A motherly spanking,that has lasted 35 years

I only remeber one childhood spanking, and it can hardly be called a spanking compared to many of the other spanking i have read about in here. I was 4 years old in 1987, traveling by train with my mom and sister. I must have misbeheaved because suddenly my mom took me out on the WC, she calmy lowerd my pants and tol me to bend over, wich I did. I remeber seeing her upside down throgh my legs when I saw her hand comming down. The sound og the smack i never forget, i dont remember any pain, but I was crying and crying. She got my pants up and sat on the toilet with me, holding and cuddling me until I was finnished crying.

Ever since specially a strong growing urge from when I was 10/11 I have had this strong wish to be taking over her knee one last time and spanked hard and long, and i stil have that wish. my mom died 20 years ago so i know it will never happen, but the memory and the wish is still here.

Annyone here who can relate to that or have han idea what migt have happened mentaly with my back then??

Like you, my mom gave me a spanking in my childhood. I didn't like it, and I was scared when my mom announced that she would give me a spanking. But when it was over, I was relieved. My mom was hugging me. I felt absolved because I had already been punished.

I think you felt something similar. Children don't like getting spanked. But the spanking is proof that the parent cares for them. If the child's behavior was concerned with them, they would not punish him. Corporal punishment is unpleasant but of short duration. Then there is relief and the feeling that you have atoned for your sins. Often, when you are older, you want it to be that simple.