Surgedoc-
Bummer! 😢 From a female perspective, let me just say a few things to you. My medfet partner is a married man and his circumstances are similar to yours. He is deeply into medfet, gyno exams, anal fun, enemas, catheters, the whole kit and kaboodle. Unfortunately, his wife is decidedly NOT. I think it's safe to say that she finds plain ol' vanilla sex pretty repulsive. I never thought I'd say this but, "so much the better for me"!
Okay, enough about me! Please understand that for many women the thought of going to the gynecologist is absolutely horrific, for many reasons. For some it may be embarrassing, for some it may be humiliating, some women may have been brought up to believe that it's nasty or something they just have to tolerate and get through once a year. In my case, going to the gynecologist (or any other medical appointment) is just another day on the calendar. I don't get a particular thrill out of it. It's only at the hands of an imaginative play doc that I get a case of the chills.
Without knowing you or your wife, I would suspect that medfet and gyno exams at the hands of her husband are simply not her "thing". Maybe she's never even considered the possibility that this kind of play might be erotic. Have you taken the time to discuss it with her in a neutral environment (not in bed)? Have you told her how much it turns you on? Have you offered to let her reciprocate and examine you?
If you've covered all those bases, and the answer is still "no", then I would leave it where it is. I know from personal experience that constantly harping about one or two things is the quickest way to turn your spouse off in so many other departments. A friend once told me, "there is no point in tyring to teach a pig to sing, it just annoys the pig", see what I mean?
Play On!
LadyDoc