Anal Fingering and Spanking

I would check with the spankee first to set the ground rules. Sometimes they would tell me what they wanted and other times I would tell them what I was going to do, which included fingering as well as spanking, and if my finger came out with brown streaks on it then I would tell them they were going to get an enema as well.

Even though the top {Dom} thinks he is in control, it's actually the bottom {Sub} .

Ok... so is medicine, going to the gym, wrestling, or anything else that involves the partially exposed human body.

If spanking was another form of sex, you wouldn’t have people like me (and I’m not alone) who would be put off or disgusted by sexual play entering in to a spanking scene. I would be equally put off by a trainer at the gym putting their finger in me.

You seem to think your opinions are factual and universal. They are not. For YOU spanking is a form of sex...for others spanking might be something different.

Why don't you ask a pastor or a nun or a conservative politician what they think of spanking play. (not spanking for punishment, but for pleasure and play). I am certain there would be wide agreement on considering it a form of sex. Of course they usually have pretty dirty imaginations to begin with, that I concede.

But how about a neighbor or co-worker? Nobody thinks anything of mentioning going to a gym or wrestling club. But to a spanking event? Hmmmm ... I just don't think that is all that common. Why? Because others would instinctively consider it some form of intimate/sexual or lascivious behaviour/play.

It's perhaps a bit similar to wearing an anal plug. Is it a form of (solo) sex? Many will argue it is not, but then try the litmus test and see if you would tell a neighbor or co-worker what you've up your behind. Then discretion will be the better part of valor ... ha ha.

As for being put off by other elements introduced into a spanking scenario, that is OK. Nothing wrong with that at all. To each their own fantasy and scenario.

Skimmed over these and did have a question come up relating to the touching and sexual pleasure vs other enjoyment.

Massage.

Yeah, I know there are plenty of massages that go sexual, but there are also a huge number of massage practitioners who keep it professional, but that doesn't mean that their clients don't enjoy being touched. Sure, the areas of the body being touched are different from spanking play, but it throws in a different side.

I can see spanking (for the bottom) also being about the endorphins or "proving yourself tough enough" or a sort of penitential "paying for your sins," and all of these cases would be more hazy.

For the spanker sexual motives are very likely, but again it might just be a "hook" into the bully mindset, or power play, or even for switches maybe creating a scene for your bottom that you would like.

Anyone with more experience want to chime in?

No, jimmyjohnson, no one ever reaches between my legs, touches my genitals, parts my buttocks, runs their fingers around or does anything like that, nor do I during spankings. Unless it’s explicitly agreed upon that it’s sexual...in which case it would be confined to my wife or girlfriends of the past.

It’s done for discipline in my case, and I’ve had plenty of experience on both sides, with both genders, with no sex implied or involved, and very much off limits. I’ve been in small groups of friends where spankings happened and no one thought anything of one guy spanking another’s girlfriend, etc. Obviously, sex would’ve been off limits. We weren’t swingers. My typical spanking as of now involves no arousal at all, it’s painful and embarrassing but afterwards it’s like a reset button for my attitude. I have, in turn, done the same for others.

And what anyone else thinks doesn’t particularly matter. I’m sure adult spanking has quite an unwritten history, it’s not something people would talk about even if it happened inside of marriage. The same people who would raise eyebrows at an adult spanking scene would raise their eyebrows in any instance of it, regardless of the relationship involved.

We are here, though, on a forum where people are discussing it under some comfort of anonymity, so let’s not do as everyone else and generalize everything corporeal as “sex”.

The question about whether or not anal fingering should be part of a spanking was posed to the group, and I answered how I felt about it. I wasn’t asking for a mocking psychological analysis of it.

Good combination

I'd love to have my anus fingered while being spanked!

It's perfect combo for sure 😃. I've had it done and loved it very much.

Hmm - should have thought about this before, but never explored a (willing) spankee's rectum. For those that clearly approved, I have interrogated the warm, wet cleft nearby. Again, only with prior consent but fingering there has often been very pleasant for both participants.

