Do you ever feel guilty

😢I have been in nappies now for as far back as I can remember, but over the years I have gone through several bouts of deppression and guilt about my little self, and have on several occasions thrown away all my baby stuff whilst vowing that, that is the end, but no matter what, a few weeks, or even days later, I find my self needing to be back in nappies again, these incidents, although much more rare today, have always left me with a real feeling of guilt about my baby side, just wonder if others have gone through the same.

Yes, I have done all the same things. Thrown out my stash of diapers and cleaned up the area I hide them etc. promising that I am done! Only thing is I am always back and spend the money to replenish my supply etc. I have come to know that this is part of me. I remember being about 8 or 9 years old and sneaking diapers from people I knew that had little kids, then wet them when I could hide away from adults for a short time.

I am now older and know that I need to accept my diapers as part of me, but yet my hidden part. I have not been able to tell my wife or family or any friends.

AG.

I think that it is sad when one feels theadded pressure of not being able toconfide in the person closest to them, as I say I count my self as being very lucky that my wife was able to accept little me right from the start, I have had several bouts of counciling in the past,following on from delayed post traumatic stress disorder following my involvement in the falklands conflict, and always at some stage the guilt about my baby ABDL side has emmerged, I,m not as bad these days, although I still get periods where I feel bad about my self and my nappies, but never going as far as to throw away my stuff, now I just tend not to wear for a few days, and so I suppose that taking it all round there are probably many ABDL,s who go through the same thig as us, thanks for your replies

Dave XX

I would bet that ALL of us who wear nappies /diapers have gone through pretty much the same feelings.

Those periods of extreme guilt, self doubt, worry, etc. Which then leads to throwing out everything you have thats to do with nappies.

But the thoughts drift back to nappies and sooner or later you go and buy some more, then the whole cycle starts again.

For me it was finding the internet and chatting to other wearers that finally allowed me to accept my liking for nappies.

I still remember those words from the first wearer I ever spoke to "..give up the guilt or give up the nappies...."

I gave up the guilt and since then my liking for nappies has stabilsed. I have accepted that they are a part of me, they do no harm to me or anyone else.

I have met lots of other wearers and it does help to make it more normal - that little bit of acceptance we all seek.

I even told my last girlfriend about them, one of the most nervous experiences of my life. But thankfully she took it well, she accpeted my liking for them and even started to wear them herself. Sadly the relationship didn't last for other reasons, but I still wear nappies!

Is,nt it a strange world, when a certain type of material, sewn in a different way can actually effect your whole life, if you were to go out tomorrow and buy a roll end, of soft terry towelling, then take it to a sewing machinest, and have him or her make it into a nice warm dressing gown,then the next day, along comes the post man/woman, and you answer the door wearing it, nothing would matter, but if you were to answer the door in a thick fluffy nappy made from that same roll of material, just imagine how different thigs would be, from both your point of view, and that of the postie...! It,s a strange old world some times...!

No, my diapers are a part of me.

There were times years ago when I would feel guilty but as I've grown older it just doesn't bother me anymore. I put in a hard days work and when I come home and want to unwind I should be able to. Life's too short.

I use to did but any more. I think that it's normal before one gets to accept one self as one is.

To this day my fondness for diapers is something i do not like about myself, and its something i do not understand. i honestly wish i could do away with it completely, i dont really even know why i like them... just that part of me does enjoy them, but they are a part of my life that i do not want. I want to be a man, strong and tall and be able to take care of my family, not a man who likes to dress up in a diaper and imagine being taken care of by another, its simply not what i want for myself.

