Relaxing my muscles, I let him press my legs out to the sides. I have to fight my instincts to slam them back together before he can see anything. “That wasn’t so hard, was it? You don’t need to be so tense. Just relax. There’s nothing for you to do but lay there and let me work.” Shifting my eyes from where I’ve been glaring at the ceiling, I look down to see him right up between my legs, scrutinizing an area that hasn’t seen much attention as of late. “I’m trying, but it’s not that easy.” At my words, he looks up and makes eye contact. I panic and squeeze my eyes shut. “Just because you can’t see me, doesn’t mean I can’t see you. As long as you don’t try to close you legs and stick with closing your eyes though, do whatever you have to. You’ll feel me touch you now.”

His hands touch the inside of my thighs, and I shiver. He moves his right thumb in a small circle on the inside of my upper leg. “It’s really going to be ok. Do you want me to narrate as I work, or just do it and keep it a surprise?” My eyes pop open. I find myself glaring at him again, not for the first time today, and probably not the last either. “Surprises are good. This… well this is not a surprise. More like a sneak attack. I need to know what to expect, but I don’t really want details.” His eyes meet mine and he nods. “Ok then. First I’m going to visually and manually examine the area for any bumps, rashes, or sores. Do you have anything you should tell me? Any itchy or sore areas? Any weird discharge or pus?”

As his fingers start to press and feel around my vulva, I huff. “Did you just ask me if I have pus? Down there? What kind of girl do you take me for?” He looks up long enough to roll his eyes before sliding his thumbs into the top of my slit. He works his way down, massaging my labia between his thumbs and fingers. “Are you asking if I think you’re promiscuous or have questionable taste in music?” He smirks and I frown, both at the question and because I didn’t really expect him to catch the reference. “It’s a standard question for this part of the exam. Basically I want to know if you have any symptoms to tell me about. I find with difficult patients, if I don’t ask specifically about each symptom, they say no so I list as many as I can. So, do you have anything to tell me about?” I sigh, closing my eyes again and shake my head. His fingers are just at the bottom of my labia and he squeezes harder. I squeal, moving my hips a bit. “Ouch! What was that for?”

He moves his thumbs back up until they’re resting along either side of my inner labia and presses them apart, spreading me open. “Is shaking your head a proper means of answering questions? Do I ask things I don’t want an answer to?” His thumbs press even more firmly, baring every little detail of me to his eyes. “No sir, “ I sass, rolling my eyes at him. He growls. “You’re drawing things out, and it would serve you well to remember who is in the position of power here.” I shiver, and it’s not just intimidation and irritation. “Fine. No, I have no pus or rashes or scabs. I have no diseases or… or… or conditions to report.” He looks up at me and cocks his head, raising his eyebrow. “How can you be positive? Even if you’re careful, things happen.” This sounds less judgmental than what I expect from him, but it doesn’t really matter. I shrug, sighing as the tips of his thumbs slide up to move my clitoral hood. It catches me off guard and I squirm. “After I caught my last boyfriend cheating a couple of years ago, I got tested. A few months later I got retested just to be sure. I’m clean.”

His hands shift, so the thumb and fingers of his left hand keep my spread, and his right index finger starts to press around the edges of my clitoral area. “Just because you were clean a couple of years ago doesn’t mean you’re still clean. This might be a little uncomfortable.” He picks up a swab and starts to poke at my clitoris. My hips fly up in the air and my legs start to close. “Stop.” At his firm, deep voiced command, I freeze. “If you can’t hold still, we’re going to have real problems. I need to know that you won’t move during my exam.” He looks up toward my face and I scowl at him. “Maybe if you had warned me, I could control my natural reactions. Did you really think poking me there would be met without a reaction?” He sighs and shrugs his shoulders. “Ok, fine. I could have given you a better heads up than I did. And maybe you can get better at just answering the questions I ask, when I ask them.” Rolling my eyes, I settle back down in my assigned position. “Ok, fine, whatever. I haven’t been with anyone since I was last tested. Therefore I’m still clean, right?” His eyes open extra wide, seeming to mock me. “Well then, I guess I don’t have to ask if you’re sexually active, or about your sexual habits. Whatever will we talk about to fill the gap?” Biting my bottom lip, I clench my hands into fists. “There’s no reason to be rude or demeaning just because I don’t sleep with just any dick that comes along.”

