The letter went on to inform her that in line with the national screening programme it was the university health service's policy to "offer" a cervical smear to all female students. It then went on to inform her sternly about the risks posed by cervical cancer and the importance of catching it early.

Moderating its tone slightly, the letter went on to say that the test would be performed by the nurse, was painless and would only take five minutes. This was at least slightly reassuring, as the "horror story" faction (see part 1 above) were full of tales of agony and humiliation at the hands of male doctors.

Finally it said that the test was also an opportunity to discuss sexual health and contraception. Cynically, Clare couldn't help thinking that the screening programme was to some extent a trojan horse allowing the authorities to ensure that the newbies didn't cause a rampant outbreak of STDs and unwanted pregnancies across campus.

Anyway, she was late for a lecture so she shoved the letter in her pocket to think about later.