The older i get the more of a handle i get on it, I use to dream of being a diaper wearer, today i am only aroused at the site of women wearing them, but the guilt still rages at times. I have also learned my enjoyment of them is something fickle all together. If i sit and stare at a picture of a pretty girl in a diaper for long enough, the picture changes from an emotional array of desire to experience something, to a girl with a peice of cloth between her legs and I grow bored and lose enterest, a few days later the misty cloud seems to shroud the reality of it, making it something so much more than it is, again. For instance, my enterest in diapers doesnt ever last beyond my sexual release...as soon as my libido falls, im left wondering why i was ever excited

It really something thats all together in my mind... not my heart. I believe the worst dissapointment ive ever experienced was one night while in the craze of desire i went and got several diapers, a hotel room, alchohol, the works and put my diapers on and used them, its what i had been waiting to do! wanted to do! and... after only a few minutes... i was so ashamed of myself, not becuase i had done anything wrong...but becuase this isnt what i want to be... i dont want to be a diaper wearing husband...father...man. eh...

Though it did help that i have a girlfriend who I love enough to tell her anything and i told her about the diapers and she honestly loves me and it doesnt change how she feels.

I havent desired to wear them myself at all since, becuase it seems the mystic of using them has worn off since my last experience, but my attraction to females in them still lingers but it is getting weaker and weaker, i no longer hord the pictures like i did.

For me.... as i became more and more aware of what it really is, nothing left to mind, no more cloudy mystic... the desire seems to fall away, becuase in the end after you clearly see it all for it really is, there just isnt anything left to desire.

for everyone else, i wish you the best of luck, and no matter what you do, your still worthwhile people, dont ever lose your happiness or love for yourself.

I do not feel guilty about wanting to be in nappies but do feel self concious, nervous, lonley (the reason for signing up)

Yes,

I certainly do feel guilty often about this fetish. It is not as bad as it used to be however. I used to be consumed in a deep self-loathing and an irrational fear that I could never have a normal intimate relationship with a girl. Now I know that that is not true, that I cannot say that because I have never tried for one, and that I am probably not the only person my age in this part of the world who is attractive and has similar interests. The problem with diapers is that they only exist on a fantastical level. To be intimate with them on any other level than in a sexual fantasy is unappealing and weird. I like to keep it in the air as a fantastical thing.

Let me see,, I used to feel guilty about liking diapers and not understand it but the internet

has helped me to accept it as part of my sexual map. I went through the same purge

get rid of baby things cycle as many of us do but now that I'm comfortable with it

I'm actually accumulating quite a layette-- maybe even some girly baby things.

I read an article that said that we aquire these desires often through circumstances

over which we have no control-- bedwetting, diaper punishment, discipline or some

other seemingly unrelated incident and it is probably more common than currently

recognized. We are sort of made that way beyond our control.

It's part of who I am and it's not hurting anyone-- I think most of us want to be loved and accepted and that is entirely normal. I've had more relationships go

wrong because I hid the shame of my fetish not because I shared it.

If I get the chance at another relationship with a woman, I'll be sure to share

my desires, because anything else isn't fair to her or me and I would not want

that situation.

Besides, if you live long enough you'll probably wind up in diapers anyway.

Just a funny story that really happened-- A couple of years ago I was having some heart

problems and had to go into the hospital for observation-- I think the nurses

had half the men in diapers for one reason or another. One of mine was very

attentive and I asked for a laxative because I hadn't gone in days-- She came back

with a cupful of her own special mixture-- well within an hour I was pooping

like mad and could barely make it to the bathroom-- I asked her for something to

stop the over-reation I was getting and she just smiled and said-- can't have

you yo-yoing back and forth-- let me know if you need protection-- being stoic

and stupid I struggled on without a pamper..Another missed opportunity because

I wouldn't let my guard down-- I should have joined the other diapered guys.

This is getting way too long --- but be yourself-- life is short.

I do feel that way sometimes. I wonder if I'm like somekind of pervert or something, but then I quickly consider that there are far worse things to be turned on by and whose to say what's normal anyways? As long as nobodies getting hurts it's my business, right?

I agree with all the previous posts. I have gone through all the same cycles, being a DL since age 5 - that's almost 40 years now! I have accepted that this will be with me all my life, and I am not prepared to give it up, as it does no one any harm, and is a part of my uniqueness and who I am. I can function in society, hold down a good job with responsibilties, so who cares. I have even been lucky enough to share it with a girlfriend.

