What starts a fetish ?

Just curious to other peoples views on what starts a fetish ?

The classic answer would be some sort of exceptional (childhood) event that brings about some sort of sexual reaction or connotation, even when people are too young to know what sexual even means.

That's more or less the classic textbook answer I would guess.

But I would think it incomplete because people can develop sexual fetishes after childhood and often enough without any specific event being the prime cause.

I know for myself that I picked up a few sexual peculiarities/fetishes simply by reading about them and then imagining myself experiencing them. One would be spanking, medfet or various aspects of transgendering. I cannot for the life of me recall any childhood instance where such things happened to me in any way. And yet through reading or viewing imagery, these things struck a chord in me somehow and ended up developing into a sexual like.

I know that is just a partial answer because how does a person by just reading about a certain type of unusual sexual activity, develop a fetish without necessarily having experienced anything linked to it, except in the mind?

I guess the classic answer to that is sublimation of memories and forgetting. But that often sounds like a cop-out or far too easy an explanation.

Anyway, this is something I've pondered deeply on, wondering why in the world I have been burdened/blessed with such less than usual sexual attractions. Why me and not my friends?

I hope to hear other members take.

I guess my medical fetish came from childhood experiences in hospitals.

As long as I can remember, i was deeply into blindfolds.

I suppose that since i was born in winter, i was treated by some kind of phototherapy. And for eyes protection there blindfold was applied.

Maybe the sensation of blindfold reminds the time when there is no problems in my life except for eat and poo.

Also i am quite sadistic and especially like to tie up and give enemas to cute girls.

I am not exactly sure about the roots of this kinks. But in normal life i am very anti-hierarchical person. I am not interested in making anybody obeys to me. And vice-versa. Not interested in anybody commands me. Maybe this behavior is compensation of my personality.

Most of mine are from personal experiences not all though but most. Like my medical fetish started when I was about 16 and went to my moms gyno exam. I probably would not have it if not for that. That’s also how I grew to like water sports from the exact same place. And it’s how I got more into feet as well cause I already kind of liked them then seen them in that position and it just sparked something. Of course at that age you realize a lot more than you did as a kid. About all of my fetish started around that time. One I recently gained was exposure which I got from a video of someone bringing someone to their gyno exam with them lol. My other fetishes are from personal experiences too the ones I haven’t listed on this post. So I’d definitely say it’s from experiences.

Interesting question. If you pose this question to 100 people that have at least one fetish, you'll likely get 100 answers. But as other's have already said, for me it seems to stem from some real-life experience. It might be one that you don't consciously remember as the trigger, but it had some impact on you nonetheless. And did that experience cause you to have a particular fetish, or was it merely the trigger for something that you were born with?

Why do I have a medical fetish? Most likely I had a memorable experience (or two) at the doctor's office when I was young. Do I remember exactly what that was? No. But that had to be the trigger for that fetish. Looking back now, it was likely the power exchange between doctor and patient that triggered my inborn need to be submissive.

What about my love of jockstraps? My guess is that's from being forced to wear them in high school P.E. class. Then having to wear just a strap for my high school sports physicals. That one actually checks off the jockstrap and medical fetish boxes!

In the last few years I've come to realize that I'm really a submissive that craves domination by someone else. That could be a doctor in a medical situation, or a coach/teacher in a school/sport/P.E. situation. And now it extends to bondage play with a Dom. The key in all those situations is that I'm giving up control to someone else, and being forced to do things that wouldn't be considered normal or acceptable in other situations. For example, going into a little room, stripping completely and being touched and viewed by a strange person. You wouldn't normally do that, but that's exactly what happens when you visit your doctor for a physical exam.

My medical fetish started with me secretly playing doctor with a girl my age when I was a very young boy.

What about my love of jockstraps? My guess is that's from being forced to wear them in high school P.E. class. Then having to wear just a strap for my high school sports physicals. That one actually checks off the jockstrap and medical fetish boxes!

I was never forced to wear them in pe, but I did have to wear them for a couple sports I played. I totally see where you are coming from with that one.

I never found jockstraps erotic, until I was forced to wear one.

Great question, and great answers so far.

