I care very much about other peoples' opinions - too much, probably - and that extends to after I die. After a lifetime of being outwardly straight, I'm afraid any of my friends and relatives would be shocked and disgusted to find my suppositories, enema stuff and anal toys. Then there's the SSD on my office computer with videos and fiction that would be equally disturbing. It is a constant low level anxiety. Gotta come up with a plan soon.
Ok so i too have a lot of naughty personal home videos and photos of me and the wife that we shoot ever since 25 years go, i have them all stored on 2 small SD Cards that i have hidden in our home where nobody will ever think to look, and i mean nobody will find them, so if i die, they will die with me, however i do have what is known as an online cloud storage service with a company called “IceDrive” and i pay $49 per year for 1tb of online storage, and i have uploaded all those videos and photos into my cloud storage, and they are sync'd to my laptop so that i can access them whenever i want while my laptop is turned on, if it is turned off my cloud service folder will disappear from my laptop, and only i know my login name and password to access the files if my laptop is turned back on by someone else, so this means that if i die, nobody can ever access those same files from my laptop either.
As far as your toys and other personal things go, well that is a different problem as these are physical items that you probably use on a regular basis, so you need to have them stored somewhere close by, so in the reality of it all, maybe you can never really hide them completely.
Anyway, once you die, you die, why would you worry so much now what others will say or think about you.