For me, the biggest issue comes with intimate relationships. Western society has very clear ideas about maleness, and diapers don't fit in, sadly. Europe and Asia seem more tolerant to fetish lifestyles and seem to have more relaxed gender roles than Noth America.

My girlfriend could get into being diapered without guilt because 'touchy-feely' or even babyish behavior is more linked to the female than the male. She would diaper me but had trouble with my liking it because, as she said "I think of you as a man, not a baby". I found this interesting since I am more of a DL than an AB, and never acted out a baby role with her. But her mind had been programmed like most people in our society.

This aspect of the lifestyle continues to plague me, and makes me hesitant when it comes to relationships.

Anyone else found the same thing? Has anyone talked it out with their SO and got different feedback?

Yeah i've felt quite weird sometimes. Not so much as guilt, but an affliction of pride. I can't even talk to the girls i like because i feel somewhat ashamed. I buy depends or store brand on a whim, and most of the time i'll either throw them away or not use them for a while. I'm still quizy while buying them, although i assume that people think i'm buying them for a grandparent or that i work at a nursing home.

I dont feel guilty at all, why should i? Im not hurting anyone.

I have felt guilty about it many times. Most of the time i buy them then i throw them out. Its a pain in the ass feeling that way.

Not for a second, weather i'm buyin them or takein them freely :😃 or if i'm out in public pimpin them out or just at home loungin 😎 but like ashly said i'm not really hurtin anyone... well except if my diaper leeks and someone slips on my puddle but like when will that ever happen :-\

Hell yes.

But I don't blame myself.

My mother never paid much attention to me as a baby, and I used to sit in dripping-wet soggy nappies because she was too lazy to change me. Even now, she has no idea what I do.

I feel guilty because I won't have a family, or a regular life. I'll have regrets the entire time. I wish I could wind back the clock and do something different that would let me become aroused by women, and not a form of underwear.

The reality is though that I may be stuck like this.

I've tried to quit browsing such places, but I always return.

I watched "The Nutty Professor" and after hearing the "Yes I Can!", I wanted to quit this.

Just over a month later, I was back.

Sucks.

[quote author=doggalogga link=topic=73.msg9307#msg9307 date=1204891832]

Hell yes.

But I don't blame myself.

My mother never paid much attention to me as a baby, and I used to sit in dripping-wet soggy nappies because she was too lazy to change me. Even now, she has no idea what I do.

I feel guilty because I won't have a family, or a regular life. I'll have regrets the entire time. I wish I could wind back the clock and do something different that would let me become aroused by women, and not a form of underwear.

The reality is though that I may be stuck like this.

I've tried to quit browsing such places, but I always return.

I watched "The Nutty Professor" and after hearing the "Yes I Can!", I wanted to quit this.

Just over a month later, I was back.

Sucks.

[/quote]

Hey man,

well you can't just quit anything cold turkey, you have take steps toward the goal that you want to have. Just becuase you have a thing for diapers doesn't mean you can never have a family, maybe one day you'll learn to balance them, just becuause you like diapers doesn't mean it will always completely run your life, there being an occasional fling with them wont ruin your life or a relationship. If diapers is all you do...its probly becuase your isolated and have little else to do with your time. If you were in a relationshin or were a part of a family, your love for diapers would probly be there but it would really be watered down because you aren't alone and thus you just arent tempted to go beat off in diapers all the time and you have an active sex life with your partner which also really helps to rearrange your sexuality and pull things back toward normality.

Don't just assume you'll never be able to have a family becuase thats not true, it doesn't take any great feat of mental fortitude to sort of balance this stuff out, you just have to get other stuff in your life and once your mate starts to satisfy you sexually things will get better for you also.