“Ok then, you’re picky about dicks.” As he says this mockingly, he reaches over and slips the swab he was using to probe me in a tube on the tray. He releases my spread labia and moves his fingers down to spread me lower. He leans in to look at something closely and I try to hold still, while I can almost feel his eyes on me. “So how long has it been burning while you urinate?” He looks directly in my eyes and waits. “I… it doesn’t. What are you asking me that?” I feel my face flush and avert my eyes to look over his shoulder at the wall behind him. “Your urethra, the hole you urinate from, is red and inflamed. You are almost certainly having some difficulty relieving yourself and probably experiencing discomfort simultaneously. I can see it, so just tell me.” Discretely I try to squirm without being noticed, hoping it helps dissipate my mounting worry. “It just started to be a little uncomfortable this morning. I was going to mention it to MY doctor, but obviously I ended up here and rather distracted by all of the change. I forgot all about it.” It feels like he spreads me further, if that’s even possible. He reaches for something out of my sight before looking right at me.

“I need you to hold very still. I’m giving you fair warning that this will probably be uncomfortable but you can’t move. You can be a good girl, right?” Just as he finishes his condescending question, I feel something rough, scratchy and way too big push up into my tiny hole. I hiss and grab onto the sides of the table, struggling to hold still. “Ouch, fuck, take it out! It’s too big!” If anything he pushes it in deeper as tears start to leak from the corners of my eyes. “Just a little more for this one, then we can get one more and be done.” He withdraws the intruder from me and turns to place it in it’s spot on the tray, swapping it for the new one. The relief is so great that I don’t fully register what he said until the second swab is in position and starting to push inside. “Just one more, hold still again and this will be over soon. This one needs to go a bit deeper in and stay in a little longer. It’s important to find out what exactly is causing this inflammation.” Whimpering, I squeeze my eyes shut as he crams the second hard dry swab into my sore and sensitive little hole. “Ow, ow, ow, ow, ow! I am never coming to the doctor again.” I whisper aloud to myself, willing that little thoughtful hope to help me keep my shit together. It’s all I can do not to yell and cuss out Dr. Max, and then I hear him chuckle.

“Go ahead, it’s nothing I haven’t heard before.” I look up and give him my dirtiest look. He raises his eyebrow, then turns towards his tray of evil implements and starts messing with something making a crinkly sound. “Wait, what? What have you heard before? Are we done yet? This whole… ordeal… has already gone on much longer than I anticipated.” He turns back toward my spread crotch.”You wanted to cuss me out. You wouldn’t be the first. Or the second. You’re going to feel me touch you with a wipe. It won’t hurt, but it will feel cold.” I shiver as I feel something cold and moist slither across my bared inner flesh. “How did you know what I wanted to say though? Should I assume you bring out these urges in women on a regular basis then?” The fingers of his left hand spread me wide at my tiny little urethra again and I tense. “I have no idea what, if any, urges I elicit. Relax or you’ll make this even more uncomfortable. You’re going to feel pressure and probably some mild pain as I slide in the catheter. I want to get that urine sample now, and I don’t think you’ll be able to produce one on your own. I’m going to have a nurse run these samples up to the lab as soon as I’m done so that we can hopefully have preliminary results before you go.”

As he finishes his explanation, he starts to push the catheter in. I yelp and try to hold still but I scoot back a little before stopping. Holding the catheter in place with one hand, his other hand reaches under my thigh and grips my hip. “You. Can. Not. Move. Right. Now.” It’s his turn to glare at me and I feel tears running down my cheeks again. “Almost in, don’t move.” I feel a very weird sensation then a strong urge to pee. “Ok, it’s in. You really have to stop fussing like someone is trying to kill you. This is very important to your health. Do you not care about that?” I sniffle, trying to hold back and more tears. He’s moving around between my legs, and I hear liquid trickle into a dish. “Of course I care. That doesn’t mean I enjoy being tormented. When I woke up this morning, none of this was on my radar. It’s all been a bit of a shock.” He screws the lid on a urine specimen cup and sets it next to the tubes with the swabs. “I’m going to remove this,” he starts to tug on the catheter, “and then you can relax for a minute while I take this out to a nurse to run to the lab.” He pulls the tube the rest of the way out of me and while it feels very unusual, it doesn’t sting like it did going in. He stands up and pulls his gloves off. “I’ll be back in a few minutes.” He grabs the small tray with the samples and walks out the door. I sigh and close my eyes, enjoying the small break and few minutes of peace.

Feeling something touch my inner thigh, I sit bolt upright. “Wha… what… what’s going on?” Opening my eyes I look around and see Dr. Max standing there, his hand gently resting on my leg. “You dozed off when I left the room for a minute. I let you rest while I got stuff ready for the next phase of the exam, but I need you to lay back so we can get back to it.” Sighing and shaking my head, I lower back to the table and shift around, trying to get comfortable, or as close as possible. “Are we almost done? I feel like I’ve been here for hours.” Sitting back on his stool and scooting up close to my bottom, he shakes his head. “We’ve been in here for about an hour so far. I’d say we’re about half way done. Maybe going forward you’ll come in regularly and won’t have to do a decades worth of examining in one day. Speaking of, next we’re going to do a thorough internal exam.”