The Pain/Pleasure Line

I have found, especially when I was young and getting spanked. That a good spanker took me on tours across the pain pleasure line. For example when the spanking started, it stung! And there was no reason to think that I was going to get "used" to it. But I did. Then it just got sexy hot.

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Recently I posted about receiving a punishment spanking from my wife at my request with the Derlin cane and it was meant to hurt and it did. Three days later, I had her follow up with a second punishment spanking using the wooden paddle with holes in it.

Aside from those two punishment thrashings, all of my spankings have been for pleasure, not that these don't hurt--they do. My wife kindly warms me up for three to five minutes with light and then medium smacks. If she starts out striking too hard, I ask her to back off because it hurts too much when I am not mentally prepared for it like I was for the punishment spankings. After the warmup, my wife then increases the intensity of each strike.

Once I am warmed up, my wife can really go to town on my bum. She has in the past, on a few occasions, truly blistered my butt, resulting in significant black-and-blue bruising. Once the butt cheeks are red with blood and the spankee is turned on, the increased pain becomes pleasurable.

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I have a little bit of a hate-love relationship with pain. I find it difficult to bare pain... But some pain really turns me on. I love pain on my nippels for instance and in my dental fetish I have very masochist fantasies that would probably be not everyone's cup of tea. Also I dont know if I can bare this extreme pain for real.

When it comes to spanking for me that line is hard to find sometimes. Even when I’m at that point where all I can really focus on is how much it hurts, there is still a certain pleasure I’m deriving from it. That never really seems to go away.

The limit that I’ve set for myself is anything that might cause a lasting injury or cause real bleeding. But even then, I don’t mind a little bit of blood if it’s just the surface of the skin that’s been broken - I tend to like the sort of marks that leaves me with.

I’ve had some comments on a few of my pictures that I’ve uploaded where some people have expressed that certain welts from canes are too much, but I’ve always enjoyed receiving those. I think the only time I’ve reached a hard limit in terms of pain was when I decided I wanted to try being hit with a guitar string. There was nothing fun or pleasurable about that feeling. It felt like a deep cut, nothing like what I’ve experienced from even the whippiest of canes or other implements. It only took 2 good strokes before I used my safe word, and it’s still only one of a couple times I ever needed to use it.

I use pain in erotic spanking.

The main aspect of erotic spanking is clearly neither pain nor anticipation alone, but a combination of physical stimulation, emotional tension, and the psychological dynamics of power and trust.

However, when we look specifically at pain vs. anticipation, most people involved in erotic spanking often report that:

Anticipation plays a key role.

It is the tension, the thrill of control, the anticipation of the next stroke, or the emotional build-up that increases sensitivity and sexual desire.

For many, it is the anticipation or the pauses between strokes that are more exciting than the physical contact itself.

Pain is a means, not an end (usually).

In an erotic context, the pain is mild to moderate in intensity, often with elements of pleasant burning or heat that can be sexually stimulating.

Definitely still understanding this. Im very new to spanking. Excited & scared at the same time. My first one hurt a lot and I loved it… very strange. Want to do it again. Maybe raise the level a bit though? 😬

I think the enjoyment in the pain partly comes from the partner. It means that your play partner is someone you trust enough to allow them to hurt you and be vulnerable with.

Growing up in a strict family that believe in spanking and me being the more "adventuresome" daughter I received more than my share of spankings but only from my mother were that were almost always over her knee on my bare bottom. A lecture came first and then the spanking which was usually by hand, but the dreaded hairbrush or even worse the paddle would come out for major or repeated transgressions. However, the spankings were never done in anger nor frustration on my mother's part and afterward I would be sitting on my mother's knee and hugged and told how much I was loved and cared for along with being encouraged to do better in the future. I was than dismissed and the subject was not brought up again unless repeated. It seems strange, but being spanked from a little girl up until the end of high school and a few times when home for the summer from college, made me feel closer to my mother even to this day. I feel the same way when my husband feels the need to spank me. 😃

Now more to the point of the question......spanking did hurt!! and a lot more with the hairbrush or paddle!! But there was a point as I got older that the discomfort would somewhat lessen and the pleasure would begin to trump the pain to some degree. The real pleasure came after I was dismissed when I was dismissed and I would uusallygo to my room. 😃

Denise

For me I love the burn and sting along with the sound that a wooden paddle gives on my bare bottom.

A good warm up allows me to enjoy a longer and harder paddling.

My favorite sessions are holding a 2 quart enema and then bend over grabbing my ankles and hold on tight for a sound paddling, usually 50 to 100 swats.