As one who has several fairly strong kinks, fetishes perhaps, I have spent a good deal of time pondering this question, as most of us have I’m sure.

I find the subject, top to bottom, interesting as hell. As @agracier put it, why did this blessing/burden of the heart and all things medical hit me, and as for the neighbor? He’s into girls with hiccups. You can’t make it up. There is discussion that breaks down to phobia to fetish. From something you fear to something you love. I buy into that heavily. Also that it happened in childhood. Something non Sexual got brushed with Something else perhaps, that was sexual? Had to be. I spent time as a child thinking of and/or getting access to my fetish items. This before puberty. Before i even knew what a sexual urge was, I was having them. And those urges have only gotten stronger over time. More refined.

And while these kinks of mine can be a very difficult itch to scratch at times…And knowing my perfect partner probably doesn’t exist and probably may never…Still wouldn’t trade my blessings. They have brought me far too much pleasure to even consider.

I hope we hear from lots more folks.

Being exposed to something at an early age that becomes fetishistic later.

@ Luvnurses62

There is discussion that breaks down to phobia to fetish. From something you fear to something you love.

That I will buy into. And even though I was never spanked or made to dress up as a girl for humiliation, these were things that I dreaded happening to me as I had heard enough of such things happening to other kids or heard them tell about their experiences. The same for medical exams and such. I'd heard fellow kids in school tell about their naked exams that included rectal exams and such.

But then comes the crux of the matter: how does fear turn into attraction and pleasure? What causes the turn-around?

And also, what about fetishes that aren't caused by initial (childhood) fear? What about sexual practices that almost at first sight seem to have been custom designed for you? Those exist too.

For instance having a foot fetish or high heels is not that rare, but who would ever have been afraid of or feared a foot or high heels?

@agracier ,

I wouldn’t begin to know the mechanism from fear to fetish, or even if there is such a thing. I mention it due the fact I have white coat hypertension…..I dislike that feeling of embarrassment? Panic? Anxiety? So much, I avoided a doctor for a decade, give or take. Hate it. All through that decade, my strongest kink. Fetish. Fantasy. Then and now, is blood pressure. My number one fantasy involves a medical professional measuring my blood pressure. Every time. There will be lots of other things happening around and to me, other players, other kinks. But the blood pressure. The heart. Stethoscope. Pulse palpation. Every. Time.

As time has progressed and I have aged, as do we all…That fear and embarrassment I once had regarding my complete lack of control over my own body has been replaced with a rush of sorts. A release of Some chemical I crave. Over and over. All this is extremely difficult to explain. Hell, I don’t understand it…Much less to explain to the internet. Ha ha. I do like to try though, as I find the entire discussion extremely interesting.

The big question now being, which came first? My answer being that I THINK the fetish was first. For me, anyway. And with that, my entire premise of phobia to fetish is shot. As I can relate both words in the explanation, it seems more prudent than any other random theory.

Thoughts?

There is the possibility I have “forgotten” or suppressed the initial “phobia“ incident??

Edit 1: Left out important text.

I have this booster pack that I hook up to fetish. It starts even on cold days with it.

Terrible joke

Like any other habit good or bad it feels good and makes the pleasure reward light go on in the brain so it keeps sending the do-it more command creating a method of getting the happy juice going.

I have broached this topic before. As stated many come from childhood experiences. Freud theorized that somehow negative experiences as a child can turn into a desire for those experiences later in life. I have seen former students post on FB that they hated naps and spankings as a kid, but now relish them. (The things our brain do for some reason? To erase the negative by making it positive?)

For myself I developed the kink or fetish of spanking after watching a neighbor spank her daughter bare bottomed. I was never spanked, but witnessing that scene was and is still imprinted in my mind. The mother pulling a spatula from drawer, the daughter beginning to cry as she knows what is about to happen. Her tears as she was taken in hand and her struggle as her mother pulled down her pants. Watching her mother deliver a good spanking and the cries that ensued. I was fascinated.

Enemas? Received an enema when I was very young. But what sparked the fetish? An attractive friend of my mother relating how she gave her daughters enemas and to herself. That was it. A few days later I gave myself an enema for the first time with a child enema bulb. I was hooked.

So in my mind it doesn't take much to gain a fetish. A single incident is all it may take.

