Power imbalance with real doctors

Hello my english speaking friends, I wanna know if you have a problem with the power a medical worker has over you? I mean you go to the doctors office, a unknown new person in your life speaks 3 minutes with you and then you have to show them your intimate parts. But the doctor will not. Its no sexual situation. Because only you have to strip. Maybe an assistant is also in the room with you. He she sees something of you, maybe you would not show them if you would met them normally because you dont like them. But a new doctor tells you what to do. And the helper is watching. That makes the exam even more embarrassing. They have power, you will not ask them to strip down, also. You get kicked if you ask them to show theirs. What does this power imbalance do with you? are you afraid, or do you like that real situation? or are you jealous because they are allowed to tell you what to do and you dont have that power over them or a nice woman? tell me please. Greetings from Germany to all of you.

Sad I hoped you would tell how you feel about this topic. maybe its not interesting for you.

I didn't quite understand what you are getting at. As you write, going to see a doctor is not a sexual situation. Obviously you will have to let him/her examine what ever part you are complaining about. Even if this is so intimate to you, a doctor sees no difference between your intimate parts, your hands, and feet. He is there to do his job that he is qualified to do. And hopefully get to the bottom of your problem or refer you to a specialist that will have a deeper knowledge of various ways our marvelous bodies work!

I don't see any signs of power in a consultation with the doctor but I do appreciate that some individuals would not be as at ease as others would be. Also, I think it is true to say that for some reason men are far more concerned about having an intimate examination from a doctor that women are!!

As I see it, you're paying a physician for his special knowledge in how best to care for your body and health. It's strictly voluntary. Actually the power is all in the patients hands...you can always decline the advice and walk out of the office.

My notion is that the real power a doctor has is the power/knowledge to know how to (hopefully) cure you of whatever complaint, illness or disease you came to them for.

You wish to get better? Then do as they say and leave notions of modesty or power imbalance behind if these might perhaps arise. Don't make the job of curing you more difficult for them.

Following a surgery that resulted in some nerve damage and partial paralysis, while still in ICU, the on call neurosurgeon who we had never met before examined her. He was smirky and pompous and was putting pressure on a nerve in her leg and it was very painful for her, but he kept it up for what I thought an unnecessary long time. I didn’t like him or what he was doing and I told him to stop. He did, made some comment to me and finished off charting, then left. Told the nurse I’d prefer he not examine my wife again. Far as I know, we never saw him again.

Some time later in a rehab unit, a tech walked in with a portable ultrasound machine, asked what that was for and the tech said the rehab doc wanted to check her for some rare organ disease that may have caused vascular problems that may have caused the original problems that required the surgery. Nothing to do with rehab. We refused and she was fine and polite with that, just noted patient refusal. Told the neurosurgeon what happened and that my wife wasn’t a science project for the rehab doc. He agreed and said he’d have a word with her

Like @Pollux said, you do have the power and can refuse treatment/procedures. Those were the only two times we ever felt the need to do that, generally we trust docs, but are inquisitive.

The posting form Pollux has it right on!!!

Actually the power is all in the patients hands...you can always decline the advice and walk out of the office.

Several years ago my internist scheduled me for an early morning physical exam... first patient,8 am. By 8, I was in the office, the nurse weighed me, took my vitals, etc. an told me to strip and put-on the gown. Doctor will be right in.... Comes 8:30 and no doctor. So I open the examining room door and in a loud voice "where is the doctor?" About 8-10 minutes later in comes the doctor, no excuse and simply says... "if you are so upset, perhaps we should reschedule this exam? My response, "I am not upset, let's just do the exam unless you have something better to do!" He actually completed the exam and did what I thought was a good job. Later I sent the doctor a watch as a present and informed the office I would NOT be returning.

Some years later I had an emergency room visit for what turned about to be a gallbladder attack (first time); staff diagnosed the problem with in less than one hour.... then the resident "hospitalist" ordered that I spend a day or two for observation in the hospital to see if my pain disappeared. My pain was diminished and I requested a GI specialist and this "hospitalist" said "we don't need one". So after 8 hours chained to a hospital bed I called for the floor charge nurse and asked for "release papers" to get out of the place. Went home and contacted a different doctor who arranged for removal of my all bladder about a week later.

I expect doctors to be knowledgeable and capable BUT in the end, they are really in the service business and if they cannot or won't provide me,the patient with service, I move on!

In most countries a doctor has little or no legal jurisdiction over a patient so a power struggle does not really exist.

