Shame and Embarrass Fetish and not a Medical Fetish, or what is that??

Hello there, I need an advice or opinion from you please. I worked some years in germany as medical assistant and never had an arousal or something when I had to work with patients. And thats very good because I was professionel. But I started to like the patients side, I mean its very exciting for me when I get examined by myself. But not in a typical MedFet way, I wanna explain, maybe you can help me to understand what I feel..........

I dont like it when blood gets pulled, I dont like heart beats, I am not aroused when I get an enema, its normal for me to get a penis exam or prostate check. In dermatological skin check I also got not aroused, everything is just a normal exam and I only try to rate the practice of the doctors. Its really not a fetish. But what is so exciting for me:

The power the assistant or nurse has over me. She tells me to undress. I dont want it, but I do it. They do maybe some embarrassing exams to me, and I have to do what they say. I never had feelings when I told the patients to undress. I was cool. But that patients side is so interesting for me. The doctor will not get naked, but I have to. My urologist will touch my penis but not in a sexual way. I must not get an erection. The other person sees me naked but me not them. Its such a power. But I am no exhibitionist, I wont go to the park and show me, no. And I hate medical porn. Its so boring for me when the actors start doing sexual actions, maybe the female doctor examined the penis with her breasts. Thats not mine. Its just the embarrassing when they dominate me and I have to get naked or must show my a**hole or they examine my anus. Or that completely nude skin exam, when only I am nude, not the doctor or even more embarrassing when a assistant is also in room.

Do you know what I feel? Is that a medical fetish? Or is it dominance? is it a CFNM setting? Can you help me out, to understand my thoughts about being a real patient? Like I said I never had feelings when I examined or prepared the patients some years ago. Whats your opinion.

@arzthelfer2000 You've pretty much summed up my feelings as well, I don't think you're as alone in this as you think. A lot of people, at least in zity, are into the embarrassment factor. My medfet revolves around (in order) my embarrassment, the imbalance of power/control dynamic in the environment, my exposure, and in a very distant last place, the physical manipulation and contact. During real exams, I don't usually get aroused. In fact, it's just the opposite, I shrink and shrivel. I'm trying to pay attention to and engage in the conversation with the provider, as well as simultaneously retain all information given to me. However, while doing all that I'm also trying to retain a memory and recollection of all my senses, feelings, and emotions because that's what arouses me later when I'm by myself and remembering my exam.

Another big aspect in medfet for me is thinking about and imagining other people during their physical exams. Although, I'm not exactly sure how/where that fits into my other feelings... I think I just like to imagine them having the same feelings as I do and what it might be like from their perspective.

You have written a really interesting and absolutely true statement of your own feelings during a medical exam. First, you can make yourself easy, you are an absolutely normal person, with normal reactions and thoughts. No, you are not an exhibitionist or a porn actor, when you have to show you all naked, or more embarrassing, in indecent postures. It is just because you have been told to undress and to expose all your body. It is just necessary for conducting your examination. In all cases, being ordered to undress by a nurse, a doctor , a gyneacologist or an urologist, it is the same, you are just obliged to do it, you are under controle and in a state of submission during the time of this exam, even you admit it or not. It is what I call the cerebral or emotional aspect. And it can be really impacting mentally.

In my own case, I very rarely feel aroused when I have to pass a real medical exam, I just feel embarrassed and do what I am told to. I sometimes wonder what the doctor or my gyneacologist thinks about me, about what he sees while examining me but I am not really aroused at this moment. BUT, once I get back home, it happened many times that I remember what happened in the medical office with the pratician and with a bit of imagination, I fantasy about it and at this moment, I can get aroused.

In fact, all the difference between the moment of the real exam and the moment we can think about it , is in our own minds, it is just the cerebral aspect, because we are not animals, we have a great brain and able of conscientiouness.

@arzthelfer2000 - pretty much the same here. I think you nailed it (and I don't think it really needs a label or category).

For me (and I've written about this elsewhere), it's the shifting power dynamic. In most of my life, I am usually the guy in charge, or the guy people come to for advice or guidance. When there is an emergency or a decision to be made, people look to me.

All of that changes in a medical environment. It is not my area of expertise or knowledge, so I am dependent on others. This is amplified when I am undressed - in my underwear, a gown, or naked. Especially so with CFNM.

Outside of a medical setting, the power dynamic would be different, but to be in a vulnerable position, exposed, and being directed what to do....

Sure, embarrassment has a lot to do with it, but the objectification, vulnerability, and change in power dynamic is everything.

For me, there is no appeal for any BDSM - just the reality of the CFNM in a medical setting.

@BenDover

Im new into it but its nice that you explain me that others are feeling the same. Or that just that embarrassment factor is present in other fantasies. I also shrink cause the situation is real and I have aches. But at home Im very aroused, and have anxiety that in next exam I could get a boner. But I wont.

@GlamourousCeleste

I know the difference. Like I said I never got an erection but its very arousing for me. And because it is real. Its not play. its not fake. I guess in a play I would be bored. I also dont go to "the special ladies for 50 euros..." also not interesting. But at home I think wow what did they do with me, they told me to strip, they told me to bend over, to lie on a gyn chair, they touched me, a female helper watched me while I do this. In the next proctologic or urological exam, its again so normal, its only medicine, I knew it from assisting and healing by myself others, I am professionel. But at home wow what a story I cant wait to get more. And in all my years as active person I nevr wanted to use/exploit the patients. Thats why I like being a patient. In real I loved my profession, but never "played" with patients.

