This a true story of an encounter with one of my wife's friends.

Andi, the farmers wife with her strong features, blue ice coloured, short, crisp hair, robust but firm figure, slim legs, sharp tongue and enormous tits was a wonderful early intro for me in terms of closeness in her presence and pleasing views. I can remember seeing her in the street over 50 year back, she worked with my wife Clare before I knew either of them, striding purposely, her bosom jutting, not bouncing like the prow of a galleon. She looked like a ship in full sail. I mused that her brassiere would be a colossal structure to hold those massive jugs I would ogle them as she passed, getting a steely eye in return, not knowing I would one day see her in close friendship and topless.

I grew to be pals with her now ex-husband Ged, his tight fistedness - OK with me, but she ended their marriage after two kids. In those day I would go rough shooting with him on one of his family's big dairy farms ( that was the annoying thing about Ged, he was loaded, why his long pockets? But maybe that's how the family got rich ) we would kill vermin like pigeons, squirrels, rabbits and such.

I had to return to the car and leave early for a serious business appointment, so I left Ged in the copse and walked to the farm yard and my car to get a bag. I was pretty grubby and needed not only to wash up, but to change my clothes and boots. Their ancient listed farmhouse door was never locked and as we were close friends, Clare and I always had access, on this day thinking Andi was out. Her car wasn't there and Ged's was in its usual place, plus a Land Rover. It was a big rambling place so in the hall I by-passed the kitchen and went directly to the adjacent utility/boot room but first I packed the shotgun in the gun cupboard, Ged had offered to clean it for me..

I washed my hands having offloaded my boots and corduroy trousers and stood in my underpants, drying hands etc and then I heard noises in the kitchen. Puzzled, I stepped to the slightly ajar door and through the hall I could see straight into the kitchen. It was fucking glorious. Andi on her knees, her sensible trousers covered her bounteous bum but she had for some reason decided to do her housework topless and her udders, no other acronym for those mighty orbs would suit them, hanging and swaying, her nipples nigh on scraping the old slabs on the floor. As she scrubbed, one of the reasons that finally ended the marriage, Ged wouldn't pay for a house maid, Andi worked hard on what little grime there was, but that was her upbringing.

Pale, pendulous orbs with very erect nipples swayed and clashed each other as Andi scrubbed and I stood silently, even holding my breath, mesmerised two rooms away until she shuffled on her knees out of sight. I had been amazed she hadn't kept her clothes, at least her brassiere, on to keep the tit weight in harness. I dressed, sorted my bag making my decision to enter the hall making a noise at the same time go into the kitchen and then see what happened.

Did I fancy a fuck? Is the Pope a Catholic? but my appointment was really too important, so I would have to chance another encounter with Andi if she succumbed to my charm.

Barging into the kitchen startled the farmer's wife dramatically. She knelt up and flung her arms over her tits, simultaneously knocking the bucket of water over, hiding her nipples but acres of flesh were still visible, her eyes wide in surprise, her jaw down until she softened slightly, her shoulders lowering and spoke.

“Gawd, you frightened me D. Where's Ged? What you here for? Oh fuck....,” the frantic questions rolled out and stopped as she saw the wet floor, then calmly proceeded to wipe it dry, while one hand tried to contain, unsuccessfully, the bulbous hang of her bags.

“I am sorry Andi, you surprised me too. I have to go early, he's still shooting and I thought you were out.”

“That's what comes of having an open house, but it's the first time anyone's come in seeing me like this,” she answered getting up to her knees, one hand on a chair for support, the other arm still shielding my view. “ Must be more careful.”

Andi must have noticed my slight smile as I absorbed how white and bounteous they were with a network of pale blue veins coursing them.

“You've seen tits before haven't you?” she challenged sharply with a giggle raising her other arm to augment the screening. “ Oh gawd I am sorry D, I'll find my stuff.”

“No need to be sorry and apologise Andy love. My mistake really, should have shouted when I came in but I thought you had gone out in the car.”

“Harry,” I knew that was her brother-in-law at the garage. “ Came to take it and work on the clutch, so I got on with the housework. Gawd - if he'd walked in like you did and he does, with my tits out, gawd that would have been awkward. It's a bit differe....”

“ Bit different 'cos it's me Andi? I don't think so, you're just a good mate for Clare. That doesn't mean I have free access to seeing your... well like this,” I gestured at her heaving hidden bosom. “ It is nice though,” I giggled, turning to leave and ease her embarrassment.

“Oh you men, all the same, get on with you,” Andi retorted jovially swivelling towards the lounge, finally shouting, “Don't tell Clare will you.”

“ Course not. I'll let myself out then,” I called nearly at the back door, turning and getting a last view of her now free to swing and wobble jugs as she disappeared through the lounge door. I never did find out why she was scrubbing the floor while topless. I could only put it down to the fact that it was extremely hot, we didn't shoot much, most stuff would be in the shade and I remembered from Clare that the ex-town girl suffered with a sweating medical condition – hyper something.

The right moment or occasion never got me to fuck Andi, but we had many a laugh about that surprise encounter.