Chapter 10

Since my first jerk-off session to a climax happened at age 13 while in wet diapers and a wet bed, I would often later try to repeat that first experience. When I was 14 years old, and after having pretty much outgrown accidental bedwetting, I can remember some pretty slippery situations that developed during my masturbation sessions. First, I would put on I at least 6 to 10 pairs of regular underpants over top each other to try and simulate the thickness of the special night pants I had worn only a couple of years before. Then I would use a plastic trash bag and step into it to create leg openings. The trash bag would be pulled up over top the thick padded underpants to create a waterproof homemade rubber pant!

Then came the fun part. I would fill several water balloons up with warm water and slip them between my skin and the thick padding of the homemade night pants. I would lay down on the bed and slip my hand inside my underpants to prick small holes in the water balloons. I was always so very excited during these jerk-off sessions and while the warm water from the balloons leaked into my padded underpants, I acted like I was asleep and was actually bedwetting again. My young manhood was always so firm and erect during these times, and the sensations I got as I rocked back and forth against the plastic sheeted mattress were incredible!

As a chronic bedwetter from 8 to 13 year old, it was always a common occurrence for me to wake up to wet sheets, wet underpants, and with a wet T-shirt on. Even when I would do as my mom instructed and wore my padded night pants with a pair of rubber pants, the waterproof pants would often times leak at the leg and waist openings leaving me in an extremely wet bed. I was a heavy nighttime wetter so I'm sure this was to be expected.

Anyway, when I later discovered the water balloon trick at age 14, I actually liked it when my homemade rubber pants would leak and my bedsheets would become soaked as well. Sometimes after the bed was soaked, I would fill more balloons and prick them with holes just to make the bed even more wet. Sometimes it was very close to becoming a swimming pool.

Masturbating on wet sheets and with thick padded cloth underpants on was not at all unusual to me and it actually made me feel like I was once again a "naughty bed-wetting" boy! The warm wet sheets and soft cloth underpants provided a very firm teenage erection with the necessary lubrication for some real slippery fun! I would rock back and forth against the mattress with my hard young boyhood through the homemade bedwetter and rubber pants and against the mattress until I would final cum to a momentous climax! Its no wonder I developed these strong fetishes for diapers, plastic pants, and bedwetting today as even as early as age 13 I was being so positively reinforced with pleasure each and every orgasm that was to follow.

Somewhere early on in this experimentation, I introduced a leather belt into this play time. After the water balloons leaked, I would pull my pants down to my knees, and while laying stomach down on the bed, would reach behind with the belt to give myself much deserved "Bedwetter Spankings!" Can you imagine a 14 year old actually having to spank himself since there was no one else would do it for him? I really wished I could have been spanked by someone else at the time. Even at the age of 14, I still very much felt the shame from my bedwetting years and desired to be humiliated, spanked, and punished for it!

Chapter 11

My next experience into this new scene was very embarrassing and happened at age 14. I was really beginning to have strong desires to find "DIAPER PANTS" made for big boys. I wanted to find a pair of thickly padded 100% cotton pull-on pants with a pair of large plastic pants just like I was made to wear as an 8 to 12 year old. So on one particular Saturday morning I ventured off to a discount store a couple of miles from our house. Without delay I headed right for the baby section trying to take note of all the various items there while at the same time trying to make it seem like I wasn't really interested in case someone was looking at me. I finally picked out two pair of the largest toddler "Rubber Pants" (they were sized Extra Super Large) available and went to the check out line and put them on the counter behind a couple of other regular items I was purchasing so as to try and hide them.

A line was quick to form behind me and it was at that point that the cashier in training faced me so I could see her. Unfortunately for me, it turned out to be Sharon, a previous classmate of mine from the eighth grade. At first Sharon looked straight at me and asked how I was doing without even noticing what I had just put down on the counter. Once she saw the baby pants, however, she picked them up and looked at me and said, "Are these extra super large rubber baby pants for you Steven?!" I felt about the size of a small toddler after she made that comment and was sure that my secret diaper and rubber pant fetish would certainly leak out. At this time I thought I was the only one in the world with such oddities. My face turned beet red and I stumbled for a few words to try an say in retaliation. All I could think of at the time was that I was purchasing them for my sisters child. What a poor excuse but it was all I could think of. Why else would I be purchasing rubber pants?