You think disrobing is some kind of a power game between you, the doctor and the medical staff? When you are ill you go to the doctor and said doctor needs to examine the part of your body that is hurting you. If you are having a physical exam you can also expect to undress so your overall physical condition can be assessed. Granted if you are at the doctor's for an eye problem and you are ordered to undress I would certainly be alert to suspicious behavior.

First and foremost look yourself in the mirror. Perhaps the problem is you and not the doctor. If you continue to have these suspicious feelings then move on and find a new doctor. Regardless, make a decision. The road is populated by dead squirrels who didn't make a decision. Buen Camino, Pilgrim

Some years later I had an emergency room visit for what turned about to be a gallbladder attack (first time); staff diagnosed the problem with in less than one hour.... then the resident "hospitalist" ordered that I spend a day or two for observation in the hospital to see if my pain disappeared. My pain was diminished and I requested a GI specialist and this "hospitalist" said "we don't need one". So after 8 hours chained to a hospital bed I called for the floor charge nurse and asked for "release papers" to get out of the place. Went home and contacted a different doctor who arranged for removal of my all bladder about a week later.

You were chained to a hospital bed for 8 hours? You were in restraints for a potential gall bladder issue? That seems rather extreme, wouldn't you say?

My notion is that the real power a doctor has is the power/knowledge to know how to (hopefully) cure you of whatever complaint, illness or disease you came to them for.

@agracier I agree. They are suppose to be the expert on whatever ails their patients.

Fortunately I have not had the kind of "power imbalance" the OP is asking about.

...you have to show them your intimate parts.

I have experience a power imbalance, me being less informed than the surgeon, when I had my first meeting after breaking my arms. He had the information and did not share it well withe so that I could make an informed decision. Terrible bedside manner.

Thx for answers, very interesting but what I meant with power is that they will see something from you, which you cant see from them. I mean you have a urethra exam, the nurse will prepare you and your penis. you get an erection, and then this foreign person now knows how your erection looks. something you wont never tell or show her in real life situation. but with that medical power, she knows parts of you, you want to hide or dont want to show foreigners. (is foreigner the right word, sorry?). and if you turn that you ask them if thy also strip down they will say no never, thats clear. but you dont have the power to see them naked, but they command you to strip down and get exmained. hope you understand what i mean. just to be clear, i have so many illnesses, was examined many years at urologist, dermatologst, proctologist, always by 2 women, often by male+female but its in my head that they do something to me i dont want. especially when its a young nurse. that embarrassing. for many years, maybe 20 yrs ago I worked year and years in earlier days as medical technical assistant here in Germany, but on this side I didnt had a fetish or the will to see people naked. the other side as patient, that what i am interested into, but that power imbalance. but you dont see it, thats okay, its interesing, but I have my point, its a special situation for me. maybe a social phobia 😃

but you dont have the power to see them naked, but they command you to strip down and get exmained.

If you have a urethral problem and you don't wish to have anyone examine you properly, insisting on reciprocal nudity as a quid pro quo, then you will not get much medical attention and then you can go your merry way and continue suffering from whatever medical problem ails you. It's up to you.

You're not 'dating' a medical professional when you go to them for a medical problem. There is no assumption of reciprocity of nudity. You are simply coming to them to get your problem fixed.

If for instance you have a problem with your car and you take it to a garage to get it fixed, would you then insist that the mechanic let you fiddle around with their cars?

These things are not two-way streets. You're not playing a game of 'I'll show you mine, if you show me yours' with a real doctor.

dont want to show foreigners. (is foreigner the right word, sorry?

I'd use the word strangers.

The difference between my private parts at a doctor and my car is, the car does not feel ashamed when it gets examined. but me. I quickly feel embarrassed, when 2 women examine my anus, prostate or penis. when I feel save and need not to make sorrows about getting an erection, I can release better and the exam does not hurt that much. for me its very hard when a female helper is also in the room. I feel better when I am alone with doctor. that my thought, because I am new into the patients view of MedFet, so i have to struggle with that situation. but you are right, everytime I was in hospital, or had many many rectal exams, bladder tests, enemas, I was thankful that I got help and she was nice to me and calmed me down. but I can never be relaxed when too many persons are also in the room. my car does not care about viewers. thx, strangers sounds better. but i understand your point, but maybe its part of my own fetish, that I dont want the doctors to see something from me, which I wont never ever show them when we meet privately.