Being fingered or plugged anally as part of a "punishment" spanking is vary nice

I think it is a really good way to ends up a punishment!

Ouch! Not a fan of the spanking though I understand how a jiggling tush can attract attention. I don't quite get the mix of pain with possible pleasure or more discomfort depending on how the fingering is conducted. Perhaps the person giving the punishment requires a spanking given such naughty thoughts?

It would be interesting to learn more about how one develops a fascination to mix punishment with arousal. At what age does one become sensitive to this? How did one becomes aware or learn about it? Is it different for men vs. women on the receiving end? How does one embrace becoming the one to administer pain vs. receive? Very intriguing to now ponder. I remember walking around San Francisco on vacation and saw signs all over for those seeking to experience pain.

@julie13 For me it's all about the intimacy of doing something very naughty to someone else's backside. Regardless of whether its a spanking or penetrating her most private hole. Regardless of who is in charge and who is submissive. So many lines are crossed once her dress is lifted and panties come down and her bottom is bared. Just knowing that she desires it and trusts me to do this to her is such mixture of excitement and eroticism. I feel the same when its my bottom being bared, when I'm the one lying face down, knowing she is about to spank me or spread my cheeks, either way I am so filled with dread and embarassment and also thrill and joy.

I also know that every person is different and unpredictable, like I've had a variety of experiences with the different women I've been intimate with. For example one woman I dated for about a year was very playful and uninhibited in bed, but once when I swatted her bare bottom with my hand, she got immediately very angry with me and said Don't ever hit me again! I was very surprised. On the other hand some years later I started dating a colleague who I knew from work as a group supervisor, a no BS, intimidating, loud, confident woman. I was surprised to see another side of her in the bedroom where she became very quiet and completely let me take the lead. I guess I just didn't expect this from her. So after a few drinks one night I got the nerve to tell her, Go wait for me in the bedroom, it's time for your punishment. I thought she might tell me to go to hell but without saying anything she stood up and went to the bedroom. Now very excited I went and got my long wooden ruler and put in on the bed and told her to unbutton her pants and lie facedown. Again she did exactly as I said. I pulled her pants and panties down to her thighs, enjoying the sight of her round white cheeks, and told her she would "get 10 and I want you to count them". And she did very quietly count each one as I slowly spanked that lovely bottom. She didn't move afterwards so I got some lotion and gently rubbed it all over her cheeks and "tested the waters" along her crack, which she seemed to like, resting her head sideways, eyes, closed, breathing more deeply as my fingers explored just a little between her bottom. But I was hesitant, not really sure about exposing or touching her anus at that point. But allthough it didn't happen that particular evening it wasn't long after that our sexual play did lead to me fingering her anus on many occasions.

@julie13

It would be interesting to learn more about how one develops a fascination to mix punishment with arousal. At what age does one become sensitive to this? How did one becomes aware or learn about it? Is it different for men vs. women on the receiving end? How does one embrace becoming the one to administer pain vs. receive? Very intriguing to now ponder. I remember walking around San Francisco on vacation and saw signs all over for those seeking to experience pain.

@julie13 – I think there are a few things going on here. Firstly, the areas of the brain that do sex and aggression are next door to each other, so cross-wiring can develop over time. Many on Zity were spanked as kids in punishment but since see it as a sexual pleasure now.

Secondly, when a spankee bends over for the spanker it is total submission. The spankee agrees to revert to a child-like status and surrender their body; this gives physical control to the spanker. Any yelps of pain or red marks just add to this demonstration of dominance; these cannot be faked. The practice of the spankee counting after each spank as @RichardAsni details (perhaps even saying ‘thankyou’) was hated in school but loved in the bedroom, as it reconfirms that dominance after each strike.

So returning to the OP, if amidst all this a lady lets me finger her anus, or better still enter it that way without protest, she is acquiescing to me and saying ‘do as you please’. For a man at least, these are potent sexual signals. Stories elsewhere of submitting to enemas are likewise a reversion to childlike submission in my opinion. When someone hands over control of their anus or bowels, they relinquish all control.

