Morning Enema

I am NEVER constipated. As a matter of fact part of my morning routine is a good dump right after breakfast. Well, this morning, I felt a trememdous urge before breakfast. Not wanting to be distracted while I ate, I went to the john. Tremendous urge, tiny poop! "Well, that's odd. Guess I'll go eat." Well, the moment I took the last bite --another tremendous urge. Rushed to the can. Much straining, tiny poop. As I started getting my clothes ready for work, I just felt out of sorts. "Maybe an enema would help." Usually an enema session for me is when my wife is away and amounts to two or three bags at a leisurely pace. A whole evening. This morning, she was already gone. "How about a quick enema?" I have rheumatoid arthritis, so mornings are rough and getting up and down from the Simms position was out of the question. So, I got my shower chair and sat it by the commode. I filled the drugstore combination syringe with clear, warm water; put on the douche nozzle drilled on the end for better flow; lubed up with a pleasant cocoa butter handcream; sat on the shower chair backward with my ass hanging off and got started. After only a third of a bag I needed to go --probably because I was sitting up. Well, I went and then came back for the rest of the bag. Inserted the nozzle without re-lubing --the harder it is to get it in, the harder it is for it to slip out. I sat there, hands-off, and let it run in from hanging high on my shower door. It felt really good. When it was all in, I eased the nozzle out until the bulb end was planted against the inside of my ass, like a small stopper. I just relaxed for about ten minutes, then let it out until I sort of reached a stopping place. Wiped, flushed and got up and shaved, and dried my equipment and put it away. Then came the final urge. I sat down and had a very satisfying emptying. I put the chair back in the shower, sat down for a nice hot shower and pounded my pud. What a great way to start the day! I relearned that a simple one-bagger can really have a nice effect on your sense of well-being. Enemas don't have to be a big production to be very good.

As a follow-up,I forgot to mention that I didn't turn out to be constipated this morning. Even with the enema, I didn't drop a single turd, just nasty liquid. I was just not F.O.S. as I usually am in the morning. So, I recon the good, healthy feeling came from "getting the poision out of my system" just like Mom used to say. I think I'll use the left over coffee next time.