go to a pre-induction center for physicals to know if I was fit for the mandatory military service.

Here we had to take first a gang shower in a large group standing naked so closely to each other that we could not avoid to touch the chjeeks of the guy who was in the row before or being touched by the guy who was in the row behind, all under the control of sergeants, that was humiliating.

Then, we underwent the physicals undressed for nearly a morning, we were naked in a large group without any privacy, any respect of our feeling of modesty,we were examined in plain view of each other and of a lot of persons present in the corridor where we should stand lining up completely naked before entering the large exam room or in the exam room itself: sergeants or officers, medics, doctors, we were permanently hurried up, bawled out, and ordederd to obey all instructions without discussion and without asking any question.

Some intimates exams such as check hernia, examination of penis and balls, visual inspection of the rectum, digital rectal area being on all fours on a medical table, were performed in a large exam room with many spectators. And when waiting for our turn, some of us recieved a slap at the buttocks by sergeants or also by doctors during the examination when instructed to turn around or to bend over or after to straight up again and a real whack at the end of the examination.

that was really humiliating!

So for me, there is a great difference between an embarrassment and a humiliation in medical exams

Here we had to take first a gang shower in a large group...

...Then, we underwent the physicals undressed for nearly a morning, we were naked in a large group without any privacy...

Now that's hot! Thanks for sharing.

I agree with the majority of posters on what the difference is... but I wonder where the embarrassment originated? Are we women supposed to feel embarrassed - hence the gown to cover for privacy? What privacy? The doctor is going to see what he needs any way and do what he needs to do.

It seems it is designed to make the patients be critical/embarrassed of themselves... our bodies. Would it be acceptable for me to ask to not wear a gown or sheet during a true medical exam? I think I would feel more comfortable had the cover-up items never been handed out for such intimate exams... it sort of feels like having sex in the dark, buried under lots of covers and never allowing my eyes to see what should be treasured.

The turn on for me during exam play is knowing that ive caused embaressment to the patient. I do procedures and use positions for the patient that does this. I dont think I would be aroused knowing that the person felt humiliated and degraded.

Esaterman's sharing of a military physical would be the ultimate in humiliating experiences for me. It seems to me from what other men have shared about being in the military that humiliation is used a lot to break one down so the chain of command is followed without question. Humiliation strikes at and diminishes the core of a person while embarrassment carasses the surface.

Its seems that way to me as well Reba, but I think guys are more comfortable with being nude around each other than women, or they are just more used to it. Men's restrooms are more open, and they use the restroom standing next to each other. Men's locker rooms or open, and they are used to undressing, dressing, and showering with each other. But I do have to agree that the military experience would be humiliating to those that are not used to the nudity.

I agree with the definitions, and that the excitement comes from embarrassment

Medroticguy, I agree with your definitions of humiliation and embarrassment. I've been embarrassed during a real exam but never made to feel humiliated.

Good description.

Yes to me they are very different. Embarrassment is what I have always craved as part of this interest. It is sweet and erotic.

I think we all feel a certain amount of embarrasment during an exam especially unclothed or partially so.

Humiliation is caused by someone doing something beyond what is necessary.

In play medfet, the couple should set the boundaries so as not to be humiliated.

I think a little embarrassment in a play situation just enhances the moment but I would never want to humiliate anyone in play or real life.

Embarrassment is the thing that excites me. I like to think how embarrassing it was to have the genital/hernia/rectal exams.

I am all for the embarrassment. I think it can be very powerful in erotic play of any kind. I know there are a lot of people who are into the humiliation side of things but that isn't for me. I wouldn't want to know that anybody was humiliated in the process of helping me get satisfaction from erotic play.

Unfortunately many of us use the term interchangebly and it adds to some confusion. It really is the embarassment I seek.

I think, you have to make difference between a real exam and a play exam.

During a real exam the doctor could not do anything, what could damage the patient’s dignity.

During a play exam the doctor has to work according to the scenario agreed with the patient. If the patient agrees with some humiliating elements or he self wants some humiliating elements were applied, then those elements which are usually considered as humiliating, are moved to the "only-embarrasing" platform.

An example: The patient is to urinate in front of the doctor/nurse.

It can be a part of the REAL exam (drug tests, anti-doping tests...). Then it is considered as a humiliating factor. But during a play exam, if the patient wants the doctor to order it, you can consider it as very exciting.

For me it's the embarrassment that is exciting. I'm a bit of an exhibitionist so when my doctor orders me to remove my cloths as he watches, the embarrassment of enjoying it causes tremendous arousal.

I agree with the definitions.

Embarassment is definitely best

humiliation takes away the sense of arousal and is less erotic then embarassment

I would enjoy being enbarrassed. Humiliation is a finer line. It can be fun to be humiliated, but, also, not so much fun.

I love being embarrassed!

The thought of lying there, totally naked, having the most intimate examination possible and in walks a complete stranger!

The stranger starts to talk to the doctor and nurse, but ignores you, as if you're not in the room. The examination continues as if nothing has happened, but with the spectator watching everything that's happening to you. Your most intimate secrets, measurements, everything, laid out in front of this uninvited guest...

Now that's a turn on.

I would agree that embarrassment can be a turn on. It would also be hot to have a group physical with someone in better shape so that there is a little bit of humiliation involved.

I agree with the original poster's definition although I think there is a fine line still, and I don't find embarrassment exciting at all. A real examination setting is embarrassing and normally not humiliating - and this is exactly why play is play and therefore pleasant and real is just a necessity and nothing I look forward to. I can on an intellectual level understand that the idea of embarrassment is a turn-on for many, yet I do not understand why genuine embarrassment is so sought after.

Very interesting topic... always assumed that it was humiliation for me, but going by the thread probably more embarrassing. however where is the line between to two? to have a thorogh exam in group with others (which would love to do!) would for me be humiliating

I find the embarrassment of an examination extremely arousing. The thought of having a female nurse and doctor checking my entire naked body and feeling me is very erotic. Humiliation can be erotic also but I prefer to merely be embarrassed by the doctor probing my body.

Embarrassment in its more extreme form leads to humiliation. Similar to the level of pain that is pleasurable for different people, different levels of being embarrassed or being humiliated can be arousing to different people. As long as the giving and the receiving partner agree on what is good for them, I suppose it's just fine. And I guess the line between a turn-on and a serious turn-off situation can be very, very thin. Not to cross it needs a lot of listening to one another and a good understanding of my partner's psyche.

Talking about almost impossible challenges...

:-)

Thanks for raising this. As many have said humiliation can lead on to embarrassment and it is all about what that person is looking to get from a play exam. I think in a professional environment any kind of humiliation is a gross misconduct as a patient should always be treated with respect.

Personally I find the embarrassment a turn on, being exposed, having others see me in a revealing position, it's all part of the fun. I can understand why some people would want to go further than that into the realms of humiliation but it is definitely just for the play exam and also not for me!

Thinking back to my adolescence, embarrassment was pulling down my pants for an injection; humiliation was bending over the receptionist's lap to get it.