By: A

So my story covers my experience in and with diapers until now (18 years old).

The first part of this story gives the reader an idea of how I ended up in diapers, the middle is about diapering events in my life due to my choosing to when offered, and the last is about my private experiences in my own, self-bought diapers.

It starts when I was being potty trained when I turned 2.5. It took me a long time (until 4) to end up using the toilet full time (mostly due to me not bothering to use the toilet). I could usually tell them when I had to go before 2.5 but before the age of 2.5 they always had me use the diaper as it was just easier for everyone and because I showed no interest in the potty. Within a few weeks I was using the toilet about half time but was still using my diaper a lot. (My parents kept me in baby diapers instead of training pants until I was about 3 for reasons you will learn). I do not know how many of my diaper uses were accidents but I do know many of them were not as before the training process I often told my parents I needed to go. I do however know that I did, poop in my diaper a lot even though only about 5%-10% of these were accidents and I could have gotten to the toilet on time. My parents have told me that I didn't seem to care if I pooped my diaper or not because they say that often when they asked me if I had an accident I would say "no I didn't want to use the potty". My parents have never scolded of spanked me for my accidents or training habits as they believed that I would use the toilet when ready. Also they knew some of my wettings and messings were genuine accidents and yelling at me for not using the toilet would make me feel like I did something wrong when I had an accident. By 3-3.5 I apparently decided to stop my messing "accidents" as I went from about 4 messy diapers a week to about 3 a month in less then a month's time. Since I still wet a lot (about 50% of the time I had to pee at the age of 3) in the diaper they kept me in diapers for another six months. I think that only about 10%- 25% of these wettings were genuine accidents but I know a bunch were as my parents told me that sometimes when I wet I would do the "pee dance" just before I wet. I am also told that it is only after they saw me doing this dance thing that I asked to be changed (I guess I felt too strange being in something I wet without intending to). Most of the time I just waited until one of them checked me to be changed (if I wet because I didn't want to use the toilet I would stay in the wet or messy diaper for a long time). A little after 3.5 I was switched pull ups (the only diapering choice they ever made without my consent) and my parents started to bribe me to use the toilet more. They knew by now that at least 80-90% of my wettings and 100% of my messings were by choice (I was still wetting most days and at least once each day). They know most were fully controllable but refused to punish me for wetting because since some were accidents it would be wrong to punish me because they would be punishing me for having an accident. This bribing helped a lot (I loved to stay up a little late and watch TV) because within 6 week I was only wetting about 2 times a week and within a 16 I never wet more then once a week. At this point (3 years and 9 months) I was given the choice to not wear pull-ups anymore but I chose to "for when I have an accident." From here until I turned 4 I occasionally used my pull-up but at 4 I seemed to have few accidents (what is normal for a 4 year old) it was highly recommended by my parents that I stop wearing them full time (but we still had most of a case remaining (used later). I agreed.

During this whole time I still wore diapers to bed (not pull-ups as I wet way too much at night). Because I wore diapers to bed I was unable to use the toilet if I awoke having to go, as I would need parents to put diaper back on. Because of this if I had to use diaper even to poop if I awoke but if I wanted a change I just had wake to parents and they would change me no matter what. One time (this is one of the first things I remember from this early (the rest are what my parents told me)) I went to bed with my stomach going crazy and shortly after my parents went to bed (they would take diaper off if still up) I really had to go poop badly. I could tell it was going to be a big messy diarrhea and I didn't want to go in diaper so I tore it off and used toilet. This was normally fine as long I went to get a replacement but I was tired and apparently didn't think and just went back to bed naked. Well apparently this diarrhea was not I one shot deal as I awoke early in the morning in a bed soaking with warm urine (accident had just happened) and the covers and I were covered in shit. My parents were furious, not because of the accident but because I had not gone to get a new diaper.

