Do your BDSM relationships/fantasies have games more mental than physical?

I am a switch (mainly sub) but I do have my dominant side. My fantasies involve psychological punishment or humiliation, but no pain or cruelty. For example, I like being made to wear panties and then be mocked by a domina, even though I am not a cross dresser, sph, etc. I dated a girl who was also a switch and she and I loved cornertime for her, making her kneel with her mouth open for 3-4 minutes at a time (a longgg tme in real life!) while I teased her making her wait for me to spit in her mouth, etc. Do your BDSM realationships and fantasies involve a cruelty/pain aspect, or are the games more mental than physical

Among the most popular scenes in my writing (I write erotica, including FemDom and BDSM) was a scene in which a man who is not interested in cross dressing or forced feminization is made to wear his Domme's sheer panties during a paddling that turns his butt pink, easily seen through the cloth. He is not allowed to get dressed for an upcoming Zoom call except for adding a shirt.

Both doms and subs liked that part. For the character, it was way more about the humiliation than the pain, which was nothing out of the ordinary.

Hehe, why not both? After all, cheese and crackers are both better together.

I really like the idea of predicament bondage, either as self-bondage or as a scene with a dom. The idea of being made to choose between two different methods of pain/humiliation or having to willingly alternate to the other when one becomes too much is very fun. Being forced to participate in that way adds an extra level of humiliation.

Fantasies involving two subs can also be set up to do this really well. I’m thinking of a video I’ve seen where two girls were tied together face to face, sharing a ball gag and both were being whipped and spanked. There could be endless variations to play with - being forced to kiss, hold hands, give/receive oral, and countless other things while some sort of pain is being inflicted. Or, one of my favorites: one of the girls being made to drool into the mouth of the other while one of them is getting spanked or whipped. 🥵🥵🥵