I felt myself being pulled out of my body and toward the ceiling. I looked down and saw myself lying on a table. A tube in my mouth was attached to a respirator. I had IVs running into my hand. I could see multiple bags, including one that was red. I was attached to a cardiac monitor. There was an open incision just below my left rib cage. Medical personnel were all around me. The lines on the monitor were all over the place. Someone had defibrillator paddles in his hand. He placed them on me in the proper positions. “Clear!” he yelled. My body convulsed. The doctors looked at the monitor. No change. I looked up and over and saw Doc in the observation room. He was standing up with his palms against the glass window, watching what was going on below. Tears were running down his face.

Once again, I felt myself being pulled up, this time through the ceiling. I could no longer see what was happening below. I was set down on my feet. In front of me, I saw my mother, father, brother and sister as well as other relatives that had gone before. My Dad stepped forward and gave me a big hug. A feeling of peace and tranquility came over me. I had no pain for the first time in quite awhile. My Mom hugged me next, then my siblings.

“Meredith, you can’t stay”, Dad said.

“Why not?”

A man and woman stepped up to me. “It’s not your time, Meredith”, the man said.

“Who are you?”

“Gerald Richards. I’m Julian’s father. You have to go back, my son needs you.”

“I love Julian.”

“I know. And he loves you. More than he has been able to articulate.”

“Julian is a very intelligent and articulate man.”

“Yes, but when it comes to you, he can’t bring himself to say exactly how much you mean to him. He’s afraid you will leave him. It‘s the only area of his life where he‘s insecure, though he tries very hard not to show it.”

“What can I do to help?”

“Just be there for him. Show him you will always be there. Now, it’s time for you to go back. We will see you both when it’s your time to be here.”

I felt myself being pulled back down. My Dad spoke again. “You have to make sure that asshole Watters loses his licence and that bitch Jane is put behind bars for a long, long time, Meredith. Go kick some ass.”

“And, for God’s sake, stop being so damn stubborn!” my Mom called out.

Doc’s parents called in unison as I was pulled farther away “Tell Julian we love him!”

The next thing I remembered was pain. Godawful pain. In my side, in my chest, in my knee, in my groin, in my throat. I opened my eyes and looked around. There were curtains on both sides of me. The stretcher was up against a wall. I looked ahead of me and could see Doc talking to a nurse at the foot. I closed my eyes and drifted away.

When I came to again, the stretcher was being pushed down a hall. Doc was walking beside it with his hand on the side rail. He saw me open my eyes. “You’re being taken to your room, hon.”

“Pain.” I managed to utter in a voice that didn’t sound like my own.

“You’ll get some pain medication when you get to the ward. Hang in there, sweetie.” We were now in front of an elevator. He stroked my hair while we waited for it to arrive.

“What’s on my leg?” I felt something sitting on it.

“Just your chart.”

“Oh.”

The elevator came and we got on after some people got off. The motion of it going up made me feel like I was going to hurl, but there wasn’t anything in my stomach to come up. After what seemed like forever, it stopped and the stretcher was pulled off and taken down another corridor.

We finally arrived at my room. The stretcher was pushed up beside the bed, then lowered to the same height. Doc helped the porters lift me onto the bed and then he transferred my intravenous bags to the IV stand beside it. The porters left, taking the stretcher with them. A nurse approached and hooked me up to a cardiac monitor, then placed a pulse oximeter on my left forefinger.

“My name is Ellen and I’ll be your nurse for the night. Is there anything you need?” she asked as she programmed the IV stand.

“So much pain”, I said as she took her stethoscope from the back of her neck.

“I’ll get you some pain medication in a minute. First, I need to listen to your lungs and heart. Are you able to sit forward a bit?” Doc helped me sit up. Ellen placed her stethoscope on my back and asked me to take a deep breath. I tried, but wasn’t very successful. “Just do your best”, she said as she saw me struggling to breathe that deep. “Your SATS are pretty low.”

Next, she had me lie back and pulled my gown down over my breasts before listening to my heart. I gasped as I felt pain when she placed the diaphragm of her stethoscope between “the girls”. “Sorry, Meredith”, she said. “The paddles left burn marks, but I have to listen there. I’ll get some cream for them when I bring your pain medication.”

"Paddles?" I asked.

"Your surgeon will tell you about that.” When she finished the heart auscultation, she listened to all 4 quadrants of my abdomen. “How is everything?” Doc asked when she pulled the covers back up over me.

“I can’t tell you due to privacy rules”, she said.

“It’s okay with me, Ellen. He’s a doctor, I want him to know everything that is going on.”

“He’s your husband, right?”

“Common-law, yes.”