After that I always went to get a new diaper if I awoke wet or had to poop at night. Because I sometimes got a new diaper partway through the night I would awake dry. When this happened I would just go back to sleep but if the diaper was still clean when I woke up I would just stay in my diaper and PJs all morning (my parents didn't care until it was time to change out of pjs for the day). As you probably guessed these usually ended up wet and on about 5 occasions soiled. My parents were not happy when they found my diaper soiled after I had woken up, as I had not had an accident. They didn't know (or just didn't say anything) if I wet my diaper in the mornings as I usually changed myself and just throw the wet diaper in the trash. They did have to change me when I soiled my diaper and that they did not like. I just told them I couldn't get the diaper off fast enough and the poop was an emergency. By 5.5-6 I was dry through the night and stopped wearing diapers to bed. I was now diaper-free.

(The above information is based mostly off fact (what my parents told me and what I remember) with just a little speculation. Just to clarify I do have vague memories of deciding to use diapers when I didn't need to and definitely remember of wearing to bed and having to poop the diaper and get changed in the middle of the night.

My next experience with diapers came at the approximate age of 6(sometime when my younger brother (15 months younger) was in pull-ups because he wet the bed till he was 7, and I was not). This is the only experience I remember and the only one my parents remember in which I wore my brother's diapers. My mom had a bunch of friends over and they were sitting on the porch.

Around noon I was in his room and decided to put on one of his pull-ups so I stripped down and put it on and just began walking around the house in nothing but a pull-up. My mom had some friends over and her friends saw me and she asked why I was in a pull-up. I shrugged and she just said don't use it. I told her I wouldn't. After lunch I went back upstairs and played with my brother in the TV room and by this time had pants on over the pull-up. We were having lots of fun doing something and I had to go the bathroom and take a pee and a poop. The movie was really good and I had not seen it before. I didn't want to miss any of it and I just used the pull-up. It's not like I tried to hold it until the end and just burst when I couldn't hold it anymore I just wet and messed when I had to go. It was wet and messy (but didn't smell of poo at all) but the movie was good. A little while latter mom came. Apparently my pull-up had leaked a lot (I had not even bothered to check) as my mom noticed my pants were wet and asked me if I had an accident. I said no I just didn't want to get up from the movie and she took me to help me clean up. She helped me out of my pants and got a little angry when she saw the pull-up had been used (she thought I had taken it off). She told me to lie down and tore open the sides. When she saw I had pooped too she got irritated and walked out of the room for a min and came back with wipes and a diaper from when my bro needed them. I fought it a bit but knew I could not win, as when my mom had an idea it was impossible to change her mind. She diapered me and told me that if I wanted to not use the toilet then I would have to wear diapers for a while and that I couldn't use the toilet. For 24 hours I was diapered but used the toilet when she wasn't looking.

The above only happened once and is for sure 100% true as I remember all that and so do my parents.

