This morning I woke up, showered, shaved everything and got dressed to go to the doctor. I wore blue oxford shorts and a white v-neck t-shirt with ballet plats. Underneath I was wearing a size 36 DD nude lace bra, and matching panties. I was nervous excited driving to the women's health clinic. I took the elevator to the 4th floor and when the doors opened there was a large sign announcing it was the women's health care clinic.
I walked over to the front desk, signed in with the receptionist and then took a seat in the large waiting area. There were pictures of all the doctors in the practice on the wall, as well as artistic pictures of pregnant bellies and babies. As I sat waiting for the nurse to call me back, I was regretting wearing shorts because it was very chilly in the office. I nervously thumbed through old copies of Elle magazine and Cosmo. After 15 minutes, a young nurse in navy blue scrubs called my name and I followed her to the back. We stopped at the scale (ugh), then she took me back to the exam room.
When I walked in I was a little disappointed at how small it was (probably 15 feet by 20 feet). The exam table was on the same wall as the door, angled into the exam room towards the sink area. There were pictures of the female anatomy and a diagram of a baby's development in the womb on the wall. The most exciting thing about the exam room was the large mirror on the wall opposite the exam table so I could watch the whole time. The pap smear supplies were set out on the counter, but no speculum and the stirrups were not pulled out yet.
The nurse took my medical history and asked if I had any concerns. I informed her that I wanted to get more information about an IUD and that I have also been having some discomfort in my bottom. She finished taking notes and pulled out a light blue vest and a white sheat.
"Zoie, you'll need to remove your clothing and put on this stylish outfit for the doctor. wear the vest so the opening is in the front and then lay the sheet across your lap. The doctor will be with you shortly."
At this point I really thought about peaking in all the drawers and taking pictures, but my room was right across from the nurses station, and I could hear everything that was going on outside my door, so I'm sure they would be able to hear me rummaging around, and my phone has a very loud clicking/flash noise when I take pictures 😢
So I slowly removed my clothing, starting with my t-shirt. I pulled it over my head and laid it neatly on the chair, then I unbuttoned my shorts and slid them down my tanned legs and put that on top of my shorts. I reached back and unhooked my bra letting my large breasts jiggle free, and finally pulling off my panties. I checked my body out in the mirror then put the short, thin fabric vest on. It barely covered my breasts and I had to hold it together until the doctor came in. I climbed onto the cold exam table and laid the sheet across my lap. The sheet was very sheer, and I didn't see much point in actually using it, but I didn't want to make the doctor uncomfortable. As I sat, waiting for the doctor I noticed a little sign on the counter by the sink that said "Please feel free to ask to have a nurse present during your exam"
This got me really excited, and I could feel myself getting wet, because it implied that it would be just me and the doctor in the exam room, which is how I prefer to be examined.
Finally after nearly 20 minutes of waiting, there were a short knock on the door and a tall man wearing light blue scrubs entered the exam room. He had salt and pepper hair cut short, kind looking blue eyes and he seemed fit. He was much better looking than I imagined he would be.
"I'm Dr. Brown, you must be Zoie, its a pleasure to meet you"---he reached out with his large hand to shake my tiny one.
We talked for about 15 minutes about birth control options, really focusing on the IUD option. "We would insert the IUD while you're on your period. We do this for several reasons, first we want to be positive you're not pregnant, and secondly, your cervix is slightly more open during your period than it is at any other point in your cycle. While I do your pelvic exam today I'll be checking the mobility of your cervix and I'll be paying special attention to the size of your cervical opening. Because you haven't had children yet, my guess is that it will be pretty small. Now we can still do the IUD, but I would prescribe a medication you would insert into your vagina prior to the procedure to open your cervix a little bit.....your chart says that you have been having some discomfort in your rectal area, I would like to check that out while you're here today. So why don't we get started!"
He put his stethoscope in his ears and reached into my gown to listen to my heart. He had me take deep breaths as he moved it around my chest, then to my back. When he was finished he told me I had a slight murmur, but didn't think it was anything to be concerned about for the time being. He felt the glands in my neck and along my collar bone.
"Zoie, I'm going to have you drop the vest to your waist so I can begin the breast examination. I'll start by assessing the symmetry of your breasts"
I did as he asked and removed the vest. "Good, now let your hands at your side" He stepped back and I could tell he was closely observing. "Go ahead and raise your hands over your head for me.......good. Now I would like for you to put your hands on your hips and press your shoulders inwards.....perfect. and one last thing......."---he walked closer---"lean forward so I can see the breast hanging freely.........alright. Lie back on the table for me Zoie, both hands behind your head, I'm going to palpate your breasts"
He starts on the right side feeling under my armpit and working around, pressing deeply. " Do you do monthly self-exams?"------I told him I did not.-----"Because your breasts are so large, I would suggest doing them every month so you can be aware of changes in your body"-----"He got closer to my areola, and pinched my nipple----"just checking for discharge. Everything seems good on this side, Lets move to the left"----he repeated the same exam on the other side. Then (and this is the first time a doctor has ever done this time me), he reached on the outside of each breast and pushed them towards the middle, held them for a second then let them fall apart again. He seemed to be watching them jiggle. "Zoie, you have very healthy breasts"---he replaced the vest to cover me before going onto the abdominal exam.
after the abdominal exam, he reached down to pull out the stirrups (FINALLY!). "Go ahead an scoot on down to the edge of the table, and place your feet in the stirrups for me....."---I put my right foot first then my left----" scott down just a little bit more for me. Wonderful. Now for everyone's least favorite part of the exam" (I wanted to tell him that it was actually my favorite part!"
Unfortunately, the table remained in the reclined position so I couldn't get a really good view of the exam in the mirror, but I could still see. I hear him snap on a pair of gloves. He reached for the gooseneck lamp, turned it on and immediately I could feel the bright light shining onto my most private parts. I felt so exposed and I loved every second of it. I could hear the clanking of metal---"A little pressure now, take some deep breaths"---It was a larger speculum than I was accustomed to having in me and when he opened it I felt really full and it was slightly painful.---"Doctor, its uncomfortable"----"I know, no one likes this part, just relax as best you can. The opening of your cervix is very tightly closed, if we decide to insert an IUD we'll definitely have to give you medication to open that a little before the procedure."
I saw him reach for the pap smear brush in the mirror and I saw it disappear between my legs, then I felt slight cramping as he scrapped my cervix for cell samples. Next thing I knew, i felt my vagina closing and metal being pulled from my private parts. I saw the doctor set the speculum on the counter, then turn back to me. He did the visual exam, separating my lips and being very thorough "Zoie, I think you have an external yeast infection. Have you been experiencing any itching lately?"----I told him I had, but thought it was because of my bikini wax----"I'm going to prescribe you a pill and a cream to treat this. Now for the internal, you're going to feel some pressure now"-------He applied KY to his fingers
I felt 2 of his large long fingers slip into my very wet vagina, I tensed almost immediately, not used to being that full. "I'm feeling the size, shape, position and mobility of your cervix and uterus now.....and your left ovary.....now your right.....everything feels normal"---He slide his fingers out of my vagina, removed the gloves and put on a new pair.
"I'm going to examine your rectum externally and then do a quick rectal exam. He sat down on the tool, and separate my cheeks with his hands. It lasted a few seconds, then he applied more KY to his finger and told me to bear down. he rotated and felt the walls for a few seconds then withdrew his finger, and took off the gloves.
"All done, I'm going to write a prescription for the yeast medication, and grab you some literature about the IUD and Gardasil. when you leave make an appointment for next week and we can get the IUD inserted. It was very nice meeting you"---with that he smiled and walked out of the room so I could change.