“You will need to sign a release. I’m not really supposed to say anything until it’s signed, but if you are okay with it, I’ll tell him now.”

“Yes, please do.”

Ellen looked at Doc. “Her lungs are clear, but her SATS are low - 78%. Her mitral clicks are very pronounced. Bowel sounds are present. I believe Dr Hunt is going to get a cardiac and pulmonary consult.”

“It’s normal for her SATS to fall after surgery”, Doc said to her. “But a consult is always welcome. You can also call her pulmonologist and cardiologist back home. I can give you their names and numbers.”

“That would be very helpful.”

Ellen left to go get me some pain medication and I said to Doc “Doc, are you okay? You got shot, right?”

“The bullet went through my leg, hon. I’m okay. They cleaned it out and stitched it up in the ER before they’d let me go upstairs.”

I breathed a sigh of relief. Memories of what had happened in the OR started to come to me in bits and pieces. I didn’t want to say anything to anyone for fear of them thinking I was losing my mind.

“Doc, did you watch the surgery?”

“Yes, when I got out of the ER, I went right up to the observation room.”

“What happened? Ellen said something about paddles.”

“Don’t worry about it, hon. I’ll tell you when you are feeling better.”

“Doc, tell me now, please!”

Just then, Ellen came back with a syringe and a clip board. “This is the consent form so we can talk to Julian.” I sat up as best as I could and took the clipboard and pen from her. “Just fill out his name and sign it.”

“I need to take this off my finger.”

“She’s left handed”, Doc said.

Ellen took the pulse ox off while I signed the form. She took the clip board back and injected the medication into my IV line.

“You look tired, Doc”, I said.

“I am.”

“Come lie down.”

“Visitors cannot sit or lie on a patient’s bed”, Ellen said in a firm voice.

“They allow it at the hospital at home.”

“You are not at that hospital, you are here and these are our rules. In fact, visiting hours were over at 8:30 and it’s almost midnight. He needs to say good night and leave.”

“Screw that!” I said. “If he leaves, I leave.”

“You can’t leave.”

“Wanna bet?”

“She will, trust me”, Doc said to the nurse. “She’s very stubborn. Even in the shape she‘s in right now, she will get out of bed and try to walk out.”

“I will consult with Dr Hunt and be back”, Ellen said with exasperation.

“Doc, I’m not staying if they won’t let you stay.”

“Meredith, I support you. I don’t like having to leave, but it’s their rules and I have to follow them. I’m going to see about getting you transferred to the hospital at home as soon as you can make the trip.” He had my stuffed horse in his hand and set it down beside me on the bed. I picked it up and held it to my chest - keeping it away from the burn marks.

“You are, Doc? Oh, that would be great!”

“Yes, I am. They won’t let me help with your care here either. I want you to be where I can do that. Now, rest your voice, hon.” I was talking barely above a whisper. He leaned over the rail and stroked my hair.

“Jane. Where’s Jane?”

“She’s behind bars. She won’t be a problem anymore.”

“They got her?”

“Yes. I’ll tell you about it tomorrow. Now go to sleep.”

The pain medication was taking effect and I drifted off.

I had a fitful sleep, despite the medication. I kept waking up and Doc wasn’t there, which distressed me. The second time, I pressed the call bell and Ellen came to find out what I wanted. I asked her where Doc was. “He left after you fell asleep. Dr Hunt would not give permission for him to stay. He will be back when visiting hours begin.”

“What time is that?”

“11am.”

I finally woke up to daylight. A nurse was changing my IV bag. She saw that I was awake and in a disgustingly cheerful voice said “Good morning, Meredith! I’m Stephanie, your nurse for the day. Your breakfast will be here shortly.”

“I’m not hungry.”

“I think it’s just fluids today. Try to manage some.”

“What time is it?”

“Just after 8:00.” Three hours until Doc could come visit. Damn. “Do you want your pain medication?”

“Yes, please.”

“I’ll be back with it and your other medications.” Other medications? Oh yeah, I remembered, I’m on medication for my MVP.

When the breakfast tray came, I took one look at it and gagged. I closed my eyes and eventually fell back asleep, but was woken up when Dr Hunt came in to my room. “I’m sorry to wake you up, Meredith, but I wanted to see how you are doing and I have to get over to my clinic for morning appointments. I‘m also sorry I couldn‘t let Julian stay last night, but hospital rules are we only let family stay when the patient is critically ill.”

“I understand about rules, but any chance of getting a transfer to the hospital back home?”

“You can’t travel yet.”

“When can I?”

“At least a couple days.” I sighed.

“How are you feeling?”

“So much pain.”

“That is why you can’t travel. Did they give you your morning meds yet?”