@FredD

thank you Im ald you say I nailed it. I really think I am not a real medfet guy or I even dont understand whats up with me. an own category is great idea. power shift dynamic is well said, escpecially in cfnm setting and nudity is indeed vulnerable. I should read more about cfnm and what its about in medical setting (passive for me like I said).

I get the same feeling. And sexual stuff in a medical video is such a turn off for me too. I have watched some real physical exams on YouTube. They were practice physical exams done for training of the doctor.

I love the feeling of being ordered to strip in front of the nurse or doctor. I know the feeling. I would say it's medfet and CFNM.

I wanted to add a little context to my comments.

For some people, their excitement in this type of scenario is based on the providers' reaction. From my perspective, the less of a reaction, the better. The more objective and detached, the better.

Again, for me, it's about stripping away the facade of power and authority. It's about vulnerability. It's not sexual at all, in the moment.

Thank you for asking and sharing this intimate part of your self... and to me, that is key to the question you are asking.

i think part of what makes understanding difficult sometimes is when we try to fit how we are, how we feel, into a mold or already labeled container. While i do believe we all have similarities in common on many things, at the end of the day, we are all different too, individuals. i think you do a great job of seeing and articulating what you feel and what arouses you.

The first thing that stands out to me is that 'realness' is an important factor for you. i can relate to this. i do not like role play because, to me, that is a denial of something that i perceive as very real and deep. I.e., i don't want to "play" a "role" that i perceive i really, truly am. Again that's just an individual thing, not making it a universal thing. Porn also turns me off, but videos of people not acting, but having sex for themselves, not as a production, can be very arousing to me.

As to the embarrassment/shame parts? i also get deeply aroused by some very specific kinds of being embarrassed/shamed. Again, i think the type, or what causes that response in us is very individual. i believe that it's based on having desire/need that is taboo, not the norm, etc.. From an early age, we are culturally conditioned that some things are shameful. If those things happen to be desires or needs that we have, when someone taps into it, it evokes the conditioned response of shame and embarrassment.

Feelings are deeply rooted in our brain, our senses all process through the feeling part of our brain before that information goes up to the reasoning part of our brain. i believe that the feeling part of our brain governs a lot more of who and how we are than the reasoning part of our brain. I.e., the reasoning part of our brain may tell us that there is no reason for us to be embarrassed or ashamed, yet our feelings tell us the opposite. i think there is a part of you that likes being controlled in specific areas that would normally be very private or intimate, and the feelings of embarrassment and shame are conditioned responses.

That's how i have come to see it in me anyway. i get very deeply aroused by certain kinds of Men Who have/want/need to assert certain kinds control with me. So for me, it's different because of Their component of want/need to have that control and embarrass/humiliate me. It's not the same for me in a professional setting if i do not perceive want/need from them that matches mine, where you seem to want/need that "professional" buffer.

..... the reasoning part of our brain may tell us that there is no reason for us to be embarrassed or ashamed, yet our feelings tell us the opposite.

@tallslenderguy Couldn't it be just the opposite? Our feelings tell us we want the pleasure but our brain somehow feels it wrong and shameful and that's where the emabarassment/shame comes from??

Just a thought - I always enjoy the thought and detail you put in your posts!! Makes me wake up my old nogging and "think"!!

@tallslenderguy Couldn't it be just the opposite? Our feelings tell us we want the pleasure but our brain somehow feels it wrong and shameful and that's where the emabarassment/shame comes from??

Just a thought - I always enjoy the thought and detail you put in your posts!! Makes me wake up my old nogging and "think"!!

Oh yeah, i think so. i should have qualified "may tell us." And really, both our feelings and reason can be conditioned. i do believe we make more of our decisions base on emotion than on reason. i think a lot of time we will employ reason to 'justify' our feelings, but it's still emotion running the show? As usual, i wouldn't deign to be absolutist about any of this stuff, i believe there's usually exceptions and infinite angles, so i love discussion like this and reading other peoples views, perspectives.

edit: did you mean to say "but our brain thinks it wrong or shameful"? i believe both feeling and thought come from the brain, just two different areas. Science (currently) notes that sensory input goes through the "feeling" part of our brain before it reaches the "thinking" part. Some theory is that we evolved having to respond quickly to keep from getting eaten by a saber tooth tiger, so feelings react without need for thought and thus 'save us.'

@tallslenderguy and @DrPatient

thank you for your answer with a lot of effort. sure I tried to be honest with myself and tell you that I like those real exams. becasue they are real. because i cant control them. I guess in a play maybe it comes to sexual actions - a no go for me. we could talk about fetish, I dont want that. but in reality maybe you right, they control me. i dont want to be naked, but they tell me to strip. I hate it when a nurse is also in the room. but I cant change that (ok wait I could send her out of room, ok). but it could be right what you say about control which is lost for me. I worked in germany some years as medical assistant. I had control, but I didnt wanted it. its the patients side which arouses me. in a play, it alsways i only a role. real is real. thats my point i guess. i will think over it again whats up, everyime I have to be told to strip. thx.