Sharon and I did attend different high schools so I could only hope this incident would blow over with time and she wouldn't tell anyone I knew and would maybe just forget about it. I'm sure you can understand that all I wanted to do after this humiliation was to leave as quickly as I had come in. Maybe what I experienced was only a bad dream. Not! It was of course no dream and Sharon had actually guessed right the first time. The extra super large baby pants were for me. I bet she never could have imagined that later that afternoon I would go to the privacy of my own room, undress, and jerk-off in them! Although the pants were very large, they were much too small for a 120 pound 14 year old boy, and the waterproof pants were most tight as I struggled to pull them up my legs and over top my bulging boyish erection. With them snugly in place I jacked myself off to a climax that was most exhilarating, but I knew I would soon have to find a larger pair which would be the right fit.

Although I did find this to have been a most humiliating experience at the time, I now look back on this true story with fond memories and only wish the story could have continued into a fantasy where Sharon uses this incident to blackmail me into her very own BEDWETTING DIAPER SLAVE! I need to give this some consideration and work on a story along these lines some day!

Chapter 12

It wasn't until the beginning of my sophomore year of high school that I first began noticing magazine advertisements for hygienic pants that would help stop, "WET BEDS." The terms incontinence and enuresis were both new to me. I can remember how excited I was when I saw my first incontinent pant advertisement in a Parade magazine one Sunday afternoon. The diaper pant described in the advertisement claimed that it was used quite successfully by many children and adults. The ad specifically mentioned that this product was ideal in treating childhood bedwetting problems. Pictured on the advertisement were a sketch of a man, woman, and boy, and all were wearing a pair of the incontinent pants.

I will never forget going to our local post office and purchasing a money order for a pair of these diaper pants. I couldn't have the package shipped to my house for fear of discovery, so I managed to arrange for the package to be sent to the post office. I had to fabricate a story the postal lady would buy, so I told her that I was getting a gift for my mothers birthday and I didn't want my mom to see the package in our mail box because it was to be a surprise. The kind lady thought it was so nice of me to do this for my mother, and she gladly agreed to accept delivery of the package at the post office on my behalf. It took about 2 weeks before it arrived, and I must have worn the postal lady out with all my phone calls during the second week to see if it was there yet. Luckily for me, when the package did arrive, it was in a very discrete brown covered envelope, so the contents were not easily detectable.

You can only imagine what an absolutely thrilling time this was for me, and the anticipation I felt upon opening up my first pair of incontinent pants was immense. The new garment consisted of two items and it came with directions on how to set it up. I put the thick cloth diaper soaker pad into the separate plastic diaper cover as was instructed. The reusable diaper cover was very similar in design to a disposable diaper and even had Velcro tabs at each side for easy fastening. Once assembled, I lied the diaper on the bed and my young boyhood immediately came to full attention! I then lied down on top of the diaper and pulled it up on each side and securely strapped myself into it. I remember standing up with the bulky diaper on and seeing myself in the mirror for the first time and thinking how similar I looked to an overgrown toddler!

I loved the feel of the thick diaper against my skin, and especially how the plastic outer covering felt as I rubbed my hands back and forth over it. It felt good rubbing my crotch area in this manner and in knowing that my young teenage erection was safely protected underneath! Being one for a little adventure, I wanted to see what it would be like to go a little public with my diapers on. So I grabbed a pair of loose fitting sweat pants, pulled them up over top the diapers, and then put a T-shirt on. My mom was in the kitchen preparing dinner while my younger brothers were in the recreation room watching television when this was occurring. I felt totally naughty as I walked from my bedroom down the hallway to the recreation room. If one really studied it, they would know something was up from all the added bulk concentrated in my crotch area and underneath the sweat pants. Also, a slight rustling noise could be heard from the diaper pants with each step taken.

Needless to say, I was very self conscious about being in such a diapered state and also with the fear that I might be discovered. Still, I did manage to make it to the recreation room and was able to sit in one of the couches behind my brothers without them apparently noticing. With my brothers absorbed in their television show, I sat quietly on the couch admiring the thick bulk beneath the sweat pants. When I heard my mom scream from the next room that dinner would be ready in 15 minutes, I knew my little adventure was about to come to an end. I would need to retrace my steps back to the bedroom quickly, then remove my clothing and secret diapers, and change back into regular clothes for dinner. I would also need to find a quick and secure hiding place for the new diaper pants! I must admit that going out into the open with diapers on underneath my clothes was a thrilling new experience, but at the same time it did make me extremely nervous.

Later, while in the private confines of my bedroom, I had time to completely test the diaper pants, and found that when I was laying in bed and would wet on purpose, some of my piss would leak out. This particular incontinent pant did not have elastic leg and waist openings and it was a major engineering flaw with the product. If I had been actually bedwetting at this age, and in true need of these pants, I'm sure I would have given up on them early on just because of the annoying leakage problem. Still, I did enjoy the diaper pants very much and was both excited by them and also further positively reinforced with each and every climax that was enjoyed while fantasizing and jerking-off!