“Yes.”

“If you are still in a lot of pain, I can increase the dose a bit.”

“No, it’s okay. It makes me too drowsy.”

“Do you feel up to getting a report on the surgery?”

“Yes, please tell me what happened!”

“You lost a lot of blood. We had to give you a blood transfusion. You needed 6 units, which is quite a bit. I don’t know how you managed to get out of bed in the ER to try to fight that woman.”

“Fury, Dr Hunt. She’s caused a lot of problems for Julian and I.”

“Due to the blood loss, you went into ventricular fibrillation. We had to shock you three times to fix it. You are very lucky to be alive.”

“Were you able to stitch up my spleen?”

“No, I had to take it out. Like I said last night, you can live without it.”

“What about my bladder?”

“We put a catheter in and hopefully it will heal on it’s own. Is it uncomfortable?”

“A bit, yes. The other times I’ve had one weren’t.”

“That may go away in a day or two.”

“I hope so.”

I went back to sleep after he left. This time, I was not interrupted and awoke a few hours later to see Doc sitting in the chair beside my bed. He was watching my cardiac monitor. He must have noticed a change, because he looked at me. “Hi hon, did you sleep well?”

“No, I didn’t. I hate being away from you, I can never get a good sleep.”

“Same here, I tossed and turned all night.”

“Where did you go?”

“I took a cab to a hotel. Fortunately, my credit cards didn’t get cancelled for lack of payment.”

“Doc, you have an impeccable payment record. I’m sure they aren’t freaking out if you missed one.”

“This is true, Meredith. Anyway, I went to a bank and paid it before I came here.”

“I see you have new clothes on.”

“Yes, I picked some up at a men’s store. There seemed to be liquid sedative on my shirt and my pants had holes in them.”

“Gee, I wonder how that got on your shirt?” He laughed.

“I couldn’t believe you did that! I have to say, Meredith, you sure have spunk!”

“Is that a nice way of saying I’m a pain in the arse?”

“Maybe”, he replied with a wink. “Seriously, though, hon - your ’spunk’ saved our lives yesterday. “So no, you are not a pain in the arse, as you put it.” He stood up and leaned over the bed and gave me a kiss and a hug - as best as he could hug me over the rails.

“Your lunch tray is here. Did you have any breakfast?” I shook my head no. “You need to have some lunch. Have some broth, at least.”

I didn’t want any, but didn’t want to argue with Doc, especially since I felt bad for him having been shot, and having to leave at midnight last night. I took the cup from him and had a sip. I had had about a quarter of the cup when Dana came through the door. “Hey! She said, “is it ever good to see you!”

“You, too, Dana, but you should be home resting.”

“Nah, it’s just a few cuts. It takes a lot more than that to keep me down.”

“How is Randall?”

“He is fine. They kept him here overnight to make sure but they are letting him out this afternoon. I saw him before coming here to your room.”

“Do you know anything about what happened yesterday?” Doc asked her.

“Yes, but first let me assure you, Jane is behind bars. She’s in a holding cell right now and will be taken to a detention centre after her bail hearing tomorrow. The Crown is strongly opposing bail.”

“Oh, God, I hope she does not get bail.”

“I highly doubt she will, Meredith. She’s up on many, many charges, including at least one count of attempted murder from the incident before you came here to the safe house. There will be three more counts if we can prove she put or had someone put the bomb at the house yesterday. All that plus the fact she eluded police for so long makes her a flight risk.”

“I can’t believe that after her staying hidden for so long, she came to the hospital yesterday.”

“I think her anger got the best of her. Yes, she brought reinforcements, but she had to have known there was a very real chance she’d not be leaving the building a free woman. She was so pissed off at you eluding everything she’s thrown at you that she took the risk.”

“She almost had Meredith yesterday. She was down on the floor sitting on her chest and strangling her. Everyone started coughing and we all passed out.”

We all passed out? This was the first I was hearing about that. “What was that all about, Julian?”

“The police put something through the heat vent into the room”, Dana told me. “Once everyone was incapacitated, they stormed in and handcuffed Jane and her ‘friends’ and then everyone was taken out of the room.”

“Do you know how Jane found us?”

“No, I don’t. I did stop at the station before coming here and got up on the latest so that I could let you know. We don’t know how she found you but the detectives are looking into the records on the phones and laptops that we gave you. We do know that she did find you and an anonymous call was placed to the station yesterday saying that she was on her way in a Hummer with 4 others and that they all were heavily armed. You know that police pursued and shot at them with no result.

