Fear to spank

I totally love being spanked. I love the sting and pain of it, but every lover that I have doesn't have the endurance to spank me and is afraid to hurt me. I've only had one lover who had spanked me and it was only a few smacks! I need someone who will sit there and get enjoyment out of punishing my bum and other places on my body! How on EARTH do I do this?! X.x

Hi Nikki. I think that you should check your profile for your age. Most of us seniors want less vigorous stimulation. Your age confuses me.

Many of us think a spanking is SUPPOSED to hurt and that there's nothing wrong with a bit of sting remaining the next day. There are, in my experience, a couple of ways to approach this. One is straightforward: a discussion of what you want a spanking to accomplish and what a "good spanking" is for you. Another is more lighthearted "didn't hurt" or "is that all you got?" Either way, feedback has to help.

Spanking hurts and everyone knows about it,.

Fear comes when know that a spanking is coming especially when you are waiting for it. It is the anticipation of the pain that is to come and barring your bottom. This tensions build up the fear in the us:

Oh so true “ the anticipation of the pain that is to come and barring your bottom”… now that my first proper spanking is happening soon, this is my reality.

I totally love being spanked. I love the sting and pain of it, but every lover that I have doesn't have the endurance to spank me and is afraid to hurt me.

I too would be very wary of hurting someone or, which is more probable, of someone thinking that I expressly wanted to hurt them. And thereby creating all kinds of potential problematic and resentful feelings and possible consequences of accusations.

Even with a long time spouse or partner, you never know what might set them off or really know what they think is over the line, especially when it comes to sex.

It has to be consensual which means guidelines, wants, needs have to be clear before.