Chapter 13

When I was 16 years old, I started having much stronger desires for DIAPERS and RUBBER PANTS! During this time, I was beginning to discover that drug stores carried incontinent supplies. What started at this point was what would become an over 10 year hobby and fascination with looking through the incontinent section of any drug or medical store I stumbled upon. Most incontinent sections are usually somewhere in the back section of the store and I always try to play nonchalantly that I was searching for something else while what I was really after were some authentic diapers and rubber pants!

Being a rather shy boy and one who embarrasses very easily, I always felt so self-conscious when in these situations. In a fantasy realm, I desperately desire to be publicly exposed, humiliated, and made to suffer the consequences of my naughty BEDWETTING. Diaper domination and discipline if very much a part of these fantasies. Of course real life is a somewhat different story, however.

Once during my 16th year I can remember watching Johnny Carson one evening and he had a guest on that night that talked about a new book he had read by Sheri Hite entitled, "Men in Love." Johnny's guest thought one of the parts in it was so ridiculously funny and told the audience, "Can you actually believe that there are guys in this book who actually get-off by dressing up in diapers?" Wow! I had never heard of this before and prior to this television show I thought I was the only one in the world with this peculiarity. That there was a possibility of others with diaper interests like me was quite a revelation. I could hardly wait for the next day to arrive so I could go to the store to find the book Johnny's guest had mentioned.

"Men in Love" was a best seller at the time and it had many different subjects dealing primarily with what turns males on sexually. In the chapter entitled, "Watersports," there were two men in different letters that shared their secret fetishes for diapers and rubber pants. They told about how diapers and rubber pants aroused them sexually. At the end of one of the guys stories, he made the comment, "...I'm sure that catalogue mail order companies like Sears must sell quite a few incontinent pants to other adults with diaper fetishes as well."

Guess what catalog I began to check out that afternoon?

Chapter 14

After reading Sheri Hites "Men in Love", my eyes were opened to the possibilities of Sear's being a source for incontinent supplies. So I went right down to Sears that same afternoon and browsed through their mail order catalog. In the index in bold print was just what I was looking for, "ADULT DIAPERS," page 155. Sears offered a wide assortment of pull-on and snap-on incontinent pants that were made out of vinyl and you could order cloth liners separately that would snap into their briefs. They also offered adult diapers both disposable and reusable.

I placed my first order over the phone and was told I would be able to pick it up within only 5 days. Anxiously I awaited for the phone call from Sears to tell me my order had arrived. At the time, Sear's had a system whereby you were given a bin number according to your last name and phone number. With the number of the bin written on the invoice the customer was sent down the aisles to pick up their order from the bin. As I walked down the aisles I did pay special attention to the fact that most of the other customer orders were already wrapped up and put into bags, but when I got to my bin, my rubber pants and reusable adult diapers were not wrapped up at all. The person responsible for getting the orders together must have thought it would be kind of cute to keep the items unwrapped so as to embarrass the purchaser went they had to take the items to the cashier for check-out.

Here I was a 16 year old boy who was totally embarrassed having to purchase rubber pants and diapers from a perfect stranger. The cashier gave me a funny look and asked me to make sure I had received all of the following as they appeared on my invoice;

3 - ADULT DIAPERS, BIRDSEYE TRIPLE PLY $ 34.95

1 - INCONTINENT BRIEFS, SNAP-ON SIZE LARGE $ 14.95

1 - INCONTINENT BRIEFS, PULL-ON SIZE LARGE $ 14.95

I agreed that all the items were there and signed the invoice, paid for the purchase and quickly disappeared out the back door and drove my parents car home.

As the years past, I order my share of vinyl incontinent pants and other supplies from Sear's as they were one of the only sources for these type adult products I knew of at the time. I did, however, still yearn for a pair of pull-on style cloth diaper pants and a pair of waterproof plastic pants like those that I wore as an 8 to 12 year old.

The adult diapers from Sear's were made from birdseye material and they had a blue barrier on the outside that was supposed to make them waterproof. In order to fasten the diapers I had to use safety pins made for babies and would wear vinyl pants over top for extra protection. You can imagine how sneaky I had to be from the ages of 16 to 18 as I was still living at home and could not afford to be caught with any of this damaging evidence.