This next bit happed sometime when I was 7. We were in this nice hotel somewhere in Europe (might have been England). One night I awoke around 11 with a very, very urgent need to shit. I very quickly got out of bed and ran to the toilet but before I got there I lost control a bit in my pants (diarrhea). I got to the toilet, pulled down my soiled pjs and finished in the toilet while crying about my pants. My parents heard me and came in. They were very nice about it and soothed me and made me feel ok about what had happened. They helped me clean myself, gave me new pjs, and I went back to sleep. Less then an hour latter I awoke again needing to go and again the same thing happened only this time messed a lot. This time my mom nicely asked if I wanted to wear a diaper so I would not mess my pants and so I could sleep better. I declined (really didn't want to) saying diapers were for babies and I don't want my brothers (1 was 1.5 years younger and the other 7 years older!) to know as they would see me when we got up. Well I again awoke for the 3rd time and again didn't make it and even wet myself while running. Again my parents came in and my mom said I needed to wear a diaper so I wouldn't wet or poop my last pair of pjs. I said fine but was not happy about it. My parents called the front desk of the hotel and asked if they had any diapers they could send up. Luckily they did and my mom ordered a package of the largest baby diaper they had and within 10 min I was comfortably diapered in a thick soft diaper and back in bed. As you guessed I again had to go and again didn't make it but this time, because of the diaper I was unable to use the toilet at all as I couldn't get it off fast enough without making a mess out of what was already in the diaper. I ended up uncontrollably peeing and shitting everything into the diaper. I just went to my parents' room (connecting rooms) and told mom I couldn't get the diaper off in time and had used it. My mom asked me if I needed to go more and I said I still needed to pee. She said that since the diaper was already used I could just go. I peed and pooped a little more but not all I had to. Again I went back to bed in a fresh diaper and it was now about 3AM. About an hour latter I awoke again for the fifth time and could tell I had wet and shit a little while asleep (likely due to the fact I didn't let everything out last time). I really had to go and since I had to go in the diaper anyway (mom told me not to take it off myself if it was used at all as I would make a mess) I just went right there in bed. When I awoke again a bit later I just went and now the diaper was overfilled with the liquid shit and urine it had absorbed but I went back to sleep until my mom came in 30-40 min latter and brought me into her room. She asked my why I was sleeping in a messy diaper. I told her I was so tired I didn't care and that there was no big difference, as I would have had to use the diaper anyway. She told me I should have gotten up anyway as my diaper had leaked a lot of urine in my bed. She changed me and I asked her to leave me in a diaper for the day in case it happened again. She told me they shouldn't but I said since we will be walking around London all day I do not want to take any chances of embarrassing myself in public but I really just wanted to be able to wet my diaper more. She said okay but told me to use the toilet if I had to go and I should only have an accident in the diaper. I kept the diaper on all day and wet as much as I could while walking around. Towards the end of they day I said I had to go pee and just dumped the wet diaper in the trash and I had decided I didn't need it. I got her to let me wear a diaper that night as I was out of pjs and just used it when I awoke having to pee. I could have easily made it to the toilet but just told myself that the diaper would take care of it if I wet and went back to sleep without going and wet sometime latter in my sleep. In the morning I disposed of it myself and didn't wear one again. We also never spoke of it again but I wish I had accepted that diaper the first time.

Although the above might not seem true it actually did happen to me. I really did have that many uncontrolled bowel movements that night and never had any like it again.

This encounter with diapers was when I was 9 but my younger bro was still 7. We were going to Disneyland and someone had suggested that my mom try to get my bro to wear diapers, as he might not be able to make it through some of the lines without having to give up his place to go to the bathroom. My mom liked this idea and tried to get him to wear them. He said he shouldn't have to if I didn't because in his mind we were so close in age that whatever privilege one got the other should get too but I could go much longer then him without using the bathroom so was told I didn't need them. My mom then asked me if I would be willing to wear them so that we wouldn't have to leave any lines after a few hours because of my bro. I wanted to go on all the rides and when she told me many older kids wear them for that reason I agreed I would if my bro would. I was reluctant to but I did it anyway. In Disneyland we were both diapered during the days at the park. On the first day after 1 hour of waiting in one of the lines after lunch (we both drank a lot at lunch) my bro started to complain of having to pee and my mom kept whispering to him to use his diaper quietly so no one would have to know as we were not leaving the line. He kept complaining about it and after about 20 min of him dancing around he wet his diaper beyond his control. I on the other hand almost made it through the line but suddenly had an urge to go. After holding it quietly for about 10 min to see if I could make it I decided to just wet. After the ride mom told my bro she would change him and looked very surprised when I told her I was also wet and said it was a good thing I had agreed. Through the rest of that day I started to realize that I liked the feel and comfort of the baby diapers and was trying to figure this out. When we got back to the hotel before dinner Scott took his diaper off right away but I, finding it was so comfortable, kept it on (it was still unused). Because we were wearing baggy pants for the whole vacation (so others might not notice our diapers) my mom didn't know I never took off my diaper. During dinner I had to go pee and I decided that I would just wet my diaper. When we were going back to the hotel I said I really had to go and ran into the bathroom in the lobby where I dumped my diaper in the trash. Anyway, mom diapered us again for they day in the park. This day in the park was much like the last only this time I wet both in the morning and afternoon (I got changed at lunch) but not so much out of need as out of this strange joy I got from it. I was drinking lots of water because it was very hot and so I could wet more. My mom noticed the extra drinking so expected me to have to wet more and didn't wonder about it at all. That night I secretly took one of the diapers and wore it to bed. I awoke in the night having to pee and just let it go. The warmth felt so good that I tried to pee as much as possible to get the warmth to spread. In the morning there was a small wet spot on the bed but no one ever knew about it and I just through the diaper out the window. The vacation went on like this for another 2 days and ended uneventfully.

