I’d say that my most recent enema was about three hours ago. It was not a pleasant affair. I have enjoyed enemas since puberty, and that was a LONG time and a lot of enemas ago. Almost all of them were for recreational purposes. Up till recently I have not been much troubled by constipation. When I was very little my mother took me over her lap and inserted soap stick suppositories to make me defecate, but I feel sure that was her way of toilet training me and not because I was constipated. If anything I had the opposite problem. Allow me to interject a little anecdote here. When I was perhaps five years old I came down with a respiratory infection that was deemed serious enough to require a short hospital stay. My mother was with me when they took me to my bed. I was a rather anxious, fearful kid and under the stress of hospitalization I pooped in my bed. My mother sought out a nurse to notify her of the problem, explaining in her obtuse way that I had had a bowel problem. The nurse immediately chirped, “Oh, shall we give him an enema?”
Anyway, I only received one enema from my parents for supposed constipation. I must have been about six, and it was my first bag enema. I remember overhearing my mother (who was definitely a klismo herself) tell my dad, “I think he needs an enema.” My dad was not one to cross swords with mom so he went along with her program. She got out her red, open top enema bag that was always hanging on her bathroom door and after they decided on the parameters (how much water, how much soap, which nozzle, what position, etc.) she prepared the enema and she sat on the bed next to me and inserted the nozzle and openened the clamp, (i’ll always remember that metallic click), while dad stood by holding the bag. i’ll also remember that first rush of water and how nicely it tickled. I think I was hooked then. That was the only time my parents used the enema bag on me, but you can bet that I used it on myself when they weren’t around.
But let’s fast forward maybe 70 years or so. Over recent months I seem to have developed a propensity to get bound up, something that i’ve never really had to deal with before. I posted about this on ziti some weeks ago and received some helpful. I attributed the problem to a change of diet - low carbs, not much meat, lots of veggies. I reduced the amount of fiber I was taking in. I cut out some other supplementation as well. For a while this seemed to be working. But last Thursday I felt bound up again, so I took an enema. It was not only ineffective, the large amount of fecal matter I was holding could not get past the anal sphincter and I had to use my fingers to break it up and dig it out. I hate it when that happens. It also leaves me with a sore anus. Now by rights I would have taken another enema Saturday so as to not accumulate too much waste. But my asshole was still sore so I waited til Sunday. Big mistake. Way too much hard feces, back to digging again, more soreness. I wanted to take an enema yesterday just to see the results and whether there was any more shit in there. I chickened out. I was still very sore. I waited until this afternoon to give it a try. I knew that something wasn’t right the moment I inserted my baseball bat style nozzle. Despite a ton of lube it just resisted going in. Eventually I got it in sufficiently to deliver the enema (2 qts water). I usually use very warm water but today I used only luke warm water and it did seem to be less irritating, although I still had moderate cramping. The bad news came when it was time to expel. I could feel that I had a blockage. I strained with all my might and, astonishingly, managed to pass the bonus. I never saw the culprit but I know it was massive because it stopped up my toilet. Another task i’ll postpone until tomorrow. I’ll forego any further enemas until Thursday and give my anus a rest, and hopefully I can get on an every other day schedule and see how well that works for me. Wish me luck,
acerbas (rhymes with sore ass, sorta)