My need for discipline was not associated with BDSM. I had issues going back years and craved attonement for past deeds, a cure for current habits, and relief from personality shortcomings.
My first experience with a "professional" disciplinarian was a disaster. She was unkempt, her house smelled of cats, and the session addressed more her desire to inflict pain than to deal with my issues.
The second experience was from a true professional, and I paid dearly... from the wallet! Although she did make a good attempt to set and attain certain goals, hers was a very active and busy schedule, leaving me wanting for a more personal and understanding touch.
Then I met Mistress M. She took a personal interest, spending almost our entire first session just talking, gathering information and discussing possible treatments. A couple of weeks later we met again and I began traveling a straight-and-narrow road to recovery from the many issues that plagued me.
Although expense was not a consideration in my case, Mistress' gain from the experience was not truly monetary; rather, it allowed her to pamper herself by my providing a comfortable venue for our encounter. She would spend the night before luxuriating in the spa, which I paid for, and the next day I would join her for about an hour or hour-and-a-half of disciplinary therapy prior to her late checkout.
There were no 'safe words.' Mistress' intuition monitored my limitations, endurance and progress. I experienced pain at a level I had never thought possible, but the results of her skillful use of equipment and technique brought eventual relief, freedom and a true sense of joy in becoming a stronger and better person.
If you are only looking for a good a spanking, there are endless opportunities. But if you desire to get to the root of WHY you want one, then give it sufficient thought and find the right partner. It will be far more rewarding and you will reach a level of inner peace that many only dream of.