“Other officers went a different route and put spikes on the road. They ran right over them and had to stop a short distance later. We had snipers in bushes for a mile before the compound. They knew they were outgunned and surrendered. The police quickly ascertained that the woman was not Jane, meaning she was still loose. That’s when they called us at the house at the end of the corridor I took you down.

“The explosion *was* caused by a bomb. We suspect Jane, but can’t prove it yet. Hopefully, she will admit to it during questioning.”

“How would she know about that house?”

“I don’t know but I intend to find out. At any rate, you two don‘t have to worry about her being loose anymore.”

“What about the car that hit me?”

“The driver stopped. You don’t remember that?”

“No, I remember the explosion but things after that are foggy.”

“He stopped, he feels really bad, said he didn’t see you until the last minute. No charges are going to be laid.”

“Oh, good. It was my fault, not his. There was a gunshot in the ER before Jane came into my room. I hope nobody was hurt.”

“I don’t know what that was about, but I haven’t heard about any injuries other than Randall’s and Julian’s.”

“Where will Jane be while waiting trial?” Doc asked.

“I’m not sure, she’s wanted on a bunch of charges in your area, too. I don’t know if they will transfer the charges or not. If not, she’ll have to go back to appear in court. But do not worry about that, she will be in chains and cuffs and there will be a few officers escorting her.”

“Don’t underestimate her.”

“We won’t. I have to get going but I wanted to see you and let you know what happened. I’ll pop in again in a day or two.”

Nurse Ratchett, as I called her, made Doc leave at 8:30pm. Once again, I did not sleep well at all. I didn’t even have anything to amuse myself with. My phone and notebook were with the detectives back home. The electronics I had at the safe house did not belong to me. Ratchett….er, Ellen … came in at 3am and asked if I wanted a sleeping pill. I was going to refuse, then changed my mind. The rest of the night would go a lot faster if I was sleeping. While I waited for it to kick in, I vowed that come hell or high water, I would not spend another night without Doc.

I woke up to see Doc sitting in the chair beside the bed. “Is it after 11 already?” I asked.

“It’s 9:30. Dr Hunt called and asked me to come in early. He wants to talk to both of us.”

“Uh-oh. That sounds ominous.” He got out of his chair and leaned over the bed to give me a kiss.

My day nurse, Stephanie, came in with my morning medications. “I’m sorry I’m late, Meredith. We had an emergency on the ward and I was unable to do meds until now.”

“That’s okay, I was sleeping anyway. I just woke up.” After she left, I said to Doc “She’s so much nicer than Ratchett.”

“Who?”

“Nurse Ratchett - Ellen, the night nurse.”

“Meredith, you are bad!” he said with a laugh.

“Don’t make me laugh, Doc. It hurts too much. How did you sleep?”

“About the same as the night before.”

“Yeah - me, too. Ratchett gave me a sleeping pill at 3, that’s the only reason I was sleeping when you got here.”

“She should have given it to you hours before that.”

“Doc, one way or another, we are sleeping in the same bed tonight, even if I have to sign out and go to the hotel with you.”

“Let’s not get hasty, Meredith. You are in no shape to be out of hospital.” I didn’t want to admit it, but I knew he was right.

We chatted a bit until Dr Hunt arrived. “Do you still want to go to your local hospital?” he asked me.

“Yes!”

“You may get your wish sooner than we’d thought. We are almost at capacity and there’s been a very bad, multi vehicle accident on the highway. To be frank, we need the bed. The problem is getting a med flight on such short notice.”

“Flight? How about a car?”

“That is out of the question. You could go by ambulance but it’s much faster to fly.”

“She’s terrified of flying”, Doc told the surgeon. “She was very stressed getting here a few weeks ago. I had to give her a sedative.”

“I’m happy to prescribe one for the trip home.”

“I insist on being in charge of her medical care from the time we leave here until we get there.”

“You are her doctor at home, right?”

“Her ob/gyn and GP when needed. Her GP is out sick a lot.”

“Ok, I can make sure the paramedics going with you know that.”

Yes!!!! Thank you, Doc! I thought. Yes, I am spoiled. I don’t like anyone but Doc taking care of me when I need it. I know sometimes that is not possible, but when it is, I want him to be my doctor.

“I’m going to go and try to get it set up. It won’t be until sometime this afternoon, if I can arrange it. Likely not until at least after 2.”

“That’s fine”, I said, but was thinking just get me out of here! Dr Hunt left the room and I turned to Julian and said “Oh, Doc, just think - we could be back in Williams Lake by supper time!”

“I want to be excited, hon, but it is not going to be an easy trip.”

“Yeah, I know. I hate flying.”

“It’s not just that. You are less than 48 hours out of surgery, a surgery during which you went into v-fib and had to be shocked multiple times.”