Things I did not like and dreaded during my formative years over which I perceived sexual overtones.

I have thought a lot about this recently. I looked back at my childhood memories. I think for me it was probably genetic. I remember as young kid that I had a fascination with butts. Why did I have a fascination with butts? Maybe, it was genetic. When I was 5 or 6 years old, I would show my butt to my male friend who was the same age and he would do the same. I found it exciting. When did it in the bushes at the public pool.

I remember bathing as kid that I would wash my butt hole and that sensation felt so good. For next several years, I would rub my butt hole. I would smell my finger and I loved the musty aroma of the butt hole. Over time I would try to stick a finger in but it didn’t go far without being too uncomfortable. Then I eventually started to use the eraser end of the pencil. I just think that I was genetically born anal erotic.

Now as @cnmtman says, I do think that I took the negativity of the belt whooping and turned it into a positive thing. I like butts and he whooped my butt. I started fantasize about him giving me a whooping on my bare butt even he had whooped my over my clothes.

I think fetishes can be genetic or changing a negative experience to positive one or both.

Being human

I’d say most are genetic. My mom was looking over my shoulder the other day and seen some stuff on my phone like feet and medical stuff and said hey your dad likes the same stuff that’s interesting. Lol. Good thing she didn’t see anything else I was into. What sparked my medical kink though was being at her exam. The rest of the stuff I like is probably genetic too. A few of the things can’t be mentioned here. A lot of things were triggered at her exam though. Like my pee kink and some other stuff. The rest of the stuff just came about naturally.

For me, my pee fetish started when my teenage face was soaked by my teenage girlfriend as I was licking her vagina in my car. She was in the passenger seat, legs spread with feet up on the dashboard. I was crouched down between her legs, licking her clit & vagina. All of the sudden her orgasm exploded, and she either had a squirting orgasm, or lost control of her bladder. Either way, this engrained in me a craving for all kinds of female fluids, including pee and menstrual blood.

Later in life I also developed a craving for pee & cum from guys.

My diaper fetish started when I wore diapers nightly for my bedwetting and around 12 or 13, discovered the pleasures that masturbation provided. I know you can masturbate anywhere, but at 13, having my mom get me ready for bed every night by taking my clothes off, washing and powdering me and then pinning my diapers also caused me to have an erection. I didn't dare touch myself in front of my mom, but as soon as lights were off that's what I did until I ejaculated. A few months later, I was has when I woke up in wet diapers, played with myself again until I came. Doing this daily for the next few years left me with a life long desire go wear diapers, wet them and have sexual adventures in my diapers.

Honestly I ask the same thing but I strongly believe my fetish is because of a childhood friend always playing doctor with me and using doing rectal temps on each other .. so I think it’s something that happen in your child hood the only thing I can think of

Mine is for ladies lace handkerchiefs . When young my big cousin was a thumb sucker and always had to have a lace hanky to hold while she sucked her thumb and to dry her thumb with . As she got older she noticed my penis and she would get me to pee when we were out playing and one of her lace hankies would go round my penis . This felt really nice with the lace stroking against me and i was often erect and dribbling precum for ages until she changed the hanky . My first full orgasm was in one of her hankies .

I have heard of others with nose blowing fetishes with ladies hankies but this doesn't turn me on at all .

School medicals and a doctor who got me naked on the pretext of examining an operation scar then testing the ability to retract my foreskin and you can guess what happened!

School medicals and a doctor who got me naked on the pretext of examining an operation scar then testing the ability to retract my foreskin and you can guess what happened!

Where was the operation scar? I'm going to guess it was from an appendectomy and I suppose it is but a short distance from there to a penis and foreskin ... ha ha.

For me just thinking about things get it started. Then the how do I know if I don't like something if I have never tried it.

Definitely embarrassing naked school medicals.

Peeking at the girls panties on the playground when I was in first grade.

@agracier But then comes the crux of the matter: how does fear turn into attraction and pleasure? What causes the turn-around?

Exactly, and it's only certain fears for which this takes place...

School medicals started it for me, but the ones I had when I was older - teen years. Prior to that I was terrified of having them, but as I got older I came to look forward to them. Now, I am so glad that I lived in times when they were carried out.