Women unaware of variations of female genitalia

My impression is that many women are unaware of the vast amount of variation there is in the appearance of normal female genitalia. Too many women seem to think that there is one ideal form, and unfortunately there are cosmetic surgeons who are only too happy to play on these anxieties. Any thoughts on this topic?

Well, I must admit that in my life I have seen many female genitalia and I have yet to find one that I didn't think was beautiful. I did discover that many women didn't feel they were beautiful, not to mention many have not really inspected their own private parts. Theirs are hidden from sight and for a woman to see her own labia and vulva requires a bit of effort. Even when I tell them that they are beautiful, they doubt me until I convince them, with the help of a mirror, to see for themselves. While they watch I spread their labia showing them and telling them what I find amazingly beautiful. I show them their own beauty and show them where I like to touch them, then they can see where the touch is and where the sensation comes from. I think women are a wonder and I would never make love with the lights off…. I want to see their beauty, head to toe outside and inside them.

To thedocisin: Well said!

@thedocisin

Agree with everything

I have used the mirror several times

All female genitalia are distinct and beautiful

Hopefully, this is changing. Yes, I agree , a mirror is a great idea, and perhaps showing your partner some illustrations of the many normal variations there are, you can show her how sweet and unique this wonderful part of her anatomy really is. I compare it to a beautiful flower with open petals.

It’s quite true - at least for my generation. Girls don’t compare genitals like boys do. For one thing it isn’t as easy. I have a female cousin I played doctor with and I knew hers looked different than mine but not THAT different and a sample size of 2 ain’t much.

My understanding of what other women looked like was through porn and until just recently there wasn’t a whole lot of variation demonstrated there.

Women today are definitely aware of the vulva variations thanks to feminism and sex educator communities as well as women who work in medicine. And the clitoris isn’t just the hooded button we are all used to seeing, there is erectile tissue behind it and within the vulva too. But not many people are aware of that yet.

Why weren’t women aware of variations before? The answer is easy. Patriarchy, purity culture, pornography, and capitalism. Women sometimes get plastic surgery on their vulvas to make it look like “the ideal vulva”. Also, in certain cultures, female genital mutilation is a thing.

And women didn‘t talk about their bodies as much with other women back then because we were all raised to be ashamed of our bodies, body hair, weight, periods, being a slut, and enjoying sex.

I don’t know why y’all are acting surprised.

I would not be surprised if it was straight women not knowing that there are variations with vulva appearance, but remember that lesbians and bi women, and enbys with vulvas exist. We all have been aware of vulva variations for decades.

Some Zity member told me his mother had once crudely joked (about girls) that they “all look the same upside down”. I think her idea was that even though some may have cuter faces or whatever, they all have similar genitals and that's after all what a boy is after in a relationship. (Yes, this is a particularly crude way of talking to a boy about girlfriends, but, hey, my own mother used to say things like boys go in relationships only for sex and so on, and she also used to joke about adult males about their female interests.)

Now why “upside down”? This member told me his mother used to give enemas to him and his sisters, and he got his bent over the tub rim, bottom upturned. Presumably, she saw her daughter in this position and concluded all females look the same viewed from that angle. Of course, this is not good reasoning: sisters are likely to have similar features…

On a more serious note, some women are also unaware of variations of more internal female genitalia.

My sister tried using tampons as a young teenager, but was unable to because they hurt (I think she had a particularly stubborn hymen). However, at some point she ended up with a PE teacher who considered periods to be an invalid excuse for skipping swimming lessons because tampons exist. That teacher said something like “I'm a female, don't bullshit me, tampons are not difficult, you're just liars and lazy girls” and basically ordered the girls to use tampons or else.

The thing is, our mother sided with the teacher. Apparently neither our mother nor the teacher had had problems using tampons, so they really could not comprehend why a girl would want not to use them, except as a bad excuse to get out of swimming class.

(Truth to be said, our mother was in a bad mood in those days, and my sister, at that age, used to give fake excuses to get out of chores. Also the PE teacher was otherwise abusive, so it may be the case she was aware of difficulties, but did not care.)