Chapter 15

Another fond memory from my teenage years also occurred during my 16th year and as a sophomore in high school. I was visiting my friend Susan at her aunt and uncles home one evening. Susan was from California and was temporarily living with her relatives in the Washington Metropolitan area. As part of her agreement for room and board, Susan would regularly babysit her aunt and uncles children. They had two boys, 6 year old Mike and 8 year old Kenny, and a daughter Sarah age 11.

Susan had invited me over to watch some television and help pass the time while she babysat the kids. When I arrived, Mike and Kenny were busy playing with two of their other friends who were there for a sleepover. Sarah was in her own room doing her own thing. As I walked into the recreation room the boys were all busy romping around and carrying on like normal boys these ages. I immediately noticed that Kenny was wearing an extra large T-shirt with some obviously thick cloth diapers on underneath. His diapers were held up tautly by a frosty pair of extra large rubber pants! Kenny's oversized T-shirt was doing a lousy job of concealing his puffed out bottom. As Kenny tumbled to the floor, his baby pants were exposed for all to see. Kenny was absolutely the cutest diaper boy I had ever seen, and I really enjoyed seeing an 8 year old dressed this way.

I tried to be cool about the situation and act as if I wasn't interested in what Kenny was wearing. At one point, he came over and sat on a bar stool next to Susan and I. The way he sat on the bar stool and faced us fully exposed his plastic baby pants and they were quite puffed out due to the thick diapers he was wearing underneath.

What then took place is something I will never forget as long as I live as it was a most adorable scene. Susan took her hand and placed it right on top of Kenny's exposed and bulging RUBBER BABY PANTS! She then squeezed his thick baby pants with her fingers and even jerked his diaper pants from the left and then to the right while she looked down at him and smiled saying, "Kenny wears D I A P E R S ! ! !"

Before this exposure, Kenny had seemed like he was unaware he was wearing diapers but after Susan's remarks the youngster became fully aware of his diapered shame and he blushed profusely. He was completely furious at Susan for humiliating him in front of me in this manner and he immediately pulled the T-shirt down over top his baby pants to try and hide his diaper clad bottom from us. He then rushed out of the room in tears.

I asked Susan, "Why is Kenny wearing diapers at his age?" She responded, "Kenny is a chronic bedwetter and his mom put him back in night diapers to cut down on laundry." About a half hour later Susan led Kenny upstairs to get him ready for bed and I really wished I could have gone with her and seen the young bedwetters room. I would have like to have checked out his bed and seen the plastic or rubber sheeting he slept on.

Seeing an older boy in thick diapers and rubber pants like this surely made a prominent impression on me and I was very turned on by it and would often fantasize about it later. In this situation, I actually felt very envious that Kenny got to wear diapers and rubber pants for his bedwetting. I wished that I could get Susan to humiliate me in diapers like she had just done to young Kenny. A sixteen year old in diapers is pretty rare so just think about the blackmail potential Susan could have had if she knew I secretly dressed up in diapers during jerking-off sessions. It would have been great if Susan had found out about my secret and made me her very own diaper slave as a result. I'm sure there would have been all kinds of humiliating experiences.

I really wished I could have been there to witness Kenny getting strapped into his diapers and rubber pants at the beginning of the evening. I could only imagine how much fun Susan must have had making a production out of diapering the young 8 year old. Kenny would be in his early 20's today, and I wonder if he likes wearing diapers today. I'm sure he got to experience lots bedwetting and diapering situations as a child and it is sure to of had an impact on his adulthood.

Chapter 16

During my teenage years I still did a lot of normal high school stuff like sports and dating girls. The diaper attraction came and went and never really got out of hand during this period. I journeyed off to college at age 18 and on the first night sleeping in my new bunk I had a BEDWETTING ACCIDENT that was very humiliating. I will send you this story if you request it.

It was during my last two years in college and while living in an apartment by myself that I began collecting more and more baby articles. At this time, I was buying adult sized disposable diapers for heavy loss of bladder control. I would put the diapers on under regular clothes and go out in public places and wet them. I found an outstanding brand called, "Dry Comfort." The disposable diapers were thick and bulky, made a tremendous amount of noise underneath clothing, and they also didn't leak. What a thrill to be able to piss in my diapers anytime and any place!

I also really enjoyed reading Forum magazine during my college years and liked the kinky letter section the best. Occasionally, I would stumble upon a letter with a fantasy about diapers and I would read the particular fantasy over and over again while jacking off in diapers and rubber pants.

One of the Forum publications around 1987 mentioned the Diaper Pail Fraternity after a fantasy letter and they gave DPF's address. A few years later I found the article and wrote to DPF. When I received the DPF catalog it was such a thrilling experience. I was very excited and stimulated by their products, stories, and services. I joined DPF around 1991 and have been a member ever since.

