Why back in the day enemas were a ladies thing

Many years ago, at the dawn of internet, I ran an enema group for ladies which put me in contact with many women I emailed with outside of the group, and I still am in touch with several. From that, and speaking as a lady of a certain age I'll share with you my perspective on ladies and gentlemen regarding enemas in times past.

If we take 1930 to 1950 as times past women would have taken themselves, had from other women, given to friends, 100 times more enemas than men took themselves, and 10,000 times more enemas than a man would have given to a man — hospitals excepted. With hospitals excepted any enema a male got not self administered would have been from mother or wife.

Sticking with men there are several reasons for so much lower self enema use. Top of list is when men were looking for an orgasm a hand job in the shower, bathtub, with a locked door and a bar of soap to make hand and shaft slide easily was fast, efficient, worked wonderfully and didn't waste time that might then be spent golfing or working in the garage.

Right next to that was a phobia about homosexuality. I'm not saying anti-gay, although there was lots of that, more a belief that anything anal was a gay thing and not to be encouraged for fear one ‘caught’ it. Sticking a hose up your butt to stimulating your anus and then squirting warm water at your prostate was not something real men did. (Thankfully in our enlightenment men have come a long way.)

Also, high on the list was the syringe bag was definitely an intimate item belonging to the wife and about as natural for a husband to use as wearing his wife's delicates (as panties and such were called) would be. Having their own bag would be about as strange. What self respecting man would buy a bag at the corner drug store? If he did for sure he'd have had a little laugh with the pharmacist as he said it was for his wife.

Turning to women. As wife and mother it would be expected by the pharmacist she'd buy a syringe, for douching and to fulfill her role as enema giver to the family. Teenage daughter has period cramps? Mom and her trusty bag to the rescue.

The three top of list things for women were:

First, when they were looking for a sexual self experience, (unlike men, not necessarily measured by having an orgasm) a long enema building and building inside them filling them to the point of panting and a little agony was the perfect slow sensuous experience they needed. A source of great joy and satisfaction even if not taken all the way to orgasm and if not taken all the way pleasurable sensations could be enjoyed and dismissed as just nice, not sexual. The metaphor of a black enema nozzle ‘ejaculating’ white bubble soapy enema into a bottom and a penis ejaculating white cum wasn't lost on either men, or women. Women delighted in the unspoken wickedness of it all. Not men.

Second, America was filled with stay at home moms. Laundry finished and hung on the line, preserves bubbling on the stove for another hour, kids back at school after lunch, kitchen cleaned up; what to do? Been feeling a little off? You did say to yourself this morning you should probably take an enema. Oh dear. Stiff upper lip Maggie. You know you need it, so go do it. Get it done. You'll feel better and then you can relax. And so mom takes off her apron, the phone off the hook, and heads upstairs to fix the enema. As she climbs the stairs she feels the familiar excitement of dread and anticipation.

In contrast, the only time dad might be at home alone is Saturday and Sunday and then it's golf, church, etc.

Third, a female health thing. We ladies were far more concerned about our complexion, then once a month dealing with that bloated feeling, douching to be the sweet smelling wife that douche prep ads told us we needed to be with the logical companion of washing out the other orifice while we were at it.

To top it off, in a way it was exciting, not unpleasant, at least the first quart, and led to all sorts of tingly sensations.

Another men/women, difference in enema taking habits was women were able, often keen, to let another woman administer the enema to them and, if requested give one back in return. A good girl friend, neighbor, might even supply a back and buttocks rub to take your mind off the stress of taking the second quart. Sooooo nice to just lie back and be looked after! Men lighting a scented candle and giving their best friend and former football team mate an enema with encouraging words and a back rub? You can see where my 10,000 times more likely for women than men, above, comes from.

I hope others might comment on the difference in women/men and enemas back pre-1950 or so and what might have been the situation in their home.

When Christmas is past I plan to post something on the welcome revolution, as I see it, of men becoming far more into enemas than was the case in the past.

I think you’re spot on!

LindaB?!

Yes, I remember you from the LEJ. How long ago was that? Almost 25 years? Thanks for sharing this post because I went back and read it through twice. It is so very much spot on and explains a whole lot. Yes, women can (or at least we could in times past) engage others in such discussions whereas men would sooner chew on razor blades, if I can put it that way, than discuss things like enemas with other guys. For several years after we were first married while my husband knew that I took enemas considered such to be an off limits conversation. It was not until he had to have two enemas prior to a sigmoidiscopic exam did he ever open up.

