Real-life meeting with Sir

Oh to see the faces of those who saw the “smack". Were they happy, surprised, or indifferent. It can't be something one sees everyday while out shopping.

Something that stood out to me last spring and again this visit is Sir’s hands. They are not large. They are soft and smooth. They guide me gently on my back or shoulder or arm when we are out in public. They give incredible massages, whether one sore spot on my lower back that’s been bothering me, all over my back and shoulders or full body. Sometimes I had to tell Him to be a little gentler even though He seemed to be exerting little effort working my muscles. (Seriously, He could get licensed as a masseuse.) His hand spankings can hurt as much as a paddle. He can have me struggling to catch my breath from the pain one moment and then change to touching me so lightly I can barely feel it. Sir would run His hand over the red marks—and compliment Himself, of course—and then gently rub here and there like with the vampire glove but without the ticklish element.

In one spanking I was kneeling on the ottoman next to my bed that my corgi uses as a mid-point to get on and off it and in which I store stuff. It’s a great height for me to rest my upper body on the bed and not put too much pressure on my knees while giving Sir access for lots of stuff. Sir had given a few licks each with a couple of canes. He then focused with His hand on the center lower part of my tush, catching both cheeks with each smack. Hard. I have a high pain tolerance, but this was pushing it.

Then He changed to the evil paddle. The one that is flat on one side and slightly convex on the other. Both sides HURT. He stuck to that same spot. I wanted the spanking to stop, but I wanted to keep taking it until He was finished. He kept going. I wanted to use my safe words, which I’ve done only a few times in all our years of play. My brain was registering the pain, skipped yellow, and said red several times. But my mouth didn’t work for it or any other word.

Finally, tears started. I’m a big crier for all kinds of stuff, like when the lost dog comes home in a movie, or when certain songs come on. I refuse to even watch or read the parts where the dog dies anymore. But I hardly ever cry in pain.

He stopped and asked if I was OK. Not even my head could answer right then. Sir sat down on the ottoman and started rubbing my back and asking again if I was OK. My head tried to answer but my mouth didn’t work yet. I wanted to change position some, but my body didn’t work either, other than the tears continuing. It was most annoying.

After what felt like an eternity, I was able to give short answers, and we decided that He had put me into subspace with the spanking. That was a first for me. It happens regularly with orgasms, but never from pain like that. And it wasn’t the same type, not pleasant floating like after an orgasm. It was a bizarre feeling. A disconnect.

We got me up on the bed, and He kept rubbing my back gently and telling me stuff. I remember Him mentioning a previous sub could go into subspace like that, but I don’t know what else he told me. When all of me finally reconnected with myself, we moved on slowly to vanilla stuff.

Would you believe after all that, Sir had not left even a tiny bruise on me?

Oh to see the faces of those who saw the “smack". Were they happy, surprised, or indifferent. It can't be something one sees everyday while out shopping.

@MissStress we probably got some looks, but none to my face. I did appreciate that He was discrete at times, like when we turned in to one aisle at a grocery store, and a mom and couple of daughters were there. After we got well past them, He said He was going to smack me there, but had to abort suddenly.

😁

Dang SMACKUS INTERRUPTUS!!!

I have met no one here but am glad to just see the vast array of people with the different attitudes, fetishes or interests of the things on here ..

Dang SMACKUS INTERRUPTUS!!!

🤣🤣🤣

I think that I need to clarify that the paddle chester calls evil I call a wonderful job of craftsmanship from BadAss Designs! I was truly surprised when she went into subspace that deep during that particular spanking. Goes to show that the old saying about location is quite true! I should have checked with her closer since I was trying a new location. But since she had taken longer spankings before, I made a mistake! MY bad , I will have to try again to make sure I do it right!

Everyone please note this for the record:

I made a mistake!

I will have to try again to make sure I do it right!

Oh good. 🙄

Sir brought His dog along this time. A 6- to 7-pound maltipoo—Maltese/miniature poodle mix. Named Fuzz.

