For Older DLs and ABs - married or in a LTR

With my first wife, I dumped my fetishism on her after we got married. We lasted 4 years. I "broke it" to my second wife, a RN, after we got married. I lied at first, about bedwetting and incon issues. She accepted it, was concerned, and even got into diaper play when I finally 'fessed up. But, it ended after 15 years, she said I loved my diapers more than her, and she used my DLism against me in the divorce. Wife number three, IS my wife, with full knowledge of my leanings. It was either that or we go our own separate ways before anything got started, now, nearly two years ago. With me, 53, and her, 46, and her very "vanilla", she doesn't understand things but accepts them, and says it's MY thing.

Has anyone a little older, married or in a LTR, been able to eventually bring their partner to acceptance and, perhaps, participation, giving hope to those who feel very alone and that there is no chance they will ever find an acceptant partner, and have to indulge themselves alone or continue to hide what they enjoy forever?

Did you do anything special to have your partner meet your needs? Did you have to compromise and offer to meet something special to THEM in trade?

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THE MORE OPEN WE ARE, THE MORE ACCEPTED WE'LL BE!

This is a very tough subject for any married AB/DL.I am very lucky with my current love and even my ex wife was not so bad.I have heard some real horror stories of divorces were the ex wife has brought this out in court and literally distroyed an individual's career and friend base.Even in one case a video of the man playing baby all done up in his diapers.Be open,but be careful of who with .Honesty is allways the best.Be very attentive to the other's sexual needs first and foremost.Horney wife not being loved and care for and your out humping your diapers is a recipe for disaster.

My first wife was not interested in anything out of the norm. I am an enema lover. I have been all my life. I brought it up a couple of times and she just brushed it off. Not a bit interested. I had to indulge myself when I was alone.

After we divorced, and I got my life back together, I met the woman I'm married to now. I brought up the subject of my liking enemas and she was ready to try one right then. This was great. She was the first person that I had ever given one too.

I had never thought of wearing diapers. I don't know why I even thought of it. I guess I seen it on the internet and thought it would be kind of fun. I told my wife about it and she thought I was a little crazy. I bought some and we both tried them. We both wear them sometime. She has no problem with it. She doesn't like them as much as I do but she doesn't care if I wear them. I'm 60 and she is 59.

Tony and I have only been Married for almost 5 years. He will be 61 and I will be 52 soon. We first met as Mommy/Baby. He is the third child I wasn't able to conceive. Then we got to know each other's adult sides and fell very much in love. Tony was born with moderate spina bifeda and also has MS. So he has never in his life been out of diapers. Diapers are not what makes the person they are just another form of underware.

People need to be honest with each other as soon as they feel they are beginning a relationship. Relationships need to be open and honest. Those that can not accept us for who we are never really has accepted us any way. If someone truly loves you, they love all of you.

Just my opinion 😃

My wife accepted it as something that added excitement to our sex lives. She would do many things and let me live my fantasies occasionally. But as we got older she got more against them and by the time we split up, she had not "played" with me in them for a couple of years.

The split was unrelated to the diapers.

My wife of 30+ years accepted my diaper desires and plays with me in my diapers, sews my diapers, picks out diaper fabric she likes to see me in, lays out my diapers in bed under covers so when pull back covers waalaa there they are ready for action. as far as anything special I do for her, just be there for her in every way, help out with household endeavors, etc. and keep her satisfied in normal wife/husband methods. no compromises needed in our relationship

[quote author=tom49461 link=topic=2197.msg17846#msg17846 date=1210480800]

With my first wife, I dumped my fetishism on her after we got married. We lasted 4 years. I "broke it" to my second wife, a RN, after we got married. I lied at first, about bedwetting and incon issues. She accepted it, was concerned, and even got into diaper play when I finally 'fessed up. But, it ended after 15 years, she said I loved my diapers more than her, and she used my DLism against me in the divorce. Wife number three, IS my wife, with full knowledge of my leanings. It was either that or we go our own separate ways before anything got started, now, nearly two years ago. With me, 53, and her, 46, and her very "vanilla", she doesn't understand things but accepts them, and says it's MY thing.

What do you mean she is very vanilla? I've seen people said that before, but I don't know what they mean by it

I'm on my second marrage. The first lasted 5 years, the second has lasted 27 and is still going strong. I didn't tell my first wife until after we were married, my second I told before my marrage. Moral of story...tell you fiance and give her/him the choice.

