Last fall my doctor ordered a double contrast barium enema. I went to the local hospital to schedule it and receive my prep instructions. I panicked. I was to fast for two days and drink Golytely. I heard that stuff is vile, voluminous, and violent in effect. I was not happy.
I cheated and ate a light lunch at the 36 hour mark. The instructions said drink one glass every 30 minutes and not every 10 as the box said. That helped me a LOT. I had no ill effects from the golytely. It did the prescribed job, and was not vile or violent as billed. All in all, it was much better than I feared.
The radiologist was a new doctor. He wanted to do a single contrast barium enema. That is not what I expected. It is not as sensitive a test, and does not require as extensive a prep. He did not care. So I was over-prepped and under-examined. He asked if I had ever had a barium enema. I said no. He said we will try to be as fast as possible.
They asked if I would let an x-ray tech student help. I said sure. She was in school in a nearby town and needed to do five exams to complete her clinicals. I was guinea pig number 5.
She was nice, and tried to help me relax. I got a warm blanket and all that stuff. We joked and said her job was to get me into position for the x rays, and my job was not to make a mess. She said she would be the one to clean it up.
They had the room all set up for me. An IV pole was at the foot of the table. A heavy-duty enema bag was hanging, shoulder high. Those things hold 2500 ml or 3000 ml. It was about 2/3 full of thick, heavy, white barium, so I am guessing they had prepared two quarts. The hose was clear plastic. It has a ½ inch inside diameter, all the better for a fast, deep fill.
On top of the poles crossbar was the nozzle. It was tan, about 7 or 8 inches tall. It is quite a bit larger than your thumb. It had a small hose on either side, plus the main hose at the base. The tip has a hidden donut which they will inflate once it is safely and deeply in my rectum. The small hoses are used to fill the donut with air. It swells to about 2-3 inches when it does its thing. That holds it inside me as I roll about on the table, and also prevents leaks.
That nozzle was pointed eerily skyward. The heavy hose aimed it precisely at the ceiling. It stuck up above the filled enema bag. I was amazed and intimidated by it all at the same time.
They gave me two hospital gowns and pointed toward the bathroom. I was to remove all my clothes, even my socks. It can get messy, remember. One gown was to open in front, the other in back. I was to return and lay on my back on the x ray table.
I followed instructions, and stared at the steeple-nozzle.
They took a scout film of my gut, and left me to stare at the nozzle some more until it was developed and reviewed by the doctor to see if I was ready for the test.
This time the doctor, the student nurse, and the regular technician all came to visit. The doctor said we are ready, the nurse watched, and the technician told me to turn on my left side. He opens my gown. He told me to take a deep breath and he would insert the nozzle as I exhaled. What he did not tell me was that he would do that three times before he got it deep enough to do its job. If he used any KY at all, it was not near enough.
When they started the flow, I could tell it was hang em high time, and that hose was big enough to do double duty on the local fire truck. It did not hurt, but I could feel the flow. I was quickly filled. I’m guessing I took most of the two quarts.
The student nurse turned me from side to side. She would feel for my pelvic bone to get the angle right. Then she would tell me to take a deep breath and hold it. She was behind a wall with the x ray controls. They took about a dozen shots. She kept saying she was trying to hurry so I would not be uncomfortable. The two gowns helped a lot.
Finally, she said they were done with that part. She was gone for several minutes to let the Doctor review the films. All I could do was stare at the mostly empty bag and feel the barium inside me. The nozzle felt like a sewer pipe. She finally came back and laid the big bag down and let the barium drain from my rectum back into the bag. The donut was deflated. I was allowed to head to the bathroom and end the rectal invasion.
I told her she passed her test and that I passed mine because I did not make a mess.
Then it was back on my back for two more x rays. That was the end. I was free to empty by bowels without outside help or control. I could lose my gown and put clothes back on.
In less than an hour and a half after they called me back I was sitting at McDonalds eating breakfast. Thirty minutes later I was at my desk. I would do a dozen of these before I would do a colonoscopy. I have had both. The big disadvantage of the barium enema is that you need a follow-up colonoscopy if they find something with the barium enema. If you think you are clean, go for the barium enema.