Well after this trip I wanted to wear diapers again but couldn't till late 15. There are however a few incidences.

Well at ten I went to a sleepover at this kids house I had been to several times before (he has a 7 year old brother who also has a friend every time I am there). We always change in the closet or the bathroom one at a time. I never picked up on this till the next morning but the kid's brother always changes in the closet. Well the night passed without incident and the next morning the kids brother was being annoying so my friend decided to embarrass him. He showed me a bag of Goodnite diapers in the closet they were his brothers. I was very kind to his brother about it (I don't make fun of people for this) but wished I had been show this the night before as I might have changed in the closet and taken one. Unfortunately the next time the brother had a separate room and I couldn't sneak through it for his Goodnites.

The next time is when I was 13. I had not wet the bed for about 5 years now (not counting all the diapers at Disneyland). I was in my own house but woke up at night and couldn't figure out why I had woken up so I just rolled over and tried to fall back to sleep. After about 10 min I get this strange feeling, which lasted about 45 sec to a min. I as soon as this feeling started I tried to figure out what was causing it. I rolled over I shifted the blankets but it continued. About 15 seconds into it I felt the wetness and figured out I was wetting the bed while half awake and without even realizing it even while it was flowing. I knew it was too late and didn't even think to try and stop the rest. I didn't want anyone to know and if I got out of the bed my bro would realize, as he was about 4 feet away. I rolled over and started wishing more for diapers as I fell asleep. I remember thinking I could use this as a bedwetting accident and try and get my mom to buy them because she might. I finally fell asleep while the pee was still nice and warm and it was so nice. That night I had several different dreams involving me getting diapers in different ways (the world wore them, I was a bed wetter and wore them, I wore them 24/7, I stole a friends and was using them at the sleepover and just pissing myself and bed). When I woke in the morning the pee in the bed was still warm in some places and cold in others so I must have wet more in the night with each dream.

Anyway, my mom found out the bed was wet when she went to make it and asked me about it. I just said I had an accident and she said ok then don't worry about it and let me know if it happens again and we will do something about it. I asked her if I needed diapers in case it happened again and she said not yet but if it happened again she would take me to the doctor and get me diapers so I wouldn't wake in a wet bed. Unfortunately I could never work up the courage to wet again as I didn't want the doctor until 2 years latter when I was sure it would be to late to start wetting the bed.

Luckily by then I could go buy them myself and since then have wear them to bed whenever I can and just drink lots of water so I will have to wake up and wet them and the warmth is so nice and in the morning it is still warm from being trapped against the heat of my body and I again just lie in bed and let the pee flow into the Goodnite. Often by morning it is so wet that if I sit on it I feel the pee squeezing out and flowing around the diaper and sometime out and around my pant legs. Every now and then the GN leaks a little at night in bed (never let it leak in bed a lot) so now my mattress pad has some yellow spots.

One time when I was feeling very cozy in bed I pooped in my diaper a little. It was soft and even the small amount spread around my but a bit. I just went to sleep but I will never do it again as it was too messy.