I am not sure that I have ever felt guilty about my love for diapers, but I have wondered if I was weird. I always wondered if there was anyone else that feels the same way that I do. I believe that there is a sexual connection with my desire to wear diapers. I do enjoy having a warm, wet diaper around my privates. With this forum I have also found that others also enjoy being completely shaved as I am. That makes me feel more like a baby and also keeps the odor down and clean up a lot easier. I do have a need for protection, and find that wearing diapers makes me like me better. Catheters and leg bags do not give me the satisfaction and security that wearing diaper does. This forum is great for all of us to feel better about ourselves and our desires and needs. It is great to realize that we are not the only ones that have the feelings that we have. Along with the desire to wear diapers I also enjoy some of the baby things like pacifiers, baby bottles, onezies and footed blanket sleepers. It seems that it all goes together for me. Some have said that it doesn't hurt anyone so why should we care if others can't understand our desire to wear a different kind of underwear than other people wear. I am a DL/AB and am proud of it. I am an out of the closet gay man, and proud of that also. At my age I just want to be ME and the heck with everything and everyone else. SO: Maybe I am weird after all. lol

Yes but with some assistance from my therapist and some personal reading, I have grown to the point that I am no longer guilty or concerned with what most people think. I am very careful at work but will wear them under my uniform, I am in the military. I am diapered almost 24/7 and have no intention of quiting, I am finally comfortable with myself, for maybe the first time in my life, I am OK with me.

I put on my first diaper when I was only 5. I did this from time to time until I joined the Army. For 3 years I did not wear a diaper. When I was discharged I when right back to wearing diapers. Now, up to this point in my life I never had a guilty feeling about diapers. But then I started feeling the guilt and did just like every one else and purged and re-supplied many times.The guilt feels stopped after I found that others enjoyed diapers and after a marriage councilor told me it was OK to use a "prop" to enhance the joy of sex, many others do ,given it may not be a diaper that does it for them, but "props" and sex go hand in hand.(ie. pantie hose fetish or BD/SM or lather and latex) So it took some time but I am completely good with the whole diaper thing even to the point of telling others that I am AB/DL and I have even proved it to some of them by wearing nothing but a diaper in front of them , and wet it too.

Yes. I try not to dispose of anything because I'll want to be wet again in a few days. But I still feel guilty again.

I know I feel guilty about wearing my bath towel diapers,but mainly because theyoffend my gf who does not understand the fetish

How I wish I could find someone who would help me figure out why I feel so guilty

I don't recall ever feeling guilty, because I only do what I want to do. maybe the fact that wearing diapers is not a sexual thing for me makes it very easy but in the end I choose to wear and use them, why should I feel guilty? everybody does things that seem strange to others, it really comes down to becoming aware of and comfortable with over time, (like becoming numb to it) so to speak then its no different than anything else. at lest thats how it is for me. its just my form of underwear (that just so happens to be my toilet) girls wear 'panties' and guys wear 'underwear' but other than different cuts in the fabric for the male/female body they are the same thing. just pieces of fabric sewn together. once people see it enough its just 'normal' normality comes by the way of repeated exposure simple as that. nothing to feel guilty about regarding diapers except the unneeded negative impact we are having on our environment. (excluding you cloth wearers of course)

OK i'm incontinent, I have to wear nappies at night and occasionally during the day! But I decided a long time ago that if I have to wear them then I might as well enjoy them at the same time!

So every now and then I go out and order pink frilly legged plastic panties and other babyish or girly colors and use them for masturbation sesions. But then I land up in hospital for more surgery or rest and I worry about my family finding my Girly baby ones, so every now n then I have a big cleanout. Then I feel safe from having that side of my problem discovered, but I always end up back into them later. Kinda like trying to quit cigarettes :😃

I felt guilty and sick when my sister in law found out because i thought she was going to tell eveybody but now i dont care

Hmm I'm not sure if it's guilt or what but I met this girl at college and she was gonna stay mine one night. I live with my mum so I have to keep my diapers hidden I put them in a big rucksack in the top of my wardrobe. Nobody ever goes in there but now I'm panicking that this girl is gonna go nosing! lol. So I throw them out so she doesn't find them 😢. This was like last week and I haven't got any money for any more yet 😢

I have done this a few times before. Yeah it is kinda like trying to quit smoking, like at the time you want to but then you realise you enjoy it too much! *thinks maybe I should try to quit smoking*

xx

Sometimes I wet and mess myself. Only after I masturbate like that do I feel guilty.