@RichardAsni – an early sexual partner of mine, a dominant experienced older woman somewhat as you describe, one night suddenly said ‘I want you to put me over your knee and spank me’. An inexperienced young man, I was slightly shocked but not stupid enough to question the request. Her bottom was sizeable (how I like them) and it made a hell of a noise. You have to aim for one buttock at a time, not both I found, to get maximum effect. She had been reading the ‘A Man with a Maid’ Victorian erotica novels now widely available online, which had sewn the seeds thankfully. Years later, with the relationship in a declining phase, I reintroduced this spanking play one night and she almost jumped out of her skin in protest. Nothing lasts forever.

My Daddy Dom recently spanked me with a belt and after he put his finger in my butt. I told him “wrong hole”. He said “ Excuse me but it belongs to me”. It’s very dominating to get your butt fingered and to be spanked. It’s dominance and you feel very submissive and have not control.

Yeah it is nice to break it up with some anal attention sort of brings you back when try cope with the spanking pain the change in sensation re focus the mind sort of thing and proves my vulnerable state.

I would be humiliated to not only have my panties around my ankles and a red bottom. But to have a Dom spread my bottom and insert his finger I definitely would be whimpering and moaning not sure if that would add to my punishment or not

Beth

Whenever I get spanked by my partner, anal fingering is always added as an extra punishment for me.

Whenever I get spanked by my partner, anal fingering is always added as an extra punishment for me.

As punishment? How about as a reward for taking your spanking so well? ... ha ha

I have checked and made sure my girlfriend is wet during a spanking and have spread her open exposing her anus, but I have not fingered her. I'll have to try that while I have her spread open.

I don't know as a punishment cuz I've had too many subs ask for it.

I have definitely experienced it before, after, during a spanking. I wouldn’t really say it’s much of a punishment because I enjoy it. But I’ll pretend to hate it 😉

Echoing what others had said, it seems to reinforce the dominance of the spanker and add to the exposure / humiliation effects. I’ve also been checked for wetness during a spanking and that’s always a fun little jolt of embarrassment as well.

The fingers should always be part of the spank, it makes the punishment more humiliating and makes it clear who has the power.

Some years ago I got involved with a woman who wanted to be spanked, so we met up and she ended up over my knee getting a sore bottom, I parted her bum cheeks and checked out her pussy, it was soaking, so I fingered it, she said you need vaseline as I neared her bum hole, I don't have any I said, it's over there she said.... So she got her bum well fingered, I was the dom spanking, but she was telling me what she wanted..... So who was in charge?

Some years ago I got involved with a woman who wanted to be spanked, so we met up and she ended up over my knee getting a sore bottom, I parted her bum cheeks and checked out her pussy, it was soaking, so I fingered it, she said you need vaseline as I neared her bum hole, I don't have any I said, it's over there she said.... So she got her bum well fingered, I was the dom spanking, but she was telling me what she wanted..... So who was in charge?

@JustWilliam, I guess it would depend on how long after meeting each other that session was, because if you guys had just met and barely had time to go over different sorts of details, it's totally normal – and expected – that she would tell you some of the things she wanted. You can't assume that just because you're playing a dominant role to someone you just met, you can pretty much decide everything that's going to happen without your submissive to give you some cues or directions.

Some years ago I got involved with a woman who wanted to be spanked, so we met up and she ended up over my knee getting a sore bottom, I parted her bum cheeks and checked out her pussy, it was soaking, so I fingered it, she said you need vaseline as I neared her bum hole, I don't have any I said, it's over there she said.... So she got her bum well fingered, I was the dom spanking, but she was telling me what she wanted..... So who was in charge?

Topping from the bottom? So what, if you both enjoyed it. 😀

We had chatted on line for hours over many nights before the meet, so she was well aware of my anal fixation, but it was a first real life meet, so i was a bit cautious , anyway i enjoyed the meet as im sure she did if the puddle of liquid dripping onto the carpet from her pussy was anything to go by.........Yes , a puddle !