Linda, I'm so happy to know that you are alive and well, and still thinking about this topic with such clarity.

Best,

Chris

There isn't much to add from this male's perspective. You gals have pointed out many of the facts.

We guys were content to leave most of the caregiving responsibilities to you gals who were often referred to as “Doctor Mom”.

Fortunately, some of you were very adept with the enema/douche bag, and other tools, that cured many of our ailments.

Because our macho instincts precluded our open indulgence in certain behaviors, we were slow to adapt. Thank goodness I was able to discover I wasn't alone in many of my own proclivities.

Sse4fun thanks for replying this Christmas Eve!

Chris, AKA Emom, yes it's Linda Brownlee in all her now somewhat aging glory. I'm delighted to catch up with you again. I don't remember what years LEJ was going, but it was a joy to be part of it with the ladies talking and the "boys," out in the garage, welcome to listen in but not to make a noise much less a comment although there were a couple of the boys who did pipe up from time to time.

Sadly, I don't think I have any of the messages from LEJ. It would be fun to see them again. Perhaps some internet archive has them.

Thanks for your spot on vote. I loved your ‘chew on razor blades’ comment. Talk of spot on!

Lovely your husband has opened up on enemas and sounds like big time! You are a lucky couple if you can enjoy and share together.

Many blessings and Merry Christmas, Linda

Many blessings and Merry Christmas, Linda

Hi Linda,

What a wonderful Christmas present it is to hear from you again. I want to say that the last we chatted I was still in my late 30s with a daughter who likely hadn't become a teenager yet. She's now married and a mom of two wonderful grandchildren. Did I say that? I'm still pinching myself on that note in total disbelief. LOL.

As for LEJ, I fear that those exchanges are now gone forever. Nevertheless I am thankful that Zity came along and at least so many of the stories from Speculumpages have been saved. Stay well and have a wonderful Christmas and New Years.

Chris

Great thread. I'm enjoying it. Thanks ladies

In some of the stories I have read about gay Hollywood the gay stars such as Rock Hudson for example who was a big fan “ no pun intended “ of anal sex and was usually a top always had an enema bag or two or three as he enjoyed group sex hanging in his massive shower for six guys to shower at a time . So he would always have his ” boys “ clean out before joining him in his massive bed for the evenings activities. I’m sure many a time he must have enjoyed taking an enema with his “ boy “ as he always enjoyed every part of his sexual evenings . Also In reading a sexual encounter Humphrey Bogart had a gay encounter with a famous producer who when getting ready to engage in sex informed him “ there’s an enema bag hanging in the bathroom ! “ you do know how to take an enema ? “ “ right ? “ Bogart answered “ he did” and the producer told him “ then get in there and use it before you get back in here “ “ and don’t take all night “ So my thought is many gay men in Hollywood as well as other parts of the country in the 40 ‘s and 50’s hustlers and escorts were very used to enemas and I wonder how many found the use very sexually stimulating. So few films of that time exit because it of course with so many things being a fetish or taboo either were never filmed or the film of the practice was destroyed. Such a loss to the gay community as well as a record in general of that time .

Thank you ladies for your perspective on the delicate subject. I think you are spot on.

Great posts. Looking forward to @LindaB ’s upcoming discussion on the ”welcome revolution”. Thanks for your insights.

@Linda_B and @LindaB ???

@Linda_B and @LindaB ???

My bad - @LindaB I fixed it.

My goodness, I thought there were two of us and I was looking forward to meeting my doppelganger!

Moppys Jalopy – glad you're finding the thread interesting. I'd hoped other ladies might jump in with their thoughts but as they say in the UK ‘early days yet.’

Emom/Chris, how nice to be a Christmas present! Although, I confess I'm not quite as delightful unwrapped as I was back in the days when you had a pre-teen daughter and we first talked. Although, and I think thanks to enemas in part and for many other reasons the old bod has aged not too badly. Aren't grandchildren great! Nice thing is you can spoil them and send them home for parents to deal with. All good things in 2022 and I hope we'll talk lots then.

@LindaB

Appreciated both your initial topic title & your following perspective / discussion, which I believe is fairly accurate.

@LindaB Lovely interesting stuff Linda, I think you're pretty much on the button there. Sad there aren't more stories about girlfriends giving one another enemas, set in the 30s through the 50s at least, many of the 'male giver' stories would seem to go against the grain of history. ha Perhaps that's a weird observation.

