Enema cheating

If you are married and have an enema fetish, and you go to a strictly legitimate colonic or enema therapist, should it be considered cheating?

I think it would be cheating if you hid it from your partner. If your partner doesnt want to be involved then they shouldnt have a problem with you going to a legitimate place of business.

I assumed from the question that one would consider going there because ones partner refused to help or didn't want to be involved. If that is the case, I wouldn't consider going there as cheating, as one isn't 'leaving' ones partner for 'greener pastures', just 'seeking some solace'. I agree with macleod that under such circumstances, one should inform their (uncooperative or 'uninvolvable') partner that one is taking this avenue.

But not all relationships are at that level of maturity or solidity. Consider the case of an interpersonal relationship at an early stage, when one hasn't yet broached the 'enema' topic, but one still wants to 'relieve' oneself by visiting a 'colon therapist'. Or the case where one believes that there is 'no way' their partner would want to be involved. Is it cheating in those cases?

I wonder...

Cos.

I think the only person's opinion who truly matters concerning cheating is the person you might be cheating on. Everybody else's opinion is superfluous except for possibly the "judge" if it goes that far......Jimbeaux

I dont go to to the colonic clinic to have sex with the therapist.

I go there for the experience both for health reasons and the turn on I get from the colonic.

A strange thing happened when i received my first colonic at age 33. having a life-long enema fetish, of course i first went for a colonic out of sexual curiouity but after getting the colonic i realized that the experience somehow trancended sexuality to me. something i do not fully understand to this day! since that first time, i have had dozens of colonics from several different therapists (all of the women, of course) and have never experienced them in a sexual way.

I it even 1/4 of the way worth risking EVERYTHING you have built for so long for what amounts to 2 or 3 enemas????

If you were married and went to a colonic clinic purely for the colonic--NO HAND JOBS, it would NOT be cheating.

If I gave you an enema in the hospital because you requested it from your doctor that wouldn't be cheating. I would agree with Susie getting a colonic from a legitimate therapist wouldn't be cheating. I think flirting or trying to hook up on a forum would be a form of cheating unless you just want to chat and have an enemate friend which ends at that. I consider that therapy for our fetish.

Most of us probably have some secrets from our significant others. "Cheating" in my definition involves overt sexuality with the objective of mental or physical gratification which, if known, would physically harm your partner. If a partner knows of your enema fetish, doing a colonic with or without their knowledge doesn't seem to be cheating, especially if there is no sexuality involved. If your partner has warned disapproval of your enema fetish and you continue with enemas or treatments, then I do think this to be cheating. If the partner allows you to pursue e-play with a "don't ask, don't tell" policy, then there aren't any boundaries crossed. In-between is a big sea of grey and probably depends on your history and dialogue on the subject.

My wife knows about my enema interests. Went to a licensed colon therapist and had two done. Told my wife about it and the only issue she made was about my wanting to do it. Nothing about cheating. However, many years ago she learned about my having had conversations with a lady at work about enemas and was highly worked up thinking I was having an affair. Finally convinced her that it wasn't the case and everything sorted itself out. She would have considered that exchanging enemas would have been the same thing as having had sex. Funny, thing is, is an enema really any different than a blow job and we all know that blow jobs are not sexual (I did not have sex with my secretary in the oval office), LOL!

If you had an "enema Friend" and no sex was involved, I don't see it as cheating, nor does my wife. Even if you take care of business yourself during the event. Taking care of business during the event is not much different than doing it while watching porn. My wife does no play, she has tried it and tried to enjoy it for me, but it is just no use. She accepts that I do it. Yes we have talked about me having an E friend and is ok with it, as long as there is no sex. She is willing to let me enjoy my enemas as long as it does not involve her. I think she is ok with an E Friend because it is so hard to make a connection, so it easy to say yes when the odds are in her favor that no one will want to play. That's my opinion and opinions are like A _ _ holes, everyone has one.

If you are married it's a real shame that a) you have to hide your love of enemas from your spouse, or b) your spouse knows and is not supportive. When I first met my wife the whole enema thing freaked her at first but in time she accepted it and even got into it to a degree. (Willing to role play, no actual water going in.) If you are really close, maybe after a few years, your spouse will allow you to see a surrogate if they can't fill your need. Honestly is so important. If you know your spouse needs something and you can't help, they should be understanding enough to be flexible.

Each relationship is different. What is important is not doing something that will hurt your partner. This may be what you sense, knowing your partner well. Or it may be something that you have talked through. But if in doubt either talk it through or don't risk it if you value the relationship. There are no general rules -- one relationship may allow all sorts of activity outside the relationship while another may tolerate almost nothing. The important thing is not to make assumptions.

Just describing this as 'cheating' indicates two possible problems. First is the harm that you may do to the relationship if your partner finds out. But the greater danger is that even though your partner doesn't find out, you will feel guilty and that guilt will harm the relationship. It may seep out, thus you will be the one informing your partner. So if you are going to 'cheat', you must be entirely comfortable doing so. And the very use of the word 'cheat' makes me wonder whether you are.

If it feels wrong you are cheating. My wife is not into enema play so I see therapists and Dommes often. I rationalize that it is not sex but know if my wife was aware she would not be happy. It is what it is!