Who became my protector … of sorts.

I have a corgi. She is good at guarding the house and yard. She alerts to all kinds of stuff, and although friendly, the way she acts to noises that are not the norm, I know she would work to protect me if I were threatened. She did nothing when Sir was here last spring. Not. One. Thing. No matter what He did to me. (Which actually speaks well of Sir.)

Fuzz, on the other hand, made it a point of being right near me whatever Sir and I were doing. He tended to just lie on the bed and keep an eye on us, sometimes dozing lightly. But we had to be sure to put him on the bed before we got started playing.

At my house as Sir and I were getting well into a spanking with me lying on the bed, I opened my eyes to see Fuzz sitting behind Sir staring at Him. Fuzz was most annoyed. I started laughing. Kinda breaks the seriousness of moment. Sir had to stop and put him on my bed. Fuzz came over and checked on me closer and then found a spot nearby to supervise (or “snoopervise” as it’s known in some dog groups).

Fuzz did something similar when Sir was giving me a spanking at the apartment He was renting, this time as I was over His lap on the couch. Fuzz could jump on the couch quite easily, but we were taking up all his space. He managed to find a spot to land, but Sir relocated him.

Remember “tended to just lie on the bed”? The reason he wanted to stay near me was whenever he thought Sir was getting too rough or pushing me to far or whatever, Fuzz would come over and lick my hand or arm and give Sir a dirty look. Pausing a spanking wasn’t too bad. But it sure broke my concentration when he did it while we were playing with the wand or pussy pump or suction cups. And that was kind of hard to get back while I was giggling at him. And my annoyed Sir.

Never a dull moment while Sir is here.

I need to teach him BDSM etiquette!!

There's an ongoing discussion of who is actually in charge in a D/s relationship. Initial thought would be the Dominant because that's just naturally part of the role. But others say the sub has the upper hand overall because of agreeing or not agreeing to submit to the Dominant. (But then if the sub doesn't agree to submit, is the sub really a sub? … All kinds of ifs involved in the discussion.)

Anyway …

We have what may be an atypical D/s relationship because we have become such close friends over the years following my divorce and working through recovery from the abuse I went through. Our relationship moves between total vanilla friendship, including me kidding Him like i would any of my friends and trying to “out-polite” the other in social situations; Him being dominant but asking me for input in what we're doing; and Him being the Dominant and stopping me even in vanilla situations with just a touch of His hand on my arm.

I found He was quite happy, too happy, to let His sub be in charge when He hadn't brought the toy bag to my house but we had time to play. His hand suffices well, and is my favorite for a spanking, and that could have, would have, been enough. But i handed Him a belt and a hairbrush--one with a squishy handle that makes it comfy to hold. He accepted both eagerly.

(I need to lose that hairbrush before He comes back in January.)

I may have to stop at ULTA and get a nice wood brush to replace that loss!!

I may have to stop at ULTA and get a nice wood brush to replace that loss!!

I have one of those. It's in the box I couldn't find. Along with the paddles. And probably a couple of other items. 🙄

And I always wear a belt whether I need it or not!!

So many things can be used for implements of torment, wooden spoons, nice flexible spatula, yard stick, paint stir, mmmmmm yup. I agree a hand is the best.

Sounds like you had a great visit, hope to hear more soon…

🐾

Yeah…Sir gets to return! More future fun and pleasure for the both of you. Something you both have deserved for such a long time.

One of the toys new to me Sir brought was the pussy pump. It’s a plastic cup that fits over that entire area and has a tube ending in a squeeze bulb attached. Wet the edges, press it in place, and pump. It suctions onto the labia, and as the pressure increases, causes swelling and increased sensitivity.

Well, it suctions and causes swelling until it lets go on its own when Sir walks away to get something.

Pop.

It took a bunch of tries (darn) to figure out how wet to get the edge and exactly where to put it. One issue was too far up, and it pressed against the pubic bone as it tightened, which got painful. But too far back, and we didn’t get a good seal. i was really glad He was determined to get it right.

Sir would put it on, sometimes repeatedly, and after letting the area swell, He would apply some lube to the magic wand and place it to vibrate the entire pussy pump. It produced another cool sensation. Didn’t provide the stimulation as strong as directly to the clit or even the labia skin, but it was stimulating. It made me REALLY want Him to take it off so He could put the wand directly on me and let me come.

Then He would (finally) release the pressure and put the wand directly on my skin. i wasn’t as stimulated as when He used the little suction cup directly over my clit, but i was ready … so ready … for more. And He’d let me come. Lots of times. So many times, in fact, that the wand’s head cracked.

Add one dead wand to the four dead rabbits.

Good thing I had another.

I have seen a pussy pump that has a small projection for the clit, will have to do some research before next visit!!

Another new toy was the scorpion whip. Sir didn't show me what all He brought. He would just randomly pull items out and use them. This was one I didn't see coming … literally. He had me face down on the bed and had been using various paddles and canes, pausing here and there to get another. I heard a couple of different swishes and then SNAP. Yikes! Sir applied several licks to my tush. I know He was carefully gauging the force, but even with that version of “gentle,” the leather end has a good bite.

I loved it!

Just like it's namesake, the scorpion tail whip, has a good quick snap and a sting that leaves a nice mark when applied with enough force. It makes a good transition before trying a single tail whip. I may have to mail it before next trip, along with my flogger, which I forgot this trip. It's all about the snap! Or is it the OUCHHHH??

It's all about the snap! Or is it the OUCHHHH??

Now there's a good topic for discussion …

Sir likes being naked. Correction. Sir loves being naked. Sir likes me naked. i didn't have to be naked all the time that we were in contact with each other while long distance, but i did for things like enemas or when we were using the wand or rabbit. i've been overweight most of my life, and because my ex had zero interest in me physically once i got pregnant (and not much before that), i've long had a negative self-image. i was uncomfortable when Sir had me turn on the cam. Sir never made any negative comments about how i looked. He even told me i was sexy, and while i didn’t like being on camera, i got used to it, in part because my whole body was rarely in view.

i had been really nervous last spring when we were getting together for the first time because i was afraid He was going to want me naked in person. We didn’t discuss it. i just figured it’s what He would want, and i was scared that naked or not, He wasn't going to find me attractive up close and personal. But when we got ready to play the first time, i asked what He wanted me to remove, and He let me keep my shirt on—every time—and He confirmed that in person i was sexy. My weight or appearance didn't matter to Him.

When He decided to visit again, He told me well in advance that this time i would be naked. i still really didn't want to do it, but i was willing to submit. That didn't mean i wasn't scared to death. He told me He was fine with how i looked. The catch was i wasn't fine. With a few months to go, i started an eating plan and some supplements that have had good success for others. i've lost about 10 pounds and several inches and have gained a number of physical benefits, like sleeping better. But i still weigh far more than i want to. And i still don't like how i look naked.

It came up in conversation one night before He arrived. And once again He reassured me that He likes how i look and that i’m sexy. And He also told me that i didn't have to be naked. That was one of the best things He's ever given me.

We didn't play much the first few days He was here because He was getting settled in, and we went to a big air show for an entire day. But after that was done, i was over at the apartment He was renting, and we were getting ready to play. He told me pants and panties off and started rummaging in the toy bag as i started removing my clothes. He turned back around, and i also removed my shirt and bra. The look on His face was priceless.

He reached out and stroked one breast and then the other and said how much He liked them. Then He started squishing them gently and confirmed He liked them. Then He started pinching my nipples, and i started questioning my decision … but not seriously. We ended up doing a good bit of nipple play that night.

If He had required me to go naked, i would have done it. He probably would have still done the same things to my breasts that He did and said what He said. But when He gave me the freedom to make the choice and protected my feelings, that respect moved us to a whole different level. As my Dom, He certainly didn't have to do that. But it made me want to give Him something back, and I was able to give Him not just what He wanted physically but a completely free-will submission to something that was important to Him. His response, respect and appreciation means i'm much more likely to do the same kind of thing in the future when i'm doubtful about myself and what He wants.

Which may or may not be a good thing. 🙄

While it is true that I could have required her to be naked when we first met, it is also true that by giving her time, I achieved more since she is more likely to be more receptive and willing to following any requirements that I have in the future. Sometimes it is better to allow the sub to remain in their semi-safe space for them to reach further and be more likely to go beyond their comfort zone.

He gave me the freedom to make the choice and protected my feelings, that respect moved us to a whole different level. As my Dom, He certainly didn't have to do that. But it made me want to give Him something back, and I was able to give Him not just what He wanted physically but a completely free-will submission

@chester89 I fully understand this. I am so pleased for you that you found a dom who is willing to let you set the pace. I also understand the self doubt due to your weight and lack of interest by your previous partner. But I am sure with the live shown to you by your dom. Your self confidence will grow.

After i got naked, Sir shocked me. He did too. He loves being naked, so that was part of it, but it was because i was. He said that some Dominants do that, and some don't. I remember reading discussions about whether the Dominant remaining clothed during play helps with the atmosphere of dominating. I wouldn't say it affected me that way, but it was certainly a distraction.

And with some of what He did, i have to say that Tim Allen may have had the right idea not to stand too close to a naked man. (Of course, when belts, canes, whips, etc. are involved, They don't have to get too close.)

@chester89 I fully understand this. I am so pleased for you that you found a dom who is willing to let you set the pace. I also understand the self doubt due to your weight and lack of interest by your previous partner. But I am sure with the live shown to you by your dom. Your self confidence will grow.

He has been instrumental in helping me get where I am mentally over the past dozen years. My ex was emotionally and financially abusive and physically neglectful. Then my teenage daughter got angry with me about something and remained that way, breaking up the good relationship we had. That left me with no one at home. A friend I had been working with told me she was going to get one of their interns to work on the project because I had finally accepted the pay she had offered me but not given me for each level of the project over several years. And she didn't want to do much of anything else with me either. Several other crises arose in other key areas of my life.

I had gotten completely lost. I didn't care about me, and didn't care much about others. But Sir and several other friends I made here held on to me and helped me find my way back. When my ex blindsided me with a divorce, Sir stood by me. He talked me down and picked me up more times than I can count. He also backed off some from the D/s part of our relationship because friendship was more important, and I wasn't in the right place mentally enough of the time for the other.

But in time, I have come back. And I am as strong, if not stronger than I ever was. I still falter mentally, but not as often, and I don't let people push me around as much as I was. I've been able to reach out to others and help them too. Won't say I'm leading the pack of wolves that my ex and some others back then threw me to, but they would be ill advised to underestimate me now.

It has made the two of us as a pair stronger too.

One of the odder (or more interesting) new things i tried was wax play. Sir has done it before. He had different colored candles that burn cooler. i've gotten wax from regular candles on me before, but it's been awhile, and i can't remember how much that hurt, so i can't really compare the two.

Again i was face down on the bed and naked. (That seems to be His favorite position for me.) He'd light a candle and drip the tiny drops wherever He wanted on my back. Each time it made me jump and gave me goosebumps, but the burn didn't last but a moment. However, with multiple drips in a row, the sensation was continuous for many seconds at a time, occasionally taking my breath away or making me shudder all over. Then He would pause and change candles/colors, apparently creating kind of a mosaic on my back.

Cleanup was interesting. The wax doesn't just rub off. It smears when cooled. We decided to use the straight side a regular place-setting knife to scrape it off. That worked pretty well. The shower curtain under me caught the little bits and pieces. Then He used some baby wipes to clean my skin the rest of the way.

It wasn't stimulating like some other play options were, but it was cool sensations and something i'd do again.

I could have made it more intense by dripping on same spot repeatedly but since it was her first time I decided to keep it light and just on her back instead of more tender areas!!