As far as age and relationship. I'm 61 (gad that is hard to say) and my wife is 59. Sex for my wife at 59 is not nearly as important to her as it is me. She likes me in diapers I believe because she knows that a)I'm happy while I'm in them and B) she has never had to worry about me cheating not that I ever would have. I do my thing with my diapers. I wear them at night or day and I wet them when i want to. My wife doesn't have any desire to wear but enjoys having sex with me in one when she finally gets horny (which does happen ever couple of months). In the interim she makes sure that I'm taking care of by masterbating me every couple of weeks. So, we are happy which is important if a relationship is to last. "we" have to be happy, not just me.

I too have been married before and I'm now in my third LTM, of 15 years. I didn't tell the first one of my love for diapers or cross dressing until well into the first yr. She didn't freak out but it did eventually become a problem. With the second I told her I like to dress up in womens cloths but Ididn't tell her about the diapers. I thought it was too much to tell one person all of it. Well she did fiend out later and had no problem with it just really wanted no part of it. We split up and I spent the next year by myself. It was then that I thought real hard about wearing diapers and dresses. I finally was able to answer the question they all asked (WHY)

I believe that when you know why you like diapers you are better able to explain to some one what it is you drive out of wearing diapers. Yes I know it is the feel the look ,sent, sound, the worm pee running through your diapers that does it for you. But what you really need to figure out is ' what emotional need the diaper is satisfying.

When you can explain this you will give your SO a chance to better understand you and I am sure this will enable them to participate. I think that if the person loves you they would want to help fill your needs and be part of of your life.

I did this with my SO at the start of our relationship and she understands and is involved with my diaper and cross dressing fetishes. She and I love each other and this is a part of what we do for one another.

Give this some thought and then give it a try. Good luck and best wishes.

I have been married once. it was not the reason for the divorce. she knew all the time about me wearing diapers.

also my second wife does not feel its wrong, we love each other as we are.

This seems like a strange subject but is very real to many of us. I was married for over 30 years and developed need to control my constent wetting because of years of type I diabetes. I had to wear some kind of protection, so I wore a catheter and leg bag for a long period. I kept getting sores and blisters on my pee pee. My wife didn't like the catheters and, for that matter, I didn't like them either. While on a trip I developed such a bad blister on the end of my pee pee, that a diaper was the only choice. I dumped the catheters and have been in diapers ever since. About ten years now. My loving wife passed away almost 10 years ago and my life has really changed!!! I knew that I was gay so I decided to come out and quit living a lie, about everything. I am now VERY out of the closet and have lived with my lover for three years now. Right from the start, my partner was made aware of my need, and love for diapers. The thing that has probably helped us most is that he is a female impressionist and full accepts me as both a DL and an AB. I full accept his liking to dress as a female and entertain and he accepts me as I am. The moral of all our stores seems to be that telling UP FRONT, IS the right thing to do. The other strange part of my story, is that there is over 35 years difference in me and my partners ages! I am 65 years old, and feel like a kid, being with loving partner that is only 27. Last night before he started playing a computer game with his brother, on line, He diapered me in cloth diapers and plastic panties, and got me into my blanket sleeper, clipped a binkie on it and put me to bed with my juice in a baby bottle. How is that for a couple. ??? We love each other very much just as we are. :😃

We are both in our early 50's and have been married for 30 years. We just started DL play a few years ago, on a whim.

She wanted me to tell her "naughty stories" during sex, which was not unusual, but to my surprise I blurted out my interest in seeing her diapered. I had been looking at DL pics on WetSet, and was finding them very erotic.

She seemed to like the idea, and then brought it up a few times herself during sex. I bought some diapers a few months later, met with instant approval, and we have both been occasionally diapered for foreplay ever since.

Was totally not a big deal, just a lot of fun.

A lot of sad stories and difficult times listed above. Sometimes it just goes very easily!

I guess you could say we are LTR.

I have beeen married to a wonderful woman for 35 years. Yes she knew from the start I wore diapers. She had to remove them to shave me for my last operation. She was the night nurse at the hospital where I was being treated.

I had been depressed and was trying to hide from everyone. I was working midnights to avoid people.

In fact it was both of us working midnights that got us together.

After I recovered I went back to the hospital and waited for her to come off duty and offered to buy her breakfast for being so nice to me.

We just hit it off and a year later we married. To say she brought me out of my shell would be a understatement. She accepted my diapers as a part of who I was.

About three years ago after all the kids were married and out of the house she told me she missed having kids.

I told her that she had always had a big baby. She looked at me and smiled and asked if I would be her baby. How could I tell her no?

Now she treats me more like a baby and we have both have found it has spiced things up.