Warning for Rectal Exams

I had a girlfriend once who said that her OBGYN would never warn her before rectal exams. However on instructional videos they always explain the procedure before it happens.

What have people experienced? Warning or no warning? If a warning what would the obgyn say?

My current OBGYN makes sure that she explains everything before she does anything. It is probably while I feel so relaxed and happy with her.

When I was younger my pediatrician probably only told me once or twice what he was about to do. I believe it was something along the lines of “this may feel uncomfortable” and then I’d feel his finger violate me. As I got older I’d tense up when I’d feel his fingers spread my cheeks open knowing what was coming next.

This is a good question.

I think for some doctors they take the attitude you came to see me so I am going to do what I think I need to do to address your problem or issues or your physical or yearly exam as I see and want to do. Especially pediatricians and GYN doctors.

Seems from what is written here by other members there are those that care and inform patients step by step and then there are those that that just do as they please.

And I have been in the exam room with the doctors and patients and seem some of both approaches.

Every patient has the right to know what is happening and why and to question any medical professional about a procedure or treatment and such and you can say NO!!!!!!!!

@ccm93 Her post indicates that her pediatrician gave her rectal exams. My pediatrician examined my anus visually, but I never had a rectal exam until I was an adult. Is it normal for girls to have rectal exams?

My wife's previous ob-gyn said to her once "you know whats next". At her last exam her gyn said "I have to do a rectal" and my wife's reply was "OK". At her last physical with her primary, the doctor did not say anything initially but my wife saw her put on a glove and took out the KY jelly. My wife said "I guess thats for me" and her doctor said "bottoms up". True story.

In my experience it's pretty common place for my wife's ob/gyn to verbalize what is coming next. Not all her ob/gyns have done the recto-vaginal exam on a regular basis, but the ones who have done it have generally let her know if was coming...

My current OB/GYN does them. He’s good at letting me know what he’s about to do before he does it, usually along the lines of “I’m going to perform a quick rectovaginal exam.” Even with the warning though there isn’t much time to think about it before it happens. The first time he did one I was pretty surprised by him saying he was going to do a rectovaginal, and before I knew it it was already happening. I’ve come to expect them at the end of my exams now, so there is much less of a surprise element.

Sometimes I've been warned, sometimes I haven't.

I had rectal exams from two different doctors in the past year, one male, one female (gastroenterologists, not OB/GYN). Each said the same thing after a brief visual exam of my anus, “I’m going to insert my finger now.” Done gently but firmly and thoroughly.

My doctor always tells me everything before she does it. When she gets to the rectal exam she usually says that she is about to do a rectal and it is the part we all hate but it will be over in a jiffy and we will be all done. Then I feel her finger with the cold lube on it. She slides it in slow. Well I mean not real slow like sex slow but she doesn't just jab it in.

Most of the doctors who have given me rectal exams, both male and female, don't say anything, although some have said 'this is going to feel cold, try to relax,' or some such thing. One of them is very good about talking me through it; he gets me to relax.

Then again, I usually can tell by the position I'm in, that's going to happen, though I have to say, my first one, I was on my side and really didn't know he was going to go in. And I was young..ish.

In play, if I thought it would heighten the patients arousal during an exam, I would not say anything, but at work I talk the patient through everything I do.

@Tulip23 also when you play, tell to your patient that she will receive a rectal exam (maybe ordering her to take an embarrassing position) could increase a lot her excitement!

I have always had some warning. But it varies between doctors.

“One more thing. I need to check your bottom. Try to relax”. Followed by penetration. I think I had 5seconds to comprehend what was happening before she was knuckle deep in me. I can’t imagine the complaints she must get. I loved it but I’m a weirdo.

“I’d like to do a rectal next. *changes gloves*. It’s just a well lubricated finger. It allows me to better feel your uterus and check a few other things. Is that ok?” Hey I have a choice here. Ten seconds between my yes and her finger.

I've had my doc for 10 years, so I know what to expect. She warns me, "Rectal is next, take a deep breath." No big deal, feels like getting an oversized suppository. I want to be clean down there, so I take a bulb enema about an hour before leaving for my appointment.

My doctor is very gentle when doing a rectal exam and she gives me enough warning so I'm not caught by surprise. And I appreciate that! Although I am anally erotic by nature, I'm really not when in the doctor's office. It's business, not pleasure to me.

On one occasion, I had to see one of the older doctors in the practice who had a reputation of being gruff and rough on her best day. The day I had to see her (my regular doctor was on maternity leave) she drove into my rectum like a Mack truck with no warning at all. I was sore for hours afterwards. And then I made up my mind that if I had to see that particular doctor again, I'd just leave the practice and find another doctor.