My diaper and bedwetting desires still come and go every once in a while, and after I've been deeply involved with the fetish I sometimes need to take a break and pursue other interests. Early on I thought I could give the fetish up by throwing all the diapers and rubber pants out. Somehow I always end up returning to bedwetting, diapers, and rubber pants. I now realize I will never be able to completely this deeply ingrained fetish! For it is true that once a Diaper Boy always a Diaper Boy!

Chapter 17

After completing college I moved to Florida and took my growing supply of diapers and rubber pants with me. I met a woman there several years older than me who had one of the rooms in her house set up as a nursery. It contained a changing table, playpen, crib, and lots of stuffed animals and toys. I fantasized about the possibilities of this woman eventually turning me into a baby and diapering me in the nursery.

Our relationship did become quite intimate over time and I eventually confided in her about my diaper fetish. This was the first person I had ever told about my secret. She was very understanding but like most women was not turned on by diapers and rubber pants. Unfortunately I never actually got diapered by her or was humiliated in diapers as I had fantasized. I was allowed to store my supply of diapers and rubber pants in her house and would still occasionally put them on while masturbating to an exciting diaper related letter in Forum magazine.

While in Florida, I also got to pursue one of my favorite hobbies, that of visiting drug stores and checking out their incontinent supply section. At this time in my life, drug stores were the only source I knew of other than Sears that carried incontinent supplies. I must have visited practically every drugstore in the state of Florida during my stay there. I never have really cared for the larger national drug store chains, however, because they pretty much only sold the same brands of disposable adult diapers and usually offered no cloth or plastic reusable products.

The mom and pop style drug stores were always the type I sought out and usually the older the store the better. The older stores usually have a section containing reusable incontinent pants or diapers and sometimes in my searching I would be lucky enough to stumble upon a box that looked like it may have been sitting on the shelf for 20 years or more. Manufacturers produced some pretty interesting incontinent garments in the late 50's and 60's although of course these items would be very archaic by today's standards.

One day I hit the jack pot and stumbled upon a very old drug store just outside Ft. Lauderdale. I am always very shy and highly embarrassed when on these type searches, and will pretend I'm in the store for something else other than diapers and rubber pants. When I got to the incontinent section, I could not believe my eyes as there were literally dozens upon dozens of boxes of incontinent pants lining the shelves. Fortunately, the pharmacist was busy filling out an order and the cashier was helping another customer on my arrival.

With my heart racing 90 miles an hour I used the brief moment of privacy to start opening some of the boxes on the shelf. The first box I came upon were adult Snap-On style plastic pants sized medium. The incontinent pants were made by the Salk Company, and the outside of the box contained a sketch drawing of a man, a woman, and an approximately 12 year old boy all standing next to each other and all wearing a pair of rubber pants. When I opened the box I almost went to diaper heaven. Ever since I was 14 years old, I had been searching for the perfect pair of plastic pants just like the kind I was made to wear as a youngster. And now many years later, and after hundreds of drug store searches, I had finally found them.

The waterproof incontinent pants were Salk's Pro Pants Style #450. The Snap-On plastic pants had a very comfortable built in cotton lining. They were absolutely adorable and very baby like. I picked out three pairs and went to pay for them. Having to confront the cashier on this particular afternoon was one of the most embarrassing things I have ever done and I desperately wanted to get out of that store as soon as possible.

The older woman behind the counter seemed to have an attitude that day and I gathered that she had quite possibly been down this road before with other boys looking for the same things. She seemed to take great delight in going very slowly while my things were on the counter and if she was trying to embarrass a boy purchasing baby pants she had achieved her goal. She took each pair of rubber pants out of the box and held them up and stretched the waistband to check and make sure they were the same size as the size on the box. She then looked at me as if to acknowledge that she knew rubber pants were for me and said, "Are you sure these will fit?" Meekly I nodded yes and fumbled with my wallet for the correct change.

Once out of the store I was greatly relieved and I immediately jumped in the back of my van, closed the blinds and put on a pair of the exciting new baby pants! My little boy thing immediately stood at attention as the plastic pants were pulled up to my waist and it felt so good to lay on the small bed and jack-off in them. What a most embarrassing but also thrilling experience this latest purchase had been and I was most pleased to have made this discovery. With three pairs of authentic baby pants my size now in my possession, I still only had to find a source for a thick pair of cloth pull-on diaper pants just like the kind I was made to wear as a 8 to 12 year old!