Finding a spanking partner

I'm a bit surprised how difficult it is to find a spanking partner. I have had a few nice experiences being spanked by women I have connected to in online forums but disappointed by apparent scarcity of women who like to spank. I am not trying to complicate the relationship with a sexual component - I just want to be over the knee of a strong woman that is warming my bare butt. I hesitate to go the professional disciplinarian route - they are typically distant and (for me) pricey. I am interested in hearing any tips from the ZITY membership about how to fulfill the in-person experience I am seeking.

Never met a gal who liked to spank, but did meet those who liked being spanked, which has me wondering what the ratio of gals who like to be spanked versus those who like to spank. Also wonder how this compares to gals who like enemas.. Okay, sorry, for going a bit off-topic.

Attend a National Spanking Party. They occur at different times in different places. Might even met females from your area.

I am VERY lucky!! 48 years ago on our 1st date ( I later found out) she knew that she was going to marry me! Very soon we were in bed, then living together. Perhaps a year after I brought home a paddle and asked her to spank me! As soon as she saw how hard I got she got WET! As she is a take charge woman, and yes domineering in our marriage, she took to spanking me like a duck to water! Almost 47 or so years of being spanked by her for fore play and or punishment, as well as when she wants to and or because she can!

Probably like so much else the number of women who would be willing to do it if they stop worrying about what "good girls" do and do not "do" is larger. Like most here I chose mine based on other factors and am slowly working on getting her kink tolerance/interest up. Very slowly. She still says "that would hurt you" when I ask her to spank me. I haven't had the guts to reply "that is the point" 😉

I have this issue too. I prefer to spank but I've had a hard time finding a partner interested too. The few times I have brought it up it has not gone well.

I think we’re all struggling with this issue in our Zity kink-verse. First, you have to locate people in your city who are like minded when it comes to fetishes. Then comes the equally hard task of getting a few to meet with you. I’ll bet everyone is nervous about this part!

I would love to meet up with some diaper and/or spanking enthusiasts here in Montreal, but we all have to overcome our fears, myself included.

Maybe with spring coming it will be easier, as that is when Montreal tends to swing into high gear. We’ll see!

Now you have the added factor of coronavirus - and how long before that recedes and it is safe to interact with other people. Even if you found a willing or interested partner - would you be willing to risk getting sick? Personally, I would be very hesitant to hook up with anyone until the health department puts a nail in the pandemic coffin!!

Once this pandemic has subsided you might try delving into a local dungeon. I'm pretty sure there are some where you are located. Once you get into their circle I think it will be much easier. It is possible to connect at zity but in this case I think you will be more successful going that route.

@Moppys_jalopy is right. Montreal has a very active BDSM/fetish community. Just google BDSM (or Fetish) Community in Montreal.

Look for a strongly independent, self confidant, woman. One who is a " Sidewalk Superintendent" telling others what to do. Oh and in love with you.

As I previously stated she was CRAZY about me after our 1st date, something that I did not know till many years later!

I am very shy. So I have to get over my shyness first. But I would love to have a girlfriend to spank. I also like for her to spank me.

I noticed your information is very limited. Perhaps list your city or geographic area and further information in your profile.

Not sure but Rufus's original post was on 2-9-20. Just when the pandemic was becoming every persons fear of death. So he was not looking at the best of times. And I did not see any other post from him as to whether or not he has found someone to give him what he is looking for.

But I can say I have looked at personal ads here on Zity and there are many ads looking for spankings, enemas, med fet and a few more things from many people. And a large number of those ads were placed a long time ago and people have not been back online in years or the ad placer does not look here any longer.

So this brings me back to the same old question, How many people are real, how many people join and then gone and do not come back?

And why are people still afraid to meet. I asked someone, the screen name and profile appeared to be female where do you live? the response was that is way to personal to say. How many people are here on Zity actively? and how many profiles are listed and people have not been on line for YEARS?

Times are changing. The days of the old chat rooms are gone. People sharing interests with each other is gone. Telling someone where you live, what country? State? isn't going to happen? If this is what is happening then we have more to worry about besides Covid-19.

P.S. even if info in profile is limited , say hello and see if you get a response, then ask a question.

June M. Reinisch, Ph.D. with Ruth Beasley, M.L.S (1990). Kinsey Institute New Report on Sex, St. Martin's Press: pg. 162-163.

49% of the men and 38% of the women have spanked or have been spanked as part of sex.

It seems more men are being spanked than women.

As for me I think is depends on what you are looking for a spanking companion or a life long partner. I have found my life long partner my husband in high school. I guess I am one of the lucky ones that both of us are into domestic discipline.

I also believe if we look hard enough we should be able to find what we want. The phrase a bird of the feather flock together is true you need to look at the right place or crowd you will find one.

Just don’t set your standards too high and find someone that you are comfortable and able to relate and communicate.

There is no perfection in any relationship there will be high and low points.