Deb

My gf's doctor has always told her before he does it. We didn't know about that at her first one and was pretty surprised. He explained that it was very important especially because we have anal sex, and then he did it. The actual insertion was still a surprise to her, and she squealed a little. It's sure not her favorite part of the exam, but I admit that I really like it. It's happened at every annual since.

Of the various doctors and gynecologists I've been to, they have all given some type of warning before a rectal exam. Words and phrases have varied, from a simple “you'll feel my touch" to a more descriptive “I'll do a rectal / recto-vaginal exam next….I know it's uncomfortable and no one's favorite but it's important…..cool touch...and some pressure…..” and then it's happening, the finger / fingers penetrating me.

@jill2doctor you stated that during rectal exam you have either one or two fingers in your rectum? I must admit I have never heard of somebody having two fingers during real examination, so I'm curious. Was it during play exam or real, and if real, why were two fingers needed?

@jill2doctor you stated that during rectal exam you have either one or two fingers in your rectum? I must admit I have never heard of somebody having two fingers during real examination, so I'm curious. Was it during play exam or real, and if real, why were two fingers needed?

@Dr_Davian No sorry, you misunderstood. I was talking about my real exams. No doctor has ever used 2 fingers in my rectum. If I'm getting a rectal exam it's 1 finger. If I'm getting a recto-vaginal exam, it's 2 fingers, one vaginally and one rectally.

This is a gynecology topic and it is for LADIES! I think the men who posted on it should not talk about their own asses on this topic ok?

Anything In the last 20 years has come with a warning. Before then I was at least told to ‘bear down like you’re making a BM‘ before though he didn’t specify exactly what he was going to do.

I have to agree with Amethyst.

Why so many of the men add there 2 cents when they should just sit back and read the responses surprises me.

The only time I have ever medically ever had no warning, was during labor.

I had made it clear, pre-L&D for my eldest son - who was being delivered by a new-to-me OB - that I did not want to be cut during labor.

When it was time to start pushing, I suddenly felt the doctor’s fingers in my rectum, which was something entirely unexpected, as this had never happened before in any of my prenatal visits.

I had back labor, too, and at one point - because they decided that it was not a good idea to give me an epidural and I was in a lot of pain, I was given a shot of Nubain. That was the first time I had ever had anything like that. I felt the sting in my thigh, I protested a little, then suddenly felt instantly drunk.

Then Doc’s fingers were THERE.

Looking back on it, it’s funny to me. It was the weirdest sensation. Pain, then insta-drunk, then finger(s) in my rectum. He was moving them around doing who-knows-what… and I remember saying something irreverent to him….

Then he and my husband both laughed…. And he said “you told me you do not want to be cut, so I’m helping you out so you don’t need to be” or somesuch.

Long story short, I did not need to be, and later on when my head was on straight and I was recalling, I looked it up… it’s more of a massage that is done vs. a rectal exam, but as I mentioned, I was woozy.

I was at my annual today, seeing a new doctor at the practice. At the end of the exam she did a bimanual and then turned around. I started to sit up. She typed something into the computer.

“Have you ever had a rectal exam?”

“A uh the finger back there?” I kinda muttered. And never really had a chance to respond to the question.

“Yeah I need to put my finger in your bottom to feel the back of your uterus.”

“Don’t worry. I’ll use lots of lube. “. The nurse then smiled and handed her a glove.

“Try to relax”

I don’t feel like I ever really consented. But was given opportunity to say no. That’s the power of the doctor folks.

Her finger pushed in then paused. A real just the tip moment. I felt the familiar cold sensation and then cringed. No matter how often it happens I still get a feeling of disgust at first. It feels like I’m shitting myself. In reverse. And you can’t shake that feeling.

Then the classic “does this hurt? I know it feels weird”. She must have been reading my eyes.

She pushed on my belly. Her finger turned. And then finally slipped out.

Weirdly, I leave all horny. Racing home to tell you all about it.

After my doctor would complete my papsmear she let me know in a sweet calm voice that she was going to do a quick rectal. She would lube up her finger & gently insert her finger into my rectum

My doctor has said: "my finger, cold jelly, lots of pressure."

The one time it happened in a gynecology exam the physician’s assistant warned me when she gave me the gown. He’s old school, she said.

Ive had two really quick rectal exams at the end of a gyn exam, but literally in/out in two seconds.

During play exams i love being given a warning.

It's not a question it's simply a statement about what is about to happen to you next.

"Im going to slide my finger into your rectum now just relax."

Ugh so hot