Honesty/openness around kinks in countries?

Hi guys and gals 😃

I was wondering - how openly, freely and honestly can you talk around your kinky desires in your country? - can you for example meet a complete stranger and sit down, talk about sex and desires, without getting stamped for being a sex-freak?

I my country (denmark, scandinavia) and in my age (20-25) i find it VERY VERY hard to find someone who might be into all these kinky plays with enemas, buttplay, veggies and all this stuff..... the last few years, i have been very open about my desires around the internet in my online profiles and when meeting strangers for a date or when having a girlfriend...

And i havent been able to find ANYONE who might be into this, from the beginning.. it all takes time, a relationship and me slowly introducing the subjects for my partner.... I would like a partner that surprised me from the beginning, so to speak 😃

In denmark - if you do stuff that others dont, you are a weirdo and people get offended and points fingers... 😃

Why is it that people gets scared or offended when you open up? - at some point you HAVE to do this, else you cant find that you seek? or what?

Am i completely off of this topic?

How is it where you live? - are you able to find partners for your kinks easily?? 😃

Regards, Tonni, denmark 😃

I'm from New York, and my husband and I tell each other everything that comes to mind regarding our fantasies and sexual desires. Here, no one really cares what you are into or point fingers, but many people are still hung up and keep their fantasies and desires to themselves, not even telling their spouses. I do acknowledge that I am more open than most, and a whore for my husband. 😁

I could sit down with a stranger and talk about sex, but probably that is more the exception than the rule. Members of my family (teenage daughters, my parents and my brother and most likely his wife) know what my husband and I are into. People who know us well probably do think my husband and I are sex freaks.

Depending on how extraverted you are, it could be easy or difficult to find kinky partners.

I always thought Scandinavia was sexually open, but I guess not as much as I thought.

Well i am also very open and share every thought and fantasy with my partner.

But i would like to share these with a stranger also, in the hope of finding new and interesting people to play with, since the internet doesn't seem to be a success for me at the moment.

Well i am very extraverted, but i am also pretty blunt and also very forthright... and talking about kinky stuff with a stranger and my way of talking - thats freaks them out appearently... though i never meet anyone past 25 in age.. perhaps this is why... i am only 24 myself...

Well i think we are.... it just first happens when you hit +40 i guess 😄

The internet has opened up an environment to allow those that feel timid about the sexual desires to open up with others without fear of judgement...or at least not physical judgement. I've know several that feel more comfortable discussing their deepest desires online, but when a physical meeting does take place they are less likely to have those same discussions.

There was a time when I thought I was the only one who enjoyed enemas....the internet has showed my I am not alone...infact there are all kinds of sexual preferences, some of which I have never heard....this site allows a person to be as honest as they desire, and to reveal as much as they like, no one here is shocked.....

We do amongst close friends, but not publicly people are too judgmental.

I consider myself to be open minded when it comes to many matters including sex. It is my opinion that European countries are even more open sexually than many in the US. To give an example I have long held a rubber/vinyl fetish and naturally exploring it on the net could be a common course of action-, what I have noticed is many many more of the people into this seem to be from countries like UK, Germany, France even the Land down Under why do you think that is??. In fact most of the sites that feature this seem to be based in these countries, anywhere other than the US. Maybe we here in the US are just to politically correct... how boring LOL

In the south the sexual mentality is very vanilla! These folks don't think much beyond the missionary position. I hear sexual fun people exists, but I guess I am missing them. :-\

I'm sure i can tell my story to my wife,she even helped me with some enemas for health reason,BUT as I see not even the slightest enthusiasm in her eyes,no reason to tell my complete fetish only to get compassion at best.

I think that sharing my interests is a bit dangerous in open public and will take long time to create enough friendship with somebody( women I mean)to reveal my fetish.

In preInternet times in my country leading erotic magazines offered some

very scarce pictures and text about enemas, now it all faded out,so I suppose people are't interested in this theme.However other fetishes are

present and still kicking.