In a way I'd say these days things seem to have flipped, with more men talking about such things than women. Perhaps that's because now they've gone out of the realm of medicine and into that of 'kink'. I thought it was very pertenant what you said about how women could derive sensual enjoyment from taking an enema while seeing it as strictly a health-enhancing activity, thus avoiding the feelings of guilt about self-pleasure (masturbation) they were probably indoctrinated with.

You've said a couple of times, "as they say in the UK", are you a fellow Britisher? I've pointed out before that stories involving enemas, fact or fiction, from Britain are pretty rare, which seems to fly in the face of the idea that enemas were an English fad originally.

There was a time when women and teen girls were actually ENCOURAGED to douche!

Also, before about the mid 1960s when Miconazole Nitrate Cream was approved as a prescription drug to treat yeast infections, the only way was a week of daily iodine douches! (It's OK to shudder! I did when I first heard about it!) For decades it was the ONLY way!

in the early part of the transition from corsets to girdles, most foundation garments were mostly rubber, and most offices and classrooms were not air conditioned. You can imagine how much worse things were for women at that time in history.

Not long before my Mom would have been reaching early adolescence, povidone, which is a synthetic, less toxic form of iodine became readily available in the form of Betadine Douche Concentrate. That way, at least women with limited access to the medical system at least had some alternative to iodine, which was already known to be toxic. By the time Miconazole came off prescription, it was the mid 1980s. By the time a generic came on the market it was the late 1980s. Betadine douche was available well into my lifetime and in some countries may still be.

As a result, almost EVERY household that was not male-only would have had a douche bag by the time the oldest girl reached adolescence.

Availability of the equipment, combined with the fact that men don't like to admit to not being in charge, further combined with the fact that once you have survived a week's worth of daily iodine douches a couple of rounds of soapsuds enema seems relatively easy.

Women were also seen as “natural” care-givers, and we were often with little gui9dence or non-specific guidance, left to figure it out on their own. Often when they didn't feel that great themselves!!

Emom/Chris, how nice to be a Christmas present! Although, I confess I'm not quite as delightful unwrapped as I was back in the days when you had a pre-teen daughter and we first talked. Although, and I think thanks to enemas in part and for many other reasons the old bod has aged not too badly. Aren't grandchildren great! Nice thing is you can spoil them and send them home for parents to deal with. All good things in 2022 and I hope we'll talk lots then.

Linda:

Thanks for the reply. As for my screen name, it was one of those times when I had to come up with something clever and that's what came to mind. In all honesty I'm much happier being called Chris. As for being unwrapped I tell my husband that I'm like a fine wine: meant to be savored even if not as smooth as it used to be. He has yet to complain. As for grandchildren, yes, we had a wonderful Christmas and we did spoil them, but then as you state so eloquently we sent them and their parents off. Afterward my husband and I just looked at one another, took a deep breath, and had another glass of wine before attempting to clean up the house.

Be well and a Happy New Year

Chris

Wow!! What Linda said in her first post pretty much agrees with how I see things as they developed during my life. I am a “boomer”, so I saw many of the things, and changes, Linda described.

Peter Lawford was famous for his enema parties

Peter Lawford was famous for his enema parties

Check out the thread on “Enema Recipes of Celebrities"

https://en.zity.biz/index.php?mx=forum;ox=display;topic=375

Dearly love Linda’s description, so many clever and accurate metaphors, but in today’s more open culture, I’m certain that enemas are still “largely” a women’s thing. How “largely” is open to speculation, and times have obviously changed, but my gut feeling (it’s because of my sensitive female gut that I take enemas) is, If there’s an enema bag anywhere in today’s home, It’s the lady who uses it most.

If there’s an enema bag anywhere in today’s home, It’s the lady who uses it most.

If only that were the case in my home😢

@LisaK

"...and we were often with little guidance or non-specific guidance, left to figure it out on their own. Often

when they didn't feel that great themselves!!"

Perhaps this goes some way to explaining the mystery I've been banging on about in various posts, i.e that obviously enemas were used by many mothers as a cure-all, when the medical books of the time that I can find definitely do not recommend this. At least two I have specifically state that an enema should not be given except on the orders of a doctor. That being said, they do nevertheless treat the enema as something that every care-giver/home-maker should have the equipment and the knowledge to give.

I have a book called Our Loving Duty, or the Young Housewife's Compendium from... I think 1931, certainly the 1930s, and the enema syringe is on the list of essentials that a woman should take with her if going away for seven days or more.

I fear I have to agree that women are, generally speaking, natural care-givers though. As a rule they tend to be more empathetic, more patient, more gentle than men, and it's a well-known fact that they have more stamina. (Apologies, it's in the list of required items for a household medicine chest.)

