Any recent sex surprises?

For most people in longterm relationships sex eventually becomes predictable if not boring. Has your partner recently popped up with something new (sex act, fantasy, hot words, whatever) that surprised and pleased you?

This question is too good to have no responses.

Two very noteable sexual surprises recently have actually been medfet related. In early December last year my wife Amethyst bought a metal speculum and showed it to me, moving slowly toward the bedroom without saying a single word. I later found that she had been planning this for a couple of weeks, and some of our friends on Zity knew about what she had been planning. The end result was thrilling for us both.

A similar thing happened a month ago when she showed me a digital thermometer. Obviously she wanted her temperature taking, and NOT orally. 😁

There have been surprises of other kinds, and we might share those at a later date.

At this point, any sex would be a surprise. Actually a minor miracle.

We always have little surprises for each other, it keeps our lovemaking fresh and fun. we never completely abandon our old favorites tho. many times one of us will comment: why don't we go back and do -------- again. and we do!

Sexual surprises? I honestly can't think of one recently.

I'm going to have to make sure our bedroom door is closed when we have sex over the summer now that both girls are back from college or else we might HAVE a surprise!

Ha ha Quincy you dog! Any sex would be a surprise to me too. My love life took a turn for the worse lately.

Don't I wish. I have suggested I will tongue her until she screams, but even that doesn't seem to work.

My wife has certainly surprised me. I spent the last several years on a sex diet of few hand jobs a month and whatever sex I participated by myself in private. Less than inspired intercourse one once or twice a month (a few of those months without).

Right around the new year, things miraculously changed. Sex on average, a few times a week (with several multiple goes) - dildos, vibrating toys, anal exploration - she's even flirting with sucking cock (something she has hardly EVER done). And she having some kick-ass orgasms - something that has always been difficult for her.

The cool thing is that she's enthusiastic about it - and open to a little bit of prodding from me to try new things. So far she has enjoyed them all. Pegging is next on our list - she's become pretty comfortable with our toys and my ass.

@ImDoug said

My wife has certainly surprised me ..... Sex on average, a few times a week (with several multiple goes) - dildos, vibrating toys, anal exploration - she's even flirting with sucking cock (something she has hardly EVER done). And she having some kick-ass orgasms - something that has always been difficult for her.

Congratulations to you and your wife, Doug. Long may it continue. There's hope for all us 50+s!

Sexual surprise so where is the rainbow did samwise have a nouthera kid . o that's right I found some one that would take care of me but cant get up in the am. until she does what she calls wake and bake in my words it is smoke pot and let everything go too hell other then that she made me com

Right around the new year, things miraculously changed.

Doug, what changed her opinion of sex? Can you share with us how this 180 degree change happened in your wife? Whatever she's taking, I want to get for my wife!

Doug, what changed her opinion of sex? Can you share with us how this 180 degree change happened in your wife? Whatever she's taking, I want to get for my wife!

It wasn't as much "her opinion" of sex as much as it was "her enjoyment" or it. We're pretty sure it is menopause finally leveling out and letting her hormones find a new balance. She no longer has hot flashes all the time and her periods are getting farther and farther apart. Last time she went 6 months and thought she was through with them. She also gets wet when aroused again - something that had been missing for quite some time.

It's really just a matter of sex being more pleasurable for her now. After thinking our sex life was completely history - we are both grateful and taking advantage of our second chance by being more open about things.

It also didn't hurt that (just lucky timing) I got in the best shape of my life over last summer. My weight was down and my endurance (and testosterone) were up. It had been a few months since we had intercourse leading into the holidays. Around Christmas time she opened up to have sex and right away I sensed something was different. She usually cuts me short after going down on her and pretty much just wants me to get on and get it over with. This time though, she started getting really wet and was obviously getting a lot more pleasure from the foreplay. Seeing her turned on - turned me on and I fucked her better than I ever had - in my life! And then I fucked her some more - slow, fast, gentle, hard. We were both shocked by the time we finished to see that we had been going at it (off and on) for about 4 hours.

The amazing part is how much better sex has improved our relationship outside of the bedroom - Which in turn, fuels better sex - win/win!

I'm with quincy on that, any sex would be a surprise, no shock , at this point in my life.

It wasn't as much "her opinion" of sex as much as it was "her enjoyment" or it.

Thanks for sharing all of that Doug. I'm sure I'm not the only one that was wondering how this turnaround occurred.

Was it a case where you guys had great sex before she entered menopause, then it leveled out (or disappeared) when she started? In the case of my wife, I don't think she ever really, really enjoyed sex, and then when she entered menopause she just never seemed to be in the mood at all. She doesn't seem to get wet as much anymore, and I think that contributes to her lack of enjoyment. I've also lost a lot of weight and got in much better shape in the last year or so (so has she), so maybe with all of those changes things will get better for us.

Was it a case where you guys had great sex before she entered menopause, then it leveled out (or disappeared) when she started?

We had pretty good sex when we were young. On a scale of 1 to 10 I'd rate it a "7". It tapered off a little after our daughter was born. Then a few years later, she had a false pregnancy (a mole pregnancy I believe they called it). After that, her hormones crashed and our sex life took a dive for about a year - rate it a "2". Then it slowly improved, but never to the level it was prior, maybe up to a rating around "4/5". Anal sex/play pretty much vanished and oral was strictly one sided. It was clear that she viewed sex as more of a "duty" than anything.

I had to suppress many of my sexual desires in order to keep my sanity - and as a result my performance declined as time went on. By the time we reached our mid to late 40's, I'd say we dropped to a rating of "3" primarily because the frequency had dropped to about once a month and when we did have sex, it was usually about a fifteen minute ordeal.

The onset of menopause took it back down to a dismal 2, and I was pretty sure we were headed for a rating of 1-0 as most of the sex consisted of uninspired hand jobs that I had to request in order to receive them. That's when I developed a "use or lose it" mindset and began exploring my kinks as a solo endeavor.

Right now I'd rank us at "8". I'm optimistic about moving that to "9" as we flirt with new things. I'm pretty sure reaching "10" includes some things she would never participate in - or things that neither of us could pull off physically. I'm just grateful that we put some distance between us and "0"

Thanks for sharing all of that Doug. I'm really glad things have improved so much for you. I hope you'll eventually reach that illusive "10".