Greetings of the New Year!
Wow - I've been busy and it's actually been a while since I had a thermometer (or anything) in my ass ---
--- so I was thinking about taking my temperature to start the New Year off right.
It was so cool --- New Year's Day at my place, in the afternoon. I just dropped my sweatpants and panties, and using some saliva as lube, laid on my back, spread my legs and slid the glass thermometer in my ass! I also put a digital thermometer under my tongue.
I had set a time for 4 minutes - so I just lay there rubbing my pussy and occasionally moving the thermometer in and out of my ass.
When the alarm went off, I checked the temperatures (standing there with my sweatpants and panties around my knees). Of course, the digital thermometer had beeped long ago but I just kept it in place.
ORAL temperature - 98.1 degrees --- RECTAL temperature - 99.3 --- (1.2 degree variance) I considered that maybe I should use a glass thermometer for both readings - maybe even washing off the rectal thermometer with both alcohol and soap & water and using the same one. The idea appealed to me and I stepped out of my sweatpants and panties, remaining now only in the Harley-Davidson t-shirt (no bra underneath) that a friend of mine gave me after we rode together (motorcycle, nothing else!)
I was in the bathroom wiping the glass rectal thermometer with an alcohol swab when I hear a pretty firm banging on my door. What could this be? I tried to ignore it, but whoever it was kept doing it. I set the thermometer on the counter, put my sweats and panties back on, and went to the door. It was a man in a work uniform, I recognized it as the local gas company and two firemen with him. I opened the door and, outside, I saw several fire trucks, police cars, and two ambulances.
"Ma'am, we suspect that there is a serious electrical shortage in certain circuits in this building. It could be very dangerous for you to remain in here," the maintenance man said.
Pointing to a building at the other end of the parking lot, the fireman said, "We've already extinguished three fires in that building and your building is wired just the same."
After some conversation, the bottom line was they suggested that I vacate for 24 hours until they could inspect the building and the individual units. I was to change nothing in the unit - in other words, don't plug anything in, don't turn on any light switches, don't use the oven, etc. Pack a bag and leave the unit as quickly as possible - they handed me a voucher for the Marriott Hotel close by. So, I packed up my things and got out of there.
January 6, 2019 - No further rectal temperature activity, my place is fine after a circuit box rewire, and I've been back in for 4 days. I've been pretty busy but it was "funny" to see the rectal thermometer still lying on the counter when I returned! Anyhow, I went to the gym yesterday and my friend introduced me to a Trainer who suggested I start the day off right with the FIT3D Body Scan (http://www.fit3D.com) - it's pretty cool, so I did it, didn't cost anything as a promotion if I renewed my membership for another year. No problem - I was going to do that anyhow.
So - you go into a private room and you can strip down as much as you want - they suggested bra & panties for females would be fine. What the heck? I took it all off! You stand on a platform as straight and tall as you can, head up, looking forward - and then you grab some handles at your side, pull them up and push the button, and the thing starts. A red light runs up and down a bar in front of you and the platform slowly rotates, twice, and then you're done. You step off of it, get dressed, and leave the room - report to follow by e-mail in 5-6 minutes. The report gives a very good "picture" of what the machine saw (and I sure hope nobody else sees it, or maybe not) and then a lot of parameters about your body. I'm doing OK on BMI but I didn't know that, compared to the measured population, my head is tilted .4% to the left, whatever that means.
My friend was waiting for me outside the room and we worked out together, but on my mind was standing naked for that machine while a "procedure" was done! I found it strange that it could take all sorts of measurements but you had to enter in your height! Then, for a moment, I fantasized that a rectal probe would be inserted - either by the machine or the recipient. Wouldn't that be cool?
Needless to say, I had a "good time" in the shower, but something was still missing. When I got home, I immediately picked up where I left off on New Years Day. I stripped naked and used the alcohol wipe and soap cleaned rectal thermometer to take my oral temperature - lying on my bed naked with my Mac and going through some e-mail. ORAL temperature was 99.0 (a .9% increase from several days ago).
Then, I lubricated the thermometer with the K-Y from the nightstand and, still on my side, slid it into my anus/rectum (ass). OH! It felt so good! I turned over on my stomach and quickly left e-mail mode to the link I have for the PLAY DOCTOR Rectal Temperature Tutorial (https://xhamster.com/videos/tutorial-rectal-temperature-2633256) because it is 5+ minutes long and keeps me very well entertained while the thermometer is registering! Yes, I reached back to rub my buttocks and "adjust" the thermometer a bit, and pushed my hips against the bed - but I didn't want to get aroused too much and adversely affect the temperature reading. As the video came to an end with Nurse Ashley lying on the exam table having just taken her rectal temperature, I removed the thermometer from my anus, wiped it, and read it. RECTAL temperature was 100.5 (a 1.2% increase from several days ago). And, there is a 1.5 degree variance between the two measurements.
I took my temperature(s) about the same time [3 PM] each day - so, the only difference may be that (1) there may have been error with the digital thermometer; (2) the higher temperature occurred after working out, and the higher spread with rectal because of slight arousal, and; (3) approaching my period in about a week?
Very interesting - I may have to do this again soon!