Totally agree. Except…I was one of the rare guys who gave his gf enemas. Lots of them. I also took them privately. This was very long ago, in the '60's, and before college. I will post more later.

It was actually more the Women and girls.

Ladies had servants they would pawn it off onto.

Where are all these women Ive been looking for them my whole life.

@H2e4thee said,

Totally agree. Except…I was one of the rare guys who gave his gf enemas. Lots of them.

Like you, I was one of the few guys who gave his girlfriend enemas every month from Junior High thru High School. When we did enemas, we always did a soapy then a salt and baking soda rinse. This got started, thanks to my sister one afternoon when my girlfriend an I were doing our homework together at my house. We three were the only ones home and my girlfriend was obviously not feeling well. I ask if I could get her something and she replied, “no, I started my period today an I need to talk to your sister.” At that, she got up to go talk to my sister. When she returned sometime later, she obviously felt much better. We finished our homework an I walked her home and nothing more was said about what had taken place.

Our parents house was small with only two bedrooms an one bath, hence my siblings an I shared a bedroom until our mid to late teens. After going to bed that evening, I asked my sister what happened and she replied, “she ask me to give her an enema, because she was constipated and having period cramps. I did her like we normally do. First, I gave her a soapy enema, then a salt and baking soda rinse. And before you ask, yes, I used the curved douche nozzle. I moved it back and forth in her, like we do to each other, and she loved it. So, she ask me, “how did you learned to do that?” I told her, “on my two brothers, while giving them enemas. So naturally, when they give me enemas, they’ll do it to me an I like it as much as they do. We got started doing it after grandma taught us personal hygiene and enemas became our responsibility, a little over a year ago. It happened one afternoon when Rick an I got home from school. We were both constipated and needed the bathroom for enema, so I did him and he did me.” She said, “really! Does Rick give enemas as good as you do? I hate my moms enemas, she’s to rough. That’s why my sister an I give each other enemas whenever we can.” I told her, “you won’t be disappointed. Ask him next time, and if I know him, he’ll ask you to reciprocate.” She told me, “I’ll think about it.” And at that, I dropped it.” Then, my sister told me, “don’t say anything to her, let her come to you.” A month or two later, my girlfriend ask, “would you giving me a couple of enemas using the douche nozzle, like your sister did?” I replied, “sure, as long as you do me too.” She laughed, then smiled an I said, “I take it, that’s a yes!” She replied, “lets go, but I’m doing you first.” That was the start of us doing enemas together, primarily during her period, but we did them in between to scratch an itch when it arose. With few exceptions, we did enemas two or three times each month during her period at either my or her house until we graduated from High School, when I went in the military and she went to college. Sadly, during my time in service and her college years, we lost track of each other.

Women are known to make most of the health-related decisions in the family. It’s been like this for generations. If there’s an enema bag kept in the bathroom, among the linens or in a bedroom drawer, it’s very likely that a lady knows where it is, how to use it – and is there enough Vaseline or coconut lube in the medicine drawer? Lol

I certainly agree with Vicki V, Linda B, and the others who believe that women were the primary caregivers and had direct knowledge of the necessary tools and their location. Many of us guys were content to let the women manage these efforts. Some of us likely even expected it. We were too macho to engage in such things with a few minor exceptions.

Once the cat was out of the bag that an enema could trigger such immense sensations, and there were others who shared those same inclinations, and there was this online platform to directly communicate, some of us upped our game to assure that those who had similar desires could carry on these activities with minimal embarrassment or negative consequences.

My collection of enema gear is kept fairly discrete, but certainly available as needed, to provide the utmost in immediate relief for those who willingly could use some medical care or just a pick me up for whatever ails them.

My Mother was the family care giver…. and she was the one who gave me my enemas first with a small red bulb syringe and then after many months of pleading and with my Grandmother's help, she switched to a red Rexall Victoria Combination syringe that my Grandmother had bought for that purpose. Mom, as far as I knew, did not take enemas herself and she could not understand why I loved taking them so much. In fact, Mom once told me, “Mike, I just do not understand why you love taking enemas so much! I have had only one enema in my life and that was right before I had you. And, Mike, if they, doctors, ever tried to give her another one, they'd have to catch me!” As for my Grandmother, taking enemas, I don't think so. But, she was the one who helped me convince Mama to stop using the small bulb and oral laxatives and begin using the hot water bottle syringe on me instead.