“Do you have to be a wet blanket, honey? I’m willing to bear the discomfort to have you with me tonight.”

“I just hope it’s not too much, hon.”

“It will be worth it. And I will be able to have visitors now that Jane is caught and locked up. I can’t wait to see Karen. And I‘m sure you will be happy to see your friends.”

“Your health is more important than seeing them, Meredith.”

“Doc, you worry too much.”

“I’ve said this before, but you don’t worry enough.” I sighed. “Maybe you aren’t as bad as I thought you were. You are sighing again.”

“Haha, Doc.”

“You do know I could put a stop to this if I wanted to, right?”

“What do you mean?”

“I could call the med flight and say you can’t fly.”

“Why would you do that, Doc?”

“I won’t. But there’s a catch.”

“Aw, geez.”

“First, you do as I say on the trip.”

“It’s not like I can up and walk away mid-flight, honey.”

“No, but if I say you need a medication, you take it. I *am* going to give you a sedative, the same one you had on the flight coming here. You will give me no attitude about that or anything else I may want to give you or do to you medically.”

“Okay, Doc.”

“There’s more, Meredith.”

“Oh, come on, Doc.”

“You don’t get a say in this, Meredith.”

“You’re so sexy when you take control like that, Doc.”

“This isn’t about sex”, he said sternly, then laughed. “Only you, Meredith. Only you would think about sex at a time like this.”

“That’s not a bad thing, honey.”

He shook his head, then said “The other condition is you talk to Alex Carmichael when we get back. Not today but some time in the next few days, depending on his schedule.”

“As a friend or professionally?”

“Professionally. It doesn’t have to be official with a chart and everything. I’ll get him to see you as a professional courtesy.”

“You think I’m a nut job.”

“No, Meredith, I don’t. But you’ve been through a lot recently and if you count your illnesses and injuries since a year ago, it’s even more.”

“Doc, I talked to him before we left Williams Lake.”

“I know, but talk to him again. Anyone would have trouble with what’s happened to us in the past couple days.”

“So, you’ll be talking to him, too?”

“This isn’t about me, Meredith.”

“But you have been through hell, too.”

“I didn’t get hit by a car, almost choked to death, have major surgery and have to be shocked a few times on the table.”

“You did get shot, though.”

“All right, Meredith, I will talk to him. Now, will you agree to those two conditions?”

“Yes, Julian.”

“Wait, there’s a third.” I rolled my eyes. “You do not sign yourself out and go home when we get there. And I saw that.”

“Okay!”

“Good. You know it’s all for your own good, right?”

“I know, Doc.”

“Give me a kiss, hon.” He leaned over the bed. I kissed him and then looked him in the eye.

“I can’t wait to get back to life on the farm with you, Julian.”

“Me, too, Meredith.”

“It’s hard to believe this nightmare is over.”

“Almost over.”

“What do you mean?”

“You still have to recover.”

“That’s nothing compared to the stress of the last few months, Doc.”

“And there will be a preliminary hearing, then a trial. We’ll have to testify at both.”

“I look forward to telling the court exactly what that sow did to us.”

“Ok, hon but now you need to rest. Close your eyes and try to sleep.” He started to stroke my hair and as usual, I found myself drifting off.

I slept for a while, then was awoken when I heard someone lower one of my bed rails. I opened my eyes and saw a stretcher being pushed up against the bed. “We’re on our way, hon”, Doc said to me when he saw that I was awake.

“What?” I asked, still in what I call “wake up fog”.

“We’re going home, sweetie. The ambulance is here to take us to the airport.”

“Oh, thank God”, I said.

Once they had me on the portable cardiac monitor from the ambulance and had my IV bags - I was down to two - on the pole on the stretcher, we were on our way. It hurt to be moving, but I didn’t care. We were on our way home!

A few hours later, I was being wheeled to my room at the Williams Lake hospital. Like the other hospital, they put me on a general surgical ward. Doc wasn’t as well known on this one as he is on the gynecological ward, but he did know the surgeon that was assigned to me, Ivan Quinn, and was able to convince him to let him (Doc) help in my care. That was a relief.

It was early evening, and neither of us had had supper, so a nurse brought us some toast and decaf coffee. Normally, Doc would not eat from the floor kitchenette, but he was too tired to go down to the café.

I was still feeling the sedative he’d given me before we got on the plane. I didn’t want to go to sleep yet, I wanted to stay awake and enjoy being with Doc. I was just too drowsy, though. I was fading fast, when Doc got on the bed beside me. He put his arm around me and kissed my neck. I drifted off to sleep feeling secure and positive that our nightmare was coming to an end. I should have known better.