Kaspars from Latvia

I would say people in the US are not very open about accepting what's considered "kinky," though I suspect many of those who openly seem surprised by it, privately love the thought and perhaps engage in it themselves. It seems safer to claim to be vanilla.

I think my country (Poland) is one of most restrictive and orthodox of them all.

I dont think these days people are bothered one way or the other

I think my country (Poland) is one of most restrictive and orthodox of them all.

Poland will be restrictive not by law so much, as Catholicism.

If you think thats restrictive, think about UAE countries!

In my country, we are very conservative. I dont have very many friends and the few I have would disappear if I were to open up the subject of my fantasies. Talking to strangers about it would be outright dangerous - even if they did not get offended, they could report to the police.

No, I would not have the guts to speak about this in public.

My wife too has a conservative view around kinks and hence this subject is taboo at home too. I did try and initiate it - playing doctor - but she did not share my fantasy and considered me quite mad!

Thanks to the internet and fora like this, I can freely express myself.

I'm in the central United States, the middle of "the Bible belt." It seems a good many people here are okay with common kinks - bdsm, role play, common toys, but others such as cross dressing, animals, infantilism or anything seen as "sinful" in the Bible is taboo and not generally spoken about. You won't get arrested talking about such things, but you will get disapproving looks, fingers pointed, and shunned from many social circles. The reactions are stronger in smaller towns, less so in larger cities. When I travelled to the east and west coasts - southern California and Florida - the people seemed more open. Maybe this is due to diversity because of immigration, maybe due to anonymity in a large population.

Whatever causes the differences, this is only the 3rd forum I've ever found open to discussing the more "edgy" types of play, and I'm glad to have found it!

Unlike Gypsy2800, in the part of the US where I live, trying to discuss fetishes with anyone other than my wife often brings a negative reaction. However, a few times I have attempted to bring up various fetish subjects with individuals I thought might be receptive: usually by referencing a magazine or news article to start the conversation. Most will talk briefly about the topic then quickly change the subject. A few times I have tried to steer the discussion toward fetishes of a medical nature but only in the third person. Although the individuals seemed open-minded on other risqué subjects, their responses implied that they believe that there is something wrong with anyone who enjoys medical procedures. Fortunately, we have this site where we can openly talk about our fetishes and share with other like-minded, non-judgmental people.

Canada had a TV series called KinK which was shown on public television and which was partially funded by the Canadian government.

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/KinK

It was reality TV and very explicit with videos of the participants.

I wouldn't even consider discussing the mildest of my kinks with my best pals ,in a small place like this full of very narrow minded bigoted people , i would be ostracised !

Here in S.Florida you might try to bring up a fetish with a close friend but be aware, one report to the sheriffs office and its off to jail and a permanent sex offender label on your record. Courts rubber stamp charges brought by the sheriff without any thought that a person might just be unfairly accused. No offense needed, just mentioning something that the SBC or UMC does not approve of and your done.

Some observations re Japan (I used to be married to a Japanese woman and have had several Japanese mistresses, travel there frequently): Sex is on the surface still a bit taboo in Japan, although in some ways the society os also openly very erotic (thing erotic manga comics, which one can see everywhere). Japanese women tend to be initially very shy about sex, talk about sex is likely to lead to giggles and apologies for not being used to talk about it. But at the same time, Japanese women tend to finds such discussions exciting, maybe because it is so unexpected to them that someone is so frank and open, and also because Japanese women tends to suppress their sexualities but long to explore it more freely. I find that I very quickly can start to discuss kinky activities with a new Japanese lover and in most cases once it progresses from there the sky is the limit. Bondage, sex toys, erotic examinations, e-stim.... most likely she is going to agree to try and when doing it she will be extremely enthusiastic.

Some fetishes you *could* discuss in public, but not all. Enemas, especially as a fetish, are still a taboo and often get confused with hardcore BDSM or even scat fetish. Enemas for health are less common here than in the US. I only tell open-minded people whom I completely trust about my klismaphilia.

I would be very careful with what i told people about what i like doing,they may smile and say 'oh that sounds great fun and exciting', i bet they aint saying that behind your back.

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