How would you approach...

How would you approach your partner to bring up the possibility of getting Dominated by someone else? A friend is a sub with a sub girlfriend. He wants to have more "control" in his life, but she isn't giving him that. He cares greatly for her, doesn't want to hurt her in any way, but still needs that time to be made to be submissive. Any help will be passed on to him. Thanks.

Of course MissStress, you know that communication between two IN this lifestyle is key. The vehicle to do so is sometimes the quandry. Yrs ago I "mentored" a sub female, longing to convey her hungers to her nilla spouse. Although this suggestion may not work for A/all.... it certainly did for her. I had her begin a written diary, that was left OUT and OPEN for him to read in her abscence. She did. He read, and even wrote a reply in it to her, for later reading. They have begun to enjoy the lifestyle now, and STILL use this method for communicationg emotions and needs to each other.

Hope this helps.....

Regards.... Blister and HIS shy

Thanks. I did email him back and told him to just talk to her and tell her what he needed. Maybe she needed to learn how to be more Dominant. I suggested she could attend a session(s) to learn ways that made him feel more sub. Thanks again.

There's very deep water there, and I don't think it's easy to give useful advice without knowing the people involved.

I agree with the idea of the written journal being left (not obviously). If the person is not generally associated with writing in a journal, then possibly a letter that has been started (but not quite completed) being written to a friend but left someplace with the hope it would be noticed.

If a shared email account is utilized, then leaving something in the inbox or draft folder with a catchy subject line that might be noticed. Maybe leaving a printed copy of an email (sent to himself from a fake, temporary account) left on the printer, desk or in the top of the garbage can (writing side facing up).

The last time he emailed he said things had improved by just have an open and honest discussion with her. Was glad to hear progress was being made.

Isn't it wonderful how sometimes the most simple of methods works the best? Straightforward communication, for example. =]

I like to introduce small things while having sex. People are more receptive to new things in the heat of the moment. Start small though.

I haven't done this, but only read about it, a supposedly true story:

A married couple who were both sub, and neither wanted to take the dominant role - ever. The wife found herself a master outside of the marriage, but the husband didn't find himself a suitable mistress. At one of her sessions, she asked her master if he would top both her and her husband. He was reluctant at first, since he isn't gay, and really had no interest in dominating a male sub. He enventually found ways to incorporate the subby-hubby into the sessions with the wife. Occasionally bringing in a mistress to participate, but the couple seemed to like it best with just the master.

I agree, communication is key and needs to be ongoing. If you are already on the same page, the exploration is constantly evolving.