I am totally removed from my surroundings. I can hear indiscriminate conversation and metallic clanking sounds. The only thought I am certain of is that I exist. This sensation lasts only a minute; things become quiet. I slowly regain my sight and the recollection I am on the exam table at Dr. Kaplan’s office. I feel bloated and quickly expel the air Dr. Kaplan used as part of my procedure. I feel dizzy and have some intestinal discomfort. Thankfully it’s not nausea but minor cramping from the procedure.

There is a light knock at the door, I answer shallowly with a quick “Hi…” and Angie enters the room. “Hi Richard, how are you doing?” Angie asked in a low, sweet voice with a slight smile, “Do you feel OK?” I told Angie about the cramping and dizziness, She assured me the cramping will go away as I pass the air and she can get me a “vitamin” to help with the dizziness and perk me up. She told me my ride just got here and is in the waiting room.

Angie turned toward the cabinet and picked up a thermometer. She shook it down, read it and gave it a few more shakes. She looked at it in the light one more time and dipped it in the Vaseline. She told me to roll over and I complied as she approached me. I felt the cool air of the exam room on my rear end as Angie pulled my gown open, then began to insert the lubricated rectal thermometer. I was sore from the proctoscope and while the thermometer was cool and felt good, I began to tighten up as Angie put the thermometer in. Angie’s hand touched my shoulder, “Now just relax for me Richard, I know you’re a little sore back here but I need to know you are not developing an infection. Please relax for me and this will be the last time today”.

I tried my hardest to relax but I did and the thermometer slid in with slight discomfort. Angie cautioned me to hold still for the next 5 minutes. “We also have some very good news. You have only one polyp this time and Dr. Kaplan feels you can wait 5 years this time!”. The 5 minutes was finally up and Angie removed the thermometer. She wiped off the Vaseline and held it up to the light. She picked up the phone and said,” Dr. Kaplan, Richard woke up and I just checked his temperature. It’s 99.4, rectal. His ride is here so I will have him get dressed and then you can give his consult? OK, thanks”.

Angie hangs up the phone. She turns to me and asks if I will be ok to get dressed. I assured her I will be OK despite a little dizziness and feeling tired. “Would you like that vitamin I mentioned?” asked Angie as I was gathering my clothes. I said I would and she said she would get it to me as soon as Dr. Kaplan was done. She quickly exited the exam room. I managed to get my shirt and underwear on when another knock at the door. Dr. Kaplan walks in and backs up slightly. “I’m so sorry Richard, I didn’t realize you weren’t dressed”. I made a remark about seeing me in worse shape and her serious look became more relaxed.

Dr. Kaplan continued, “Using the proctoscope, I was able to remove a polyp that may not have otherwise been found. I will recommend repeating this procedure in 5 years, depending on the pathologist’s report. Other than the diverticulosis, you looked pretty good. Please try to increase your fiber intake to keep from inflaming it. I apologize for my actions earlier, I take professionalism quite seriously here as it is one of the few things I can offer my patients that is comparable to bigger practices that you have been going to. Nurse Ramirez thinks you have been a model patient and so do I. We would be honored if you would consider making me your primary. We will make it a point to take good care of you. “ She extended her hand and I shook it. I said I would most definitely change doctors and she replied with, “Thank you. I expect to see you back here in 6 months for a follow up on your BP and cholesterol…… and lose some weight…. Now go and be well” She smiled at me as she left the room with Angie slipping by.

Angie looks at me and said, “Good, you’re still undressed, time for your vitamin B12, now lay on your belly for me”. “Not again!....” . “It’s the last time today, Richard, this will make you feel better. After this you can go home and relax for the rest of the day.” I laid down and turned over for Angie. She pulled down my underwear and I can see her through the corner of my eye looking to find an injection site. I was just hoping she would avoid the still sore area where she gave me the first needle. I felt the alcohol as it was rubbed in a different place and was relieved. “Now just relax for me and it will be over in a minute” Angie warned me as I felt the needle go in me. Now this side began to hurt as she injected the vitamin. “Almost done, you’re doing good” and a few painful seconds later the needle was pulled out.

Angie pulled up my underwear and said, “You can finish getting dressed. Ring the call bell and I will walk you out”. I got my pants, socks and shoes on, paused for a moment and rang the bell. Angie popped her head in the room and asked, “You ready?” She quickly brushed my hair so it wasn’t so messy. She helped me up and I shuffled out of the room with her as she walked me out, holding my right arm. We walked out in the waiting area, my buddy waiting. She said to get the car and she would walk me out.

Angie walked me out to the car, opened the door and helped me in. I sat down and let out a moan from the pain. The last words from my angel in green scrubs were, “I know it hurts, go straight home and take some pain relievers, get some rest and if you feel up to it, eat something light today. If you have any trouble or feel worse, call us back.” She closed the door, flashed that sweet smile and waved to me. We pulled away from the curb and my buddy said I looked like I just lost a fight, joking around. I